I was lucky enough to get to play with Domina Yuki today. She’s a very talented domme and as usual it was a great session with lots of groans, screams and whimpers. I can only hope the soundproofing in our playspace was good.
One thing I found particularly interesting was my emotional reaction to a whipping. I was lying face down on padded bench to receive it, looking to one side as she hit me with a heavy leather whip. To start with I was looking directly at her and the whipping felt incredibly intimate. Our only contact was the strands of the whip, and yet it felt like a caress. As others might feel about an intimate hug or a kiss, I felt about watching her swing this whip against me. It was almost a sexual experience.
After a number of strokes she moved around to my other side, where I couldn’t see her, and that changed the dynamic dramatically. Suddenly it was a challenge. I had to focus inside of myself and push through. The endorphins continued to flow but rather than being in an intimate situation I felt objectified. I could no longer project my feelings towards her and had to turn inward instead. I’m sure the strength of the blows were no different, yet they felt harder.
In hindsight the experience was a fascinating insight into the role of the brain in modifying pain and the way we can contextualize powerful sensations. It was almost a childlike reaction – sadistic peak-a-boo. Intellectually I always knew I was being hit by Mistress Yuki, but only when I could see her did it take on a different meaning.
Hi paltego,
A very subtle and interesting observation. That’s why I love your blog so much.
Best,
scott
Mrs. Kelly’s Playhouse
Thanks scott! Glad you appreciated the post and my musings on the topic.
-paltego
Hi Paltego:
You make an interesting and valid point here. I have also found that watching my dominant during corporal takes some of the sting out of it. Conversely, I find that being deprived of visual stimuli makes taking a beating more challenging. We also like to indulge in foot/shoe/boot worship during corporal which makes a whipping more pleasurable and less punishing. I find it a bit like having my cake and eating it too…
Congrats on another great session with Ms. Yuki! Cheers and Happy New Year!
Best
hmp
Hey hmp,
Good to hear I’m not alone on this. After pondering some more about it, and reading the comments here, I think there’s probably several elements at play. One is the surprise/predictability element that Miss Margo mentions. Another is the balance of nice stuff to encourage endorphins and happiness that you refer to. I suspect there’s also an element of projection onto the domme – ‘Doing it for her’ – which is easier if she is visible rather than hidden and hence more abstract.
Happy New Year to you as well! Hope you and Her Majesty have a great one.
-paltego
Interesting observation!
I’ve found that whippings are more stressful/harder to take if I can’t see the Top, or if my vision is taken away via blindfold. If I see the blow coming, I can process it much better, for some reason.
If I don’t see it, the anticipation makes the pain much worse.
Hi Miss Margo,
Thanks for stopping by. Surprise v’s predictability is definitely an aspect of it. As I mentioned in my rely to hmp, I suspect there’s a whole bunch of related things than are at play here. Kind of surprising for such a simple aspect of a scene. A blindfold adds even more complexity to it. For me it was just a question of which side she was standing, but I think the sensory deprivation of a blindfold increases intensity another notch.
Happy New Year!
-paltego