Mistress Lola Ruin has published a lovely blog post on her experiences of sharing her own vulnerability with slaves and letting the facade of being a perfect dominant Goddess slip. I like the post a lot because I’ve always thought the idea of needing to present a perfect invulnerable facade to be a great domme was badly flawed. Deep down we know that we’re all human, so to pretend otherwise lacks authenticity. A domme shouldn’t have to fit herself into a submissive’s fantasy in order to be respected and exalted. Those things should come even with knowledge of the dommes humanity and vulnerabilities. That’s what makes them meaningful.
Mistress Lola Ruin is a pro-domme based in Manchester, UK. You find her twitter feed here and information on arranging a session with her here.
That post is incredible, and if I had the great good fortune to be able to submit to her in real life, I would because of what she wrote.
Glad you liked it. If I was ever back in the UK for an extended period, she’d definitely be someone I’d want to reach out to.
-paltego
And, I forgot to add, sometimes we subs miss the point that these amazing women, whom we are so fortunate to be able to session with, are actual human beings.
Three times I suggested talk as a session theme with no or limited touching, only words in whatever context she chose. Those have been among my most memorable, I think, because I met more of her as a person as she explored my interior fears and vulnerabilies.
That’s fascinating. Not sure I’ve ever heard of anyone doing a session predicated on no or limited physical contact. Was this with Lola Ruin?
-paltego
Sorry, not with Lola Ruin. I may have hijacked your thread because it triggered my own shared vulnerability experience. This was because I realized through your post that I suggested such a session theme only with dominants who are as described by her post.
By the way, no or limited touch did not equate to no stress. All three sessions became memorable for me because I was forced, in different ways, to go deeper into the question why I was there (my vulnerability) and why she might care (hers).
Peace,
Pat
No need to apologize and not a hijack at all. I’m intrigued by the idea of they kind of session you describe. If it’s possible without revealing too much personal information, can you share a little more detail? What gave you the idea and how did you approach it? What was the dynamic? I don’t personally do a lot of psychological play, so I’m always interested to hear from those that do.
-paltego