Sociopaths

Interesting article here from the Guardian on Patric Gagne, a sociopath who has written a book on her condition and her life.

I think if you asked the general public what professions lend themselves to sociopaths then, alongside the obvious things like CEO and politician, there’d be a good chance of pro-domme coming up. After all, tying people up and hurting them does align with the cliched media portrayal of sociopaths as sadistic serial killers. Both tend to have secret dungeons and cages to lock people in.

However, if you read the article, I think it’s pretty clear a sociopath would be a terrible fit for a pro-domme. They’re typically impulsive, risk taking, lie easily and have very low empathy. Where a successful pro-domme needs to plan ahead, be risk aware and have a very high degree of empathy. A lot of what makes a great session with a domme goes on inside the submissive’s head. If the domme doesn’t understand that inner life then they’ll have great difficulty creating the desired experience. It’s easy to hurt someone, but hard to do it exactly the right way, both physically and mentally.

Of course, while you might not what to find yourself in a dungeon with a sociopath, the fictional versions can still be fun. This is Jodie Comer, who plays Villanelle in Killing Eve.

Taking him for a walk

The art below (originally sourced via madam is all) is by the artist mrkotten.  You can find the original deviant art post here.

It’s a fun fantasy to be walked like a pet, but I always feel very clumsy in this position. It works for humiliation, but going for a walk at any sensible speed isn’t all that practical. That’s a shame, as I think a lot of submissives would love bounding alongside their owner at knee level.

More Cut Aways

If you liked the cut away Femdom house I featured last month then I’ve good news! The artist – KouYou – has done a whole series of them. You can find them on Twitter – #1, #2, #3, #4 and #5. I think they’re fabulous. Inventive, funny and yet still kind of hot.

In this one (the 5th one in the series) I particularly like the femdom fighting game that’s being played in the top right room. Plus, bonus cats hanging out with them.

Choking

The NY Times has an opinion piece (free link) on the widespread trend of choking in otherwise non-kinky sexual relationships. As you might expect, it’s not a healthy trend, with both short and long term risks. It highlights that a lot of experienced BDSM players think choking is too dangerous, so it’s weird to find it spreading among the vanilla folk.

One part that initially caught my eye was this:

Sexual strangulation, nearly always of women in heterosexual pornography, has long been a staple on free sites…

My initial reaction was annoyance at the usual femdom erasure. We F/m types can do stupid dangerous stuff as well! But on second thoughts, it actually isn’t common in Femdom material at all. You see breathplay pretty often, often smothering with bums on faces, but rarely dommes putting hands around necks. Yay for sensible kinky folk!

I’m not entirely sure where this is from, but I’d guess it’s a mainstream fashion shoot rather than kinky porn.

Anne Hathaway

Ms. Hathaway was the cover story for a recent edition of Vanity Fair. There was even a kinky slant, with some very fetishistic outfits. While I’m a fan of her work and have featured her in past posts, but I’m not entirely sure about this photoshoot. I know I risk Servitor never speaking to me again,  but it does seem to waste her talents with odd shots like this one. How do you combine someone as iconic as Anne Hathaway with latex fashion and not produce an amazing photoshoot?

In better news, she’s also the face of new Versace Icons campaign. I think this shot and the other’s from that campaign are a lot more complementary and capture the fashion fetish aesthetic better.

This one time at Orchestra Practice

Writing the previous post on a minor wardrobe malfunction reminded me of a far more traumatic event many years back.

I was a teenager and attending school orchestra practice for my first and – with hindsight – only time. My given instrument was the cello, which I played really, really badly. However, the music teacher must have been particularly desperate for warm bodies and had invited me to join. I was surprised and intimidated to discover that the majority of the orchestra members were girls, mostly from the year or two above mine. This was not a crowd I was used to hanging with.

As I lurked around the edge of the music room I began to wonder if this could be an exciting new world for me. I was shy and terribly nervous about approaching girls. Was orchestra was the way in? Maybe if I actually started practicing, rather than trying to jam a week’s worth of work into the hour before each lesson, I could make a place for myself here. Could the hated cello turn out to be my path to romantic bliss?

As I contemplated these new possibilities a tall older girl detached herself from her group of friends and walked over to me.

“Tell me,” she said, loud enough for all to hear. “Do you often walk around with your trousers undone?”

Glancing down I realized that my zip had chosen the perfect moment to fail. My trousers were agape and my briefs on display to the school’s brass and string sections. Romantic bliss suddenly looked very unlikely. I fled to the washroom to effect some repairs and somehow made it through the practice. A few days later I had stroke of luck – I broke my arm. That wasn’t exactly pleasant, but it got me out of playing the cello, the orchestra and my scene of shame. Every cloud has a silver lining.

That all  happened 30+ years ago and I still die inside when I think about it now. It sadly never transmuted itself into a kink. At least not for humiliation. If anyone wants to pull on a school uniform and beat me up, well that might be a different story.

Image is from Team Rinryu, the folks behind the Yapoo Market series.

Never A Kink Around When You Need One

I’m surprised I’ve never developed a humiliation kink. God knows, I’ve given myself enough opportunities.

My latest non-consensual attempt happened in my building’s elevator. I was heading out to get coffee, wrapped up warm against the chill of Seattle in April. A rather attractive younger woman got on, smiled at me and said hello. She kept glancing across at me, asking how my day was going and made some cheerful small talk about the weather. I wasn’t delusional enough to think she was flirting, but it’s always nice to have a positive interaction with neighbors. I walked up to my coffee shop in a cheerful mood. It wasn’t until I’d arrived and taken off my  black woolen hat that I realized that I’d put it on inside out. The white care label was sticking straight up on the top, like a giant surrender flag of lost dignity. No wonder she kept looking back at me. It’s not often you see a 50 year old man who still hasn’t figured out how to dress himself properly.

Here’s once answer to the problem of errant clothing – an official uniform and a domme who inspects every aspect of it extremely closely. That’d certainly help focus the mind of a morning. The drawing is – of course – by the brilliant Sardax.

More Hood

A lot of shots featuring hoods look terrible because they’re obviously just being used to conceal the submissive’s face. I get the logic of that but it typically ruins the image for me. It’s hard to enjoy  a kinky scene if one of the participants is embarrassed to be seen doing it.

This lovely image from Natalie Noir shows how a hood can be used whilst still making the shot work aesthetically and erotically. There’s a cohesive design to it that makes sense of the hood. I particularly love the little locks on the chin strap.

Natalie Noir is a Zurich based pro-domme. You can find her professional site here and her twitter feed here.

Hood Heaven

I love the idea and aesthetics of hoods, while also being a total wuss when it comes to wearing them. A domme can do all sorts of heinous things to my delicate bits and I’ll be fine, but stick a bit of material over my face and it’s freak-out city. Claustrophobia sucks.

Anyway, for those that do share my love of the fantasy, here’s some fun artwork by Miss Domme. Pick your favorite.

You can find more from Miss Domme at her Patreon,  DeviantArt and Twitter, amongst others.