Femdom Resource – Page 191 – The beauty of dominant women

Enthusiastic consent

Gawker has published one of the better articles I’ve seen recently in the mainstream press on sex and kink. Entitled ‘Vanilla Sex: A Perfectly Fine Way to Fuck‘ its message was to avoid trying to categorize sex and instead concentrate on discussion. What matters is what you and your partner(s) want, not some arbitrary definition of normality. It finishes with fine advice applicable to almost any sexual situation…

And that, I think, is what’s missing from vanilla sex. Rather than trying to “spice up” your love life with imported sexual practices that don’t fit your tastes, why not borrow kink culture’s emphasis on dialogue and enthusiastic consent? The hottest move your sex life can steal from kink isn’t handcuffs, it’s discussion
From a Gawker article by Monica Heisey

It’s tricky to pick an image to represent the concept of enthusiastic consent, so here’s a couple who at least look happy and enthusiastic about what they’re doing. Plus, if you’re going to do breathplay like this, consent is pretty important.

This is from the Hom Smother site. I found it on the Felm Cyber tumblr.

Art and reality

One of the things I enjoy about erotic artwork is its ability to portray the strange and fantastic. Artists like Sardax, Namio Harukawa and Augustine do a wonderful job of capturing the extremes of sexual fantasies in a way that still connects with people. Yet the thing I like most about the piece below is it’s realism. I don’t mean that in the visual sense – it’s clearly not a hyperrealistic drawing – but in the mood and style of play it captures. It feels like a moment from a scene I might do or have done. There’s no crazy bondage positions, massive strap-ons or extreme outfits. Just some rope, clothespins and a nice sense of intimacy and connection.

The artist is Tingos and you can see more of his work on his tumblr. I found it via the Lunar Black tumblr.

Put him in the uncomfortable chair!

Here’s my final post of what has turned into a trio featuring male rope bondage. This one shows Bobbi Starr making unconventional but effective use of a chair. Whatever she has in mind for him, it’s a great position for access to all the interesting areas.

This is from the Men in Pain site.

Pulling him close

Here’s another happy man wrapped in some rope. Admittedly I can’t actually see his expression, so unlike yesterday’s shot, I can’t definitely say he’s happy. But I’m willing to wager that he’s feeling pretty good about his situation.

The image is oddly entitled ‘Brutal‘ (free deviant art login needed). Not quite sure about the title, but I do like the image. It’s by Pavel Ryzhenkov, known on Deviant Art as West-Kis, a photographer based in Belarus. I found it on the Femdom Delights tumblr.

Big smile

Tonight somebody mummified me in plastic wrap, stuck needles in my nipples and electrocuted my cock. I couldn’t be happier. All is right in my particular bit of the world. I’m now sitting on my couch, sore in all sorts of unusual places and drinking a glass of wine.

We didn’t capture any photographs of the session, so instead I’ll finish with a photograph of a chap who looks almost as happy as I am.

This is from Marshall Bradford Photography (main site here). I found it via the Happy BDSM tumblr.

Long time, no kink

It has been a long time since I got my kinky freak on. My schedule and Lydia’s schedule have conspired to frustrate me for almost 2 months now. I also haven’t had chance to travel to play in any of the other hot spots on the West coast. As problems go it’s not exactly a life altering one, but it has left me edgy and more frayed than usual. I’m definitely overdue the endorphin rush and general sense of emotional well-being that an intense play session gives me.

Luckily I’m due to get together with Lydia tomorrow night, so all should be well. Until then I have to survive 2 days of 8 hour planning meetings at work. That’s a whole different kind of torture.

I doubt my play with Lydia tomorrow will look much like this image. It’ll probably have more pain and less teasing involved. But I am hoping to achieve the kind of deep emotional and mental space he looks to be in.

This is by the Belgium artist Benoit Feroumont, who posts his erotic work under the handle Gracy Gimp.

Bed, breakfast and bondage

It’s certainly true that fancy equipment is not necessary for kinky fun. Simple toys, pervertibles or even just teeth and nails can be all that’s needed for a wonderful experience. However, while fancy equipment isn’t necessary, it can be fun to play with when the opportunity presents itself. One of the things I enjoy about playing with pro-dommes is the variety of equipment they typically have. Whether it’s a fancy bondage chair, an electroshock device or a just a nice array of paddles, I always appreciate the chance to try new things.

Any couples based around London and wanting to expand their kinky equipment options might want to check out Better than a bed. It offers fetish bed and breakfast in central London, with a wide array of furniture and toys to play with. I can’t offer any personal recommendation – I only know what I see from their website – but it does look like an interesting option for a kinky weekend away. If anyone knows of any similar fetish lodging options in other parts of the world then leave me a comment, and I’ll add pointers on my useful links page.

This image shows some of the chains, collars, clamps and leashes at Better than a bed.

Fingering his hole

Having featured anal play in the last few posts, I thought I’d move a little higher up the body, but keep the penetration theme going. There’s a lot of intense concentration being shown by both people in this shot from Divine Bitches.

The psychology of putting your fingers into someone’s mouth is fascinating to me. I think it’s a lot more complex than other types of penetration in that respect. Anal play is essentially passive – you lie there and quite literally take it in the ass. A mouth has articulation, a tongue and teeth. It can bite back. It’s the way we communicate and taste and kiss. It’s where we instinctively put a finger when we damage it, and where babies put their thumb to comfort themselves. To penetrate someone this way shows a degree of mental as well as physical control over them.

Strappado & strap-on

Here’s my final entry in what became a trio of anal themed artwork posts. I’m afraid I’ve no idea who the artist is for this one. The combination of strappado bondage and a strap-on is unusual. I can’t say it appeals to me as a way to play, but for those who like to mix pain and penetration it could be interesting to try. Although unless your partner is very tall, I suspect you’d need some kind of pulley system to get the right tension on the arms.

Completing the costume

Here’s another sexy artwork featuring a lady with anal play on her mind. Unlike yesterday’s shot, this looks less like a reward, and more like the start of some intense roleplaying.

Before writing this post I spent many minutes pondering the image and trying to decide why I found it so erotic. I think it’s down to the contrasts it displays. The bondage set-up and outfit is pretty extreme, yet they seem such a sweet couple. I love his blushing expression and her caring but determined look. That’s just how I like to play – heavy yet tender.

This was created by the artist Tilly Monster. You’ll need a (free) deviant art login to see her most ‘interesting’ work! She takes commissions if you’re interested in some custom artwork.