More Gift Ideas

If the handmade Italian leather boots from my last post aren’t quite what you’re after for the holiday gifting season, then perhaps I can direct your attention to something considerably more affordable and practical – a new book from Ferns. It’s called “How to Handle Disobedience” and comes complete with a handy acronym at no extra cost. By way of SLAPS you can get control of your unruly submissive and bring harmony to your D/s dynamic. Links to buy the book are located at the bottom of her latest post on it.

In the highly unlikely event that the wisdom of Ferns and SLAPS doesn’t work out for you then Dan Savage has another acronym to keep in mind – DTMFA.

This is a happy shot of domestic harmony and obedience. I’m afraid I don’t know the original source.

Lick Me

I’d seen these butt plug heeled ‘Lick Me’ boots before, but always assumed they were an art project rather than a real item of footwear. More fool me, because Madame Li Ying just posted a short clip of her modelling a pair. Their created by ainsley t (twitter here). It’s probably too late to get a pair for Christmas, but if you want to splurge on kinky fashion in 2020, they’ll make you a pair by hand in their Italian factory. I’m frankly surprised that I haven’t seen more dommes sporting boots from them.

Nubian Nympho Anna Amore’s Encore Pee-formance!

Despite the cesspool that is social media and the dangers of SESTA/FOSTA, I think it’s fair to suggest that the internet has generally been good for sex workers and pornography. The explosion in both the creation and consumption of porn would tend to confirm that. However, there have been causalities. One of them is the coverline writers for pornographic magazines. For example, take this copy of Nugget magazine from Dec ’98. Twitter, blogs and clipstores just don’t deliver writing like “Sommer Rain! Public pisser gushes gold on her front porch!” That’s a writer who obviously grew up reading the British tabloid press.

I’d never heard of Nugget magazine, but apparently it ran from 1956 to 2006. Over that time covers changed from examples like this one from 1959 featuring a new story by Jack Kerouac to the one above. I’m guessing that the article on Mistress Paris, the Big Titted Terror, isn’t quite up to to the same writing standards as the ’59 piece by Kerouac.

Kinky Equivalent of 69

Here’s a cute image of shared mutual pleasure. She gets a comfy spot to dominate him and drink her tea. He gets to make her happy and enjoy her feet smooshed in his face.

I’m not into feet as a kink, but this is an image that still appeals to me. Their contrasting facial expression with the shared connection via the cup and saucer really make it work.

The artist is signed as Suzy. I think that’s Suzy Q who has this instagram and is Lady Suzy Q, a specialist in foot fetish sessions (twitter site here). However, given I’m working via translation tools, it’s hard to be 100% sure. Image originally sourced from this tweet.

Beret Time

A couple of weeks back I posted that the veil was the least fetishized item of women’s clothing. I think this image introduces a late contender into that particular race – the beret. In all the years I’ve sacrificed to the studious and dispassionate analysis of attractive models in fetish gear, I think this might be the first hot beret shot I’ve found.

In my previous post on veils, I expressed surprise that it didn’t feature more often in femdom. I’m not going to go that route with berets. I think the hotness of this image is more a tribute to the talent of the women involved – Mistress Iris and Mistress Adreena Angela – than the hat in question. It’s like an UGG boot. You can make it sexy, but you have to work against its natural tendencies to do so.

Image was from this tweet, with latex outfits from Blacklickorish and shot in LA. I’ve had amazing sessions with both Mistress Iris and Mistress Adreena separately, so can’t imagine what the two of them would be like together. If they were taking joint sessions during this time, I hope the lucky LA submissives appreciated it.

Holiday Fun

Submissives in the Los Angeles area might want to circle next Saturday (the 14th) in their diaries. The Chi temple is holding their annual holiday party, with an all star list of dommes. I’ve never been in town at the right time to attend, but I have played privately with a fair number of the dommes involved, and I’m sure they’ll make it a very fun and sexy event. It’s also a beautiful and well appointed space. Frankly, if it wasn’t for the fact that I’m hosting my own (non-kinky) holiday party for friends that night, I’d be tempted to jump on a plane and escape the Seattle rain for some much needed fun in the sun.

Note that based on this post by Mistress An Li, I believe that only ‘established’ submissives may attend. Presumably that means you need to have played in the past with one of the dommes involved.

Use Your Words

Cosmo has an article out on picking and using a safeword. I’m going to go ahead and say that if you need help to pick a safeword, then BDSM probably isn’t for you. It’s only going to get a lot more complicated from that point onward. Maybe start with a good therapist to address your chronic indecisiveness and/or lack of imagination before getting the rope and whips out.

I also think it’s strange how all these articles assume beginners are starting off with heavy consensual non-consent scenes or  elaborate roleplay scenarios.

The minute you’re starting to feel uncomfy is the exact moment when you should go ahead and holler whatever safe word you and your partner chose to go with.

Obviously you could do that, but how about using your words? I’ve done hundreds of scenes, some of them pretty intense, and I don’t think I’ve used a safeword a single time. That has never stopped me communicating a wide variety of issues. In fact I think it’s quicker to say something like “I’m feeling faint” than it would be yell a safeword and then explain what’s going on.

I’m not saying you shouldn’t have a safeword. It’s good to have a single unambiguous stop button that brings everything immediate to a halt. But that’s not necessary for most scenes and most problems. Common issues that make people uncomfortable are pinching bondage, awkward positions, tingly fingers, anxiety, a bad fantasy headspace or just too much intensity in the sensations. It’s a lot easier to adjust for these as the scene progresses by communicating as you go rather than by simply stopping everything. Plus, it saves your safeword for those times when something is seriously awry and you want that to be communicated entirely unambiguously.

Let’s hope that these two negotiated a non-verbal safeword before starting this scene. He’s not going to be able to yell ‘Rumpelstiltskin’ with that funnel in place.

Artwork is of course by the famous Jim.

Centerpiece

We’re heading into the festive season. A time where friends and family gather to celebrate and share food.  For anyone hosting such an event and looking for ideas for a table centerpiece, can I suggest a naked man with candles and rope? Admittedly, he will take up a lot of table space. Wriggling due to hot wax may also be a problem. On the plus side, what a fabulous talking point! Much better than politics or listening to boomers complaining about the young people today. I can imagine several of my more senior female relatives getting a total kick out of this.

This image comes courtesy of Michelle Lacy of Order Of Indomitus. She’s a South Florida based pro-domme and her professional site is accessible here.

Problem Solver

A few posts back I wrote that “…watching dommes creatively problem solve and experiment on me in realtime is hot AF.” Thanks to a recent blog post by Bastienne Cross, I’d also now add that reading about them doing kinky problem solving to craft compelling sessions is also pretty damn hot.

Before I go further and actually provide the post link, I should add that the kinky session in question is a full toilet one. There’s no explicit detail or pictures, but if the very thought of that squicks you out, then it’s probably best avoided. For everyone else, the post in question is here. It provides the backstory to the unusual toilet design that I featured in this previous post. I’m guessing the ‘Panda’ of the original scene is also who commented on that post.

I never thought I’d find myself impressed by someone coming up with creative and thoughtful ways to literally crap on people, but here we are. Life can lead you in odd directions at times.

This is the creative domme in question – Toronto based Bastienne Cross. Should scat play not be your thing, she has a pretty wide variety of other interests.

On the Steps at Night

Right now I should be somewhere warm and sunny relaxing with friends. I’d planned a non-kinky but fun getaway for a few days post Thanksgiving. Unfortunately I’ve been hit by one of the seasonal viruses that love to show up this time of year. So I figured I’d rather be miserable at home than miserable travelling. Bleah!

While I head off to crawl under a duvet, I’ll leave you with a totally random image to enjoy. This is pretty much the opposite of warm and sunny and has zero to do with seasonal bugs. I just spotted it via this tweet and loved the atmosphere of the shot. I believe that’s Mistress Niko Flux and Mistress Sybil Fury, both pro-dommes based out of NYC.

The image was posted by Kareem Montes, who I assume is the photographer.  You can see more great work from her via her instagram.