Tag: Artwork

Complexity

I received a couple of fascinating comments from Michael on the recent subspace post I published. He concurred with my thoughts that his subspace felt different to the psychology definition of dissociation, but also described how  financial domination had triggered a reaction that did resemble the classical sense of dissociation as a detachment from reality. So prodding different bits of kinky wiring in his brain had triggered quantitatively different types of ‘subspace’ for him. I was trying to decide if subspace was more like X or Y, and it turns out it was both X and Y to the same person.

I think that’s an excellent reminder of the dangers of being too reductive when it comes to kink. There’s a tendency to try and categorize, box and label different activities and dynamics. I do it myself on this blog. Simplifying the world is the way we understand it, but it’s always important to keep in mind that you are simplifying, and reality is messy.

Kink is about power, sex, pleasure, control, fetishization, danger, risk, pain and relationships. You know, all the really simple stuff in life. It touches on our most primal instincts and our deepest emotional triggers. It’s hardly surprising that there are countless ways to experience it and although we may share common labels, we all may have slightly different interpretations of them. Be wary of people making absolute statements or asserting a universal kinky truth. I’m not sure there are any.

Weirdly I’m reminded of an old quote from a British football (soccer to the Yanks) manager called Bill Shanky who said that “Some people believe football is a matter of life and death, I am very disappointed with that attitude. I can assure you it is much, much more important than that.” If that’s true, then dare I add that kink might be even more important (and complex) than football?

In honor of Michael’s financial domination dabbling here’s a lovely piece of artwork from the ever brilliant Sardax.

The Houseguest

After publishing yesterday’s post it struck me that I couldn’t possibly feature predicament bondage and not also feature Augustine’s artwork. He’s the master of complex predicaments, often involving heavy medical elements.

On seeing this image, I was immediately reminded of Tyjord’s story ‘The Houseguest’. According to the stories page on Gaggedutopia, it was originally inspired by an Augustine drawing, so I’m guessing this is that drawing. I’m not sure if I should be proud that I made that connection or slightly ashamed at what strange things I have lurking in my brain. If I’d only used the brain cells I’ve dedicated to femdom data for financial planning, I could probably have retired by now.

Roleplay with an edge

Some people use BDSM to temporarily escape reality, while for others it’s a way of working through and exploring real world issues. I’m definitely in the escapist camp. I like to take a vacation from my overactive and constantly nagging brain by giving it a big wash of adrenaline and hormones. Being reminded of stuff that depresses me on a day to day basis is the last thing I want sneaking into my kink.

The people in this Broadly article clearly feel differently. The title sums it up pretty well – ‘Inside a BDSM Dungeon with a Hillary Dom and a Guilty, Diaper-Clad Trump Voter’. So on top of wall to wall political coverage in the media, you can now also politics in your local playspace. Assuming your local playspace is La Domaine Esemar that is.

The Domme in question is Mistress Couple (featured here in the past), who started offering a Hillary/Trump roleplay as joke before the election. When Trump won, and the joke became decidedly less funny, she continued with the twist that wannabe Trump submissives had to prove a donation to the ACLU or Planned Parenthood before a session.

I like the idea of generating money for a good cause and giving Mistress Couple the satisfaction of hitting a Trump voter in the nuts with a golf club. I just wish our politics wasn’t so fucked up that it’s ripe for being turned into BDSM role play material.

This street artwork, featuring Catwoman and Trump, is entitled ‘The revenge of women’ and is by Herr Nilsson.

It’s unlikely the ‘Mike’ featured in the Broadly article is a reader of this blog, but on the off chance he is, I’d just like to say: ‘Mike, you’re a goddamn idiot’.

Eyes bigger than your belly

The post title is a family expression from my childhood. It was used when someone had been greedy (i.e. me) and had loaded their dinner plate with more food than they could ultimately eat. I might have just done a similar thing in the kinky realm, although I’m not sure what the appropriate kinky equivalent would be. Libido bigger than your dick? Imagination writing checks your ass can’t cash?

I’m down in Los Angeles for a few days vacation. After a wet and relatively kink free Seattle winter, I wanted warmth and beatings. As is often the case when I travel, I was torn between playing with someone new and someone I know. Typically I like to play with people I know. Building a rapport with a domme over many sessions creates deeper and more intense experiences. It simplifies negotiation and makes it easier to relax and focus on the play, rather than trying to figure out a new dynamic. That said, there’s definitely something to be said for exploring new things with different people. It’s a great way to learn and grow. There’s no single right way to play, and I love watching how different dommes approach their craft.

So, as usual happens when I’m faced with a choice between A or B, I go with A and B. In fact, in this case it’s actually A and A and B and B. I’ve got 6 days vacation, 4 different sessions and 2 dommes. One with whom I’ve played multiple times in the past, and one who I’ve never met before. It’s very possible I’ve been excessively optimistic about my ability to take punishment. Particularly given my lack of match fitness these days. On the other hand, I can think of worse problems to have. If I don’t post here again, you can assume I died a happy man.

This gentleman doesn’t look all that happy, but he’s got cake and attractive attentive ladies. Not sure if his eyes were larger than his belly, but his dick certainly is. This is obviously by the talented Kami Tora.

Post MM

This is my 2000th post. I find that fact astonishing. I launched the blog in September of 2010, exactly 2395 days ago. That means I’ve average a post roughly ever 28 hours for the last 6 or so years. Putting it another way, estimating the average post to take 45 minutes, and assuming a standard 40 hour work week, I’ve spent just over 37 weeks on the full time job of blogging. As jobs go, it’s certainly a satisfying one, although the salary of negative several hundred dollars a year could be better.

Thanks to everyone who has commented on the blog, emailed me, linked to me, written posts I’ve shared or published images I’ve used. Thanks in particular to all my readers. If nobody ever showed up, I doubt I’d have made it to 200 posts, let alone 2000. I hope I’ve added a little kinky happiness into people’s lives over the years.

I’ll probably do some more follow-up thoughts in a subsequent post. For the moment I’m just going to bask in the achievement of making it this far. For my 1000th post I featured the artwork of the talented Yumine Guo. Let me continue that tradition in post 2000. I’m feeling pretty pleased at making it this far, and here’s a lady looking equally happy with herself.

If you like Yumine’s work then consider support her Patreon.

Behind the fantasy

Courtesy of linking from Mistress T I found this article on the rewards and challenges of being both a sex worker and a parent. I’ll admit it doesn’t really have a femdom angle to it. However, this blog relies heavily on the fantasies that sex workers help create. I feature beautiful photographs of sex workers, articles by them and descriptions of amazing scenes they help create. I therefore always appreciate the chance to acknowledge and humanize the people behind the fantasy.

I’ll add an entirely anecdotal observation of my own to the story. A lot of the pro-dommes I’ve interacted with have been very caring people and very pro-animal. They’ve kept animals, or fostered animals, or volunteered at shelters or contributed (and encouraged others to contribute) to animal charities. Obviously this is based on a very limited data set, but it does seem to me that pro-dommes at least, tend to care about animals and their welfare far more than the average person on the street does.

Of course there are always exceptions. There’s one type of animal they tend to do some really horrible things to.

This artwork is of course by the great Sardax.

When a switch marries a domme

I’m guessing from her expression, his desire is likely to go unfulfilled. Or maybe he can be the dominant one, just as long as he does exactly as he’s told.

This drawing for Playboy magazine is by the British cartoonist Francis Wilford Smith. According to his Wikipedia page he was a man of many talents. He did cartoons for Punch, Esquire and The New Yorker. He worked on advertising campaigns for major companies, wrote books on pin-up magazines and was a collector and expert on Blues and Gospel music.

Pegging Prep

Domina Victoria Rage has a published an updated version of her preparing for pegging post. It’s a handy guide on why you might want to do some preparatory cleaning and how best to achieve it.

I’ve been personally been surprised by the variation between dommes when it comes to planning anal play. Some send very specific and detailed instructions beforehand and then check they’ve been followed. Some have suggestions but aren’t prescriptive about it. Some either don’t seem to care or assume I’ll do what I think is necessary without being told. A few have even introduced pegging mid-scene with no previous planning or opportunity to prepare. So there’s clearly no single right approach here.

So far I’ve been generally lucky and, whatever the level of my pre-scene preparation, haven’t had any messy accidents. However, the idea of making a mess can definitely increase stress and make it harder to relax into the experience. So from that point of view, while I don’t think it’s always and absolutely necessary, I’m a fan of planning ahead when possible.

With a woman in an outfit this cute, it’d be a real shame to get it messy.

I’m afraid I don’t know the artist. The logo in the corner looks like a small toadstool or mushroom, but that doesn’t mean much to me. As usual, if you can help attribute, please leave a comment.

We apologize for the interruption

Sorry about the lack of posts recently. First it was my social life cutting into blogging time, then it was some stupid bug I picked up that I’m still fighting. Right now life is less sexy funtimes, more tissues and decongestant.

Hopefully I’ll be returning to full blogging strength very shortly. In the meantime, here’s some sexy artwork by Slippy. It’s called ‘Playdate‘.

If you like this work, it’s available to purchase at Society6.

Don’t try this at home

Here’s a striking image to continue the suspension theme. I think it falls into the category of ‘hot fantasy, but don’t try replicating it as shown.’ Hanging someone by rope like that is liable to cause all sorts of bad things to happen to their wrists and arms. Use proper suspension cuffs if you want to try this for real. The rest of us can simply enjoy the artwork and the exciting fantasy it may provoke.

This is by the Brazilian artist Pote. He has a lot more artwork available on his blog, although most of it is Mm rather than Fm.