Heading South

Much as I love the Pacific Northwest, the first few months of the year can be pretty depressing. It’s damp, cold and grey. That means it’s therefore time for paltego to head south and catch some Californian sun and kink. I’m going to be in Los Angeles for the next few days, sitting by the pool and meeting up with some great LA dommes. Posting may be a touch more erratic than usual, depending how heavily I hit the cocktail bars.

While I’m trying to find my suitcase, I’ll leave you with this image from Brazilian photographer Fabio DaMotta. I found it via this Vice article on him. I personally love this combination of art, decoration and bondage. It’s both beautiful and objectifying in the best possible way.

Vintage Breathplay

It’s rare to see this activity in a vintage shot. Corporal punishment and bondage is fairly common in older shots, and medical play not unheard of, but I can’t recall seeing breathplay before.

It makes me smile, as it’s an activity I love. I particularly like the eye contact they are making, as that’s a key part of any breathplay scene for me. People talk about power exchange as an abstract D/s concept, but breathplay creates a focus that crystallizes that exchange. The power over someone’s breath is literally life and death. If I’m giving that up then I want that other person to be very much in that moment with me.

I found this image via this tweet.

Puppy Dog Eyes

I’ve remarked before that a strong love of animals seems to be a common trait among pro-dommes. I suspect it’s actually a common trait for sex workers in general, but my personal experience obviously skews towards dommes.

It’s therefore a smart move for the submissive here – who I think is Deviant Kade – to deploy the puppy dog eyes in a search for sympathy. It doesn’t appear to be working all that well, but you’ve got to give him full marks for the effort.

This is obviously from the Captive Male site.

Strange Comfort

I’ve been in a bondage frame of mind recently. I think it’s the cold weather. There’s something comforting and relaxing about certain types of bondage. Almost like being gently hugged. That sense of relaxing into an embrace, with no further thought being necessary. Some people like to avoid the chill by cuddling in front of a roaring fire. Others tilt towards layers of rope, tight leather straps and isolation hoods. I think my dream scenario would be to combine the two, with heavy bondage and cuddling in front of a roaring fire. I really need to make that happen someday.

This image is by the artist Harry B, sourced via this tweet.

Unexpected Juxtaposition

I had one of those odd moments today where my kinky world and my regular world briefly crossed streams. I was waiting for my afternoon coffee while flipping through mainstream sites on my phone and totally not prepared for Mistress An Li to pop up in an opinion piece on a videogame site. 

The article in question is this one, and it’s a well written piece on the sexiness of the 2019 game Control. Sexiness in videogames is obviously nothing new, but in this case it’s less about the appearance of the protagonist and more about her confidence, power and mastery of her environment. That leads the writer into a BDSM connection and in turn to interviewing and quoting Mistress An Li (someone I sessioned with last year). I think the article does a great job of connecting all the dots together in a meaningful way, and not simply using a pro-domme or BDSM as clickbait. I was left surprised, impressed and with a desire to go play the game.

This image is from Mistress An Li’s instagram. You can also find her here on twitter and visit her professional site here

SMpedia

Fans of Japanese BDSM may want to check out SMpedia. Based on a machine translation of their front page it’s ‘a non-profit database established to accurately convey the process of the birth and development of post-war Japanese SM culture to future generations.’ I have absolutely zero ability to read Japanese, but the modern browser translate tools seem to do a pretty good job to convey the gist of its pages. There is an English language version known as Nawapedia, but there’s a lot less content and it doesn’t appear to be being updated.

The artwork below is from the site and by 小悪征夫, which Google translate as Yukio Koaku.

There is also a twitter feed for the site, which is where I spotted this image.

Santa

It’s that time of year again. If you celebrate Christmas then I hope you have a good one. If you don’t, then I apologize for all the nonsense around it. If the holiday time is tough for you then I empathize and commiserate. Thankfully we’ll all be past it soon.

I found this article on the origin of Santa and Father Christmas interesting. I hadn’t realized that there were two separate figures involved and that Saint Nicholas was the patron saint of sex workers. On an entirely unrelated note, I’ve also enjoyed the #duvetknowitschristmas tag on twitter, which reminds me why I like staying at home over Christmas and not dealing with weird family arrangements.

Finally, here’s a nice bondage image from Thee Domasan to finish the post. What a well placed Santa hat.

Heading Towards the Light

For anyone fed up with dark winter nights and holiday festivities, there is good news. In the Northern Hemisphere we just passed the Winter Solstice. That means we’ve turned the corner and are heading back towards lighter times. In just a few days all the holiday nonsense will be over and the days will slowly start getting longer.

Mistress Fox and her submissive marked the Solstice with this beautiful bondage scene. As you might guess, the petals were then beaten off him.

Mistress Fox is a NYC based pro-domme. I can’t find a website for her, but her twitter bio contains contact details for anyone interested in arranging a session.

Use Your Words (revisited)

My safeword post from last week generated a number of thoughtful comments. The general consensus seemed to be that simple open communication was a good way to go and that safewords didn’t need to be particularly original.

poe2600 raised the interesting point that most submissives are very resistant to using safewords, even when they probably should. I think there’s a good deal of truth in that, although there always exceptions. I remember one pro-domme telling me about a client who she call the traffic light guy. He thought he should accompany their entire session with a constant stream of  ‘green… green… yellow… green… yellow… red! red!… yellow.’ Needless to say that wasn’t exactly conducive to a good D/s dynamic. Exceptions aside, I think it is true that there’s a natural inclination to try and avoid breaking the flow of play with a safeword. Which makes for another good reason to use your words and communicate in a more graduated and subtle way than a simple go/stop approach.

The trickiest situations for me are those where I see a possible problem arising later in the session and have to make a judgement call on when or if to call it out earlier. Typically this is when complex bondage and layered sensations are involved. For example, playing in NYC earlier this year I had a situation involving some particularly painful nipple clamps, a straitjacket and a lot of leather straps. Nipple clamps are usually painful going on and off, but become numb when on. These were not reacting like that. The pain was high and not diminishing, but it wasn’t yet at my stop point. However, the domme was about to tighten the straitjacket over them and I could see a lot of leather straps ready to go around it. Adjusting the clamps when they were hidden under all those layers would be a significant undertaking.

My solution in these situations is always the same – given the domme the information and leave the decision to her. I might be misreading her plan and adjusting later will be easier than I expect. Or she might prefer to push on and deal with any adjustments if it becomes necessary. In this case I told her that they were intense and bearable for a short period, but possibly not something I could handle over an extended period. She then elected to swap them for a different pair before pulling all the bondage into place. The remainder of the session then unfolded flawlessly.

These situations are always tricky because they’re not a simple binary choice. I also don’t want to be another traffic light guy and overload the domme with feedback. It’s ultimately a judgement call based on the the likelihood of needing to adjust something and how difficult it looks like that adjustment will become.

I’m fairly certain this shot of bondage and nipple torture is of Domina Yuki. That’s not me in the photo, but I’ve done a very similar scene in that space.