The beauty of dominant women
I don’t think this rather sexy image needs any additional commentary from me. Which is probably fortunate, as it’s some ungodly early hour in the morning and I really should go to bed. Apparently in any one evening I can either cook a fancy meal or write a decent length blog post, but not both.
This is by Lilith Darkmoon, a pro-domme based out of the Netherlands.
Bastinado is one of those things that doesn’t seem to scary until you try it, at which point it rapidly shifts into the horribly fucked up and disturbing category. It’s pretty much the opposite of something like sounding. That looks scary, but when you eventually do find someone to stick a metal rod down your urethra, it’s actually fine. Almost pleasant even. That’s definitely not the case with foot punishment.
Beatings on the ass or thighs can be very painful, but there’s something simple about them. Lots of muscle, thick bones and layers of fat. In contrast the foot has 26 small bones and 33 joints all packed into a relatively small space. That creates a complex series of nerve ending packed surfaces, where the sensations can vary dramatically from blow to blow. Whenever my feet are beaten I always have the vision of little bones cracking and breaking, which frankly freaks me out. Of course the human body is a lot tougher than it looks, and no sane scene will ever get anywhere that kind of point. Feet can absorb a lot of punishment. Unfortunately my imagination refuses to believe that. Stupid imagination .
This image features Mistress Baton and was taken from this tweet. The little bit of tape fixing his big toes together is a particularly devilish touch. If you’d like to enjoy a beating from Mistress Baton in person, then her tour schedule is here.
Rolling Stone magazine has an interesting article on waterboarding as a kink. It features Elise Graves, the bondage aficionado I played with and posted about last week.
Waterboarding is certainly a more extreme kink, although I think its intensity can vary dramatically depending on how it’s done. I actually experienced it a couple of times a few years back, but not in an inverted position and not with a huge amount of water. I was basically horizontal and could lift my head slightly, which meant the water tended to drain away from my nose and mouth. I suspect that makes a big difference to the degree of terror induced. The coldness of the water triggered the mammalian diver reflex, which combined with bondage and a D/s dynamic created quite an unusual and intense headspace.
It’s a kink I could never have indulged in during the years when America was actually using the technique to torture prisoners. That’s not entirely logical – what I did in a Seattle playspace had no bearing on what the government did thousands of miles away – but it felt wrong and immoral to get sexual kicks from something that was being used in such a horrible way. When I did eventually try a lightweight version of it, years after Obama banned its usage on prisoners, we still avoided any kind of interrogation dynamic or roleplay. That seemed too close to a terrible reality.
Of course water and cloth is just one way to take someones breath away. As this Rodzo artwork shows, there are other options.
Bondage virtuoso Elise Graves has been in Seattle for the last few days. Primarily she was here to shoot for House of Gord, but she did reserve time for a couple of private sessions, and I was lucky enough to score one of them. A lovely mix of whipping, electrical play and bondage was the result. We didn’t get pictures, but fortunately for me, she did shoot them in her other session, as shown here. I’m not sure who the other Seattle submissive is, but my thanks to him for these shots. He appears to be doing a better job of handling the rope suspension than I did.
Rope isn’t normally my favored bondage medium. I realized today that a big part of that is the time it often takes. When I’ve limited time to play, and I’m paying by the hour, I somewhat resent burning a lot of the session getting into and out of bondage. The process can be enjoyable, but not as enjoyable as what comes afterward. Fortunately, with an expert like Elise, that becomes far less of an issue. I’ve played with a lot of word class dommes, but I think she’s the fastest rigger I’ve ever experienced. She very quickly pulled together well balanced positions, with just the right degree of stress.
Elise’s smile in this image is very indicative of the way she plays. There was a lot of happy positive energy in our scene today. This image is from her Bondage Liberate site. I found it via her twitter feed.
I think one might fairly say that this image is not particularly low in temperature. Indeed, it might even tend towards warmth. Significant heat should not be put entirely out of the question. Or, as Troy Orleans more succinctly put it, “jfc this is hot”.
It’s from a tweet from the Steelwerks Extreme team.
On the face of it, this article about a poker player experiencing sensory deprivation to win a bet has nothing to do with femdom. However, I’m linking to it because sensory deprivation is definitely a kink and the hallucinations he experienced actually reminded me of some of my own experiences with that particular kink.
I’ve always been limited to a couple of hours of reduced senses, rather the days he went through. On the other hand, I mix in heavy bondage, pain and breath control, which certainly ups the intensity of the experience. A couple of times in the state I had a sense of space opening up around me, my consciousness drifting in a large dark void, with spinning yellow stars moving around me and away from me. In hindsight I’m surprised I didn’t freak out, particularly given that sensory deprivation is a pretty tough scene for me to handle at the best of times. I think I intuitively knew, much like the poker player in the article, that embracing the vision and relaxing into it was the key to handling it. If memory serves me correctly, it only lasted a short period before I was quickly snapped back to reality by the domme electrocuting my testicles. That’s always guaranteed to capture a man’s attention.
This image is from Lady Hinako. From her blog and twitter feed she’s clearly an expert at heavy bondage and sensory deprivation scenes. I particularly like the contrast in this image between the cute doll like figure and the obvious immobilization and sensory restriction the man inside is experiencing.
This is some seasonally appropriate bondage from Princess Devi. You can see the reverse angle in her original tweet here. The framing adds a slight fairy tale element to the shot. I wonder, mirror mirror on the wall, who is the kinkiest of them all?
It’s damp and cold in Seattle right now, which makes these recent shots by Lady Hinako and Jordyn Fox particularly appealing. I love their smiles in the first image.
I’m currently being inundated with Christmas cards featuring happy families in amazing locations. It used to be that Christmas cards were generic shots of Santa, stables, mangers, stars and holly. The card was generic but the the message personal. Now cards seem to be a physical version of Instagram, customized with photographs that emphasize what a fabulous lifestyle all my friends have. The cards are less greetings and more tribal markers of success. I think next year I’m going to arrange some personal images like this for my cards. You send me shots of your rugrats frolicking on a Caribbean beach, and I’ll send you shots of me in bondage, getting fucked up by gorgeous women in leather. If you want to highlight how well you’re doing at life, I think it’s only fair that I get to do the same in my own peculiar way. Or we could all switch back to Santa, holly and wreaths. I’m OK either way.
After all that recent verbiage on kinky thought experiments, I think its time to get back to some basic femdom. This image is by the Los Angeles based Mark Dektor. He has an exhibition called ‘Switch’ that has just started at the Artist Corner Gallery in LA. As Isabella Sinclaire posted via her Instagram, he manages to create an amazing representation of the kinky world. Plus, he has shots of the fabulous Nina Hartley, which I think makes it instantly better than any other art exhibit, kinky or otherwise, that foolishly chooses to leave her out.
This is from this instagram post by Mark Dektor, and features Guerin Swing and Aine Patrick.
I spotted a few pro-dommes suggesting that tumblr blocking porn might be a good thing, as it’d remove a source of free porn and push more people to buy from content creators. That’s an interesting thought, and it’s hard to know how these kind of changes will play out, but it does seem to miss some aspects of the bigger picture. Firstly, tumblr was also used by sex workers to advertise and attract clients. With it gone, the only social media site still friendly to sex workers is twitter. That’s a precarious situation to be in. Secondly, I think the broader internet ecosystem for kinky content has helped dramatically increase the potential audience for kink.
It’s tempting to divide the world into kinky and vanilla people. In reality I think there are three groups. There’s obviously those who have zero interest in it and those who’ll always be active in it. In the middle, and possibly the largest group, are the potential kinksters. For these people the broad availability of kinky imagery and writing is a gateway. It draws them in with fantasies and ideas that they didn’t realize was their ‘thing’ until they saw it. Seeing someone act out their kinks normalizes the idea of trying your own.
I’d actually put myself in that middle category. I think I’ve always been kinky, even before I knew what sex or BDSM was, but I’m not sure I’d have ever truly discovered or explored my kinks without the internet. I couldn’t have imagined broaching the topic with a partner or calling an unknown pro-domme from a card in a phonebox. It was porn that expanded my imagination and kinky bloggers that made me realize that this was something I could try out for real.
Obviously tumblr removing adult content is not the same as it being removed from the internet. However, it was the largest and most user friendly of the porn hosting platforms. The more porn is pushed into the unfriendly corners of the internet, and the more it’s suppressed by search tools, the fewer conversions I think we’ll see from potential kinksters to actual kinksters. Which means fewer potentially kinky partners and fewer clients for pro-dommes.
These photographs are a great example of the kind of thing we risk losing. This is from Misingui’s tumblr, which features a lot of equally wonderful images. These two are from this post. Rigging is by Misungui, the model is Stan Briche and the photographer is Ludovica Anzaldi.