Bondage – Page 32 – Femdom Resource

One careful kinky owner

I received an email the other day asking advice on selling bondage furniture. Somebody had a large item they wanted to sell and wasn’t sure where to do so. They didn’t think eBay or Craigslist were suitable. I’ve never actually faced this problem so I couldn’t help. Instead I thought I’d throw the problem to my readers. Where do people sell BDSM furniture? Do the standard sites deal OK with kinky items? Are there any specialized alternatives? Feel free to leave a comment if you’ve experience in this area.

For an image I thought I’d feature a scene with an amazing amount of fancy equipment. This looks like a kinky mad scientist raided a 50’s film set and a modern fetish store. Judging by the white plastic chair, a garden supply store also featured in the shopping spree. The lovely lady is Mistress Eleise De Lacy from the Femme Fatale Films site.

An ending

This has been a depressing week for me for a number of reasons. Some of those I can’t share here, but the one I can share is a big one: Lydia is retiring. Regular readers will be aware that Lydia is the domme I’ve played with for years and has been a big part of my development both as a person and as a submissive. I’ve documented a small fraction of our play on this blog (for example here, here, here and many more). Amazingly she was actually the first pro-domme I ever played with, almost 6 years ago now, and we’ve got together for 2-3 hours every couple of weeks ever since then. Hearing that she planned to retire, and possibly leave Seattle, wasn’t entirely surprising but it really shook me up.

From a purely selfish and practical perspective I’m going to miss the joy of playing with her. She’s without doubt the most talented domme I’ve ever interacted with. In what is literally hundreds of sessions that we’ve done together, I can’t think of one time where it felt like we were repeating something or simply going through the motions. Every time I stepped out of my clothes, and went to meet her naked and smiling, it was the beginning of something magical. Certain activities formed common starting points – piercing, corporal, bondage, breathplay – but each time she’d take our play in some new exciting direction.

Emotionally it has hit me pretty hard. Partly because I’m not sure how to process it. I’m not someone who ever had a problem with the professional boundary. I’m not saying I’d have turned down the chance to make it a non-professional relationship, but that was never anything I expected or particularly hoped for. I just enjoyed the relationship for what it was. Now its ending I don’t have a natural way to move through the change. I end other professional relationships all the time, but my realtor or doctor hasn’t spent hundreds of hours with me in very intimate and intense sexual situations. The closest analogy I can draw is to losing a very close friend. Someone important to you and who knew you in a way nobody else did, is suddenly no longer going to be in your life.

Fortunately there a few weeks left before she hangs up her whip (as a professional at least), and I have the chance to play with her a couple more times. It’ll be kind of strange. I almost didn’t want to play again at all. But given all the fun we’ve had together, it seemed like it’d be silly not to enjoy our last opportunity. I’ve never yet cried in a session, no matter how hard the beating. I’ll be kind of ironic if I end up crying when the beating stops.

Shibari

Hunting around online led me to more great images from the photographer from yesterday’s post. She’s Amaury Grisel and her tumblr has a wonderful collection of Shibari images on it. Most of the erotic imagery I post here I wouldn’t want to share beyond my circle of readers. Her tumblr contains the kind of images I’d like to show non-kinky friends to demonstrate just how beautiful kink can sometimes be.

Suspension

Here’s some beautiful ropework to start the week. When I was young and naive I used to think that whips and canes were serious stuff and bondage was relatively easy. Experience has led me to reverse that opinion. It takes great skill to rig this kind of shot and serious physical ability to model for it.

The rope is by Gestalta, the model is bishop.black and the photographer was Amaury Grisel. I originally found it here.

Ivy & Harley

Important breaking news – two fictional comic book characters are now dating. The long rumored relationship between Harley Quinn and Poison Ivy has now been confirmed from multiple sources. Forget all those other blogs bringing you helpful advice on BDSM, nuanced relationship advice or sharing deeply personal experiences of kink. Reality is for losers. Stick to this one for all the important breaking stories on fictional characters.

I’ve actually featured these two in one or two posts in the past. Kink often seems to crop up in their stories, so facetiousness aside, I do think this is a potentially fun development that may lead to some entertaining storylines.

The artwork above features Batman with Poison Ivy and is by the artist Otto Schmidt.

Feeling happy

I played with Lydia tonight. Much bondage, breathplay, nipple torture, hot wax and flogging was involved. It was the kind of play that gets me spacey almost immediately. The kind where I can channel the pain through a sense of shared connection. The kind where it hurts but feels so good and so right.

Right now all I want to do is collapse on the couch and drink wine, so this post will be short. I’ll simply share an image that captures an element of what play can be. There was no rope bondage in my case (although lots of leather belts and plastic wrap) but this has that sense of tension and connection that means so much to me.

I’m afraid I don’t have an original source for this. I found it via the Alternative Femdom tumblr.

Hommage

I find it slightly disturbing when I make connections between femdom artists, photographers or performers. Being an expert on pre-raphaelite painting or the films of Ingmar Bergman (for example) would typically be seen a source of pride. Recognizing a particular pro-domme from a random tumblr photograph, knowing the dungeon it was taken in and figuring out the publisher from the style of shot, is a somewhat less marketable skill.

The artwork below is entitled ‘Her Kinky Wishes‘ and is by ashfaq-ayon. It’s a lovely drawing, but on seeing it I immediately recognized the inspiration of Rodzo’s work. It’s a very different artistic style, but the composition, text and set-up is pure Rodzo. I like it a lot, although I think the more realistic style makes the male posture look even more impossible than in the original inspiration.

Nantaimori

Here’s some sushi to finish our tasting menu of food related posts. I’ve seen plenty of articles about eating sushi off naked women, but never anything on using naked men. Apparently it does exist and even has its own name – Nantaimori. Never let it be said this blog isn’t educational.

The artwork below is by the artist Voloh. You can see more of his work at the Hentai Foundry (click through the warning splash screen).

D is not an evolution of s

As I was writing yesterday’s post on La Domaine Esemar I had a nagging feeling it was a subject I’d covered before. Searching past posts didn’t find anything, but my bookmark list turned up this article from The Daily Beast. It’s an article I’d intended to post about but never got around to. It’s similar to the Cosmos article, giving background on the people and the Chateau, but provides a lot more detail and context. It’s certainly an interesting article, but there’s one really infuriating part in it.

This deep-seeded dedication to submission, and potential subsequent evolution into dominance, is one of the ways that La Domaine sets itself apart from the commercialized BDSM scene in New York City. People are encouraged to experience both sides, traditionally starting as a submissive and moving into a dominant role, to more fully understand the symbiotic nature of the lifestyle, whereas in other parts of the subculture people will adhere to one or the other for superficial reasons rather than trying, over time, to explore the inner-workings of their sexuality and come to a honest consensus about their true nature as a submissive or a dominant.

Firstly, dominance is not an evolution of submission. The two states are peers and partners. One is not a more advanced lifeform than the other. Secondly, the idea that it’s necessary to explore both sides to fully understand one’s true sexual nature is ludicrous. Are straight people superficial if they don’t first explore same sex relationships? Or have gay people not reached a honest consensus about themselves if they haven’t tried sleeping with someone of the opposite sex? If someone is curious or just uncertain then by all means explore. People’s desires can change and knowledge is a wonderful thing. D/s is not necessarily a binary choice, but some people know deep in their bones what works for them. The above quote smacks of ‘one true path’ bullshit and BDSM hierarchies, and that always drives me nuts.

The above image is Mistress Couple with a slave at La Domaine Esemar.

Idiocy on idiocy

After writing yesterday’s post on the stupid British porn laws, I spotted this page by Megara Furie on the issue of minors accessing content. Apparently the issue is that the widely used Clips 4 Sale site accepts debit cards. Credit cards require proof of age, but anyone can get a prepaid debit card. That effectively means that no UK producer can use the number one clips site in the world. There are alternatives (for example Clips Fatale), but I suspect the other sites don’t see anywhere near the same volume of traffic.

I can see this is clearly a major problem. I’m sure that many minors are saving up their pocket money in order to sneakily acquire debit cards and then pay for pornography. There’s absolutely no way they’d be going off to the completely free and anonymous sites like redtube or xvideos or pornhub. Minors are also notoriously bad and nervous about using modern technology, so there’s no chance there’d be getting porn from one of the zillions of illegal but free torrent sites out there.

Quite frankly if anyone did find a minor paying for porn he (or she) should get an award for their honesty (after taking the porn away). I can only hope the idiots at ATVOD organization never stumble across any of the more potent Japanese femdom material. It might melt their tiny little brains. There’s all sorts of extreme whipping, breathplay and toilet scenes. None of which is now allowed in Britain. The image below is from the Rinryu site which (fair warning) containing heavy material featuring all three of those activities.