Getting it all wrong

When a story about a dominatrix avoiding jail after a client died in a session originally surfaced in my inbox, I was pleased. Not for the dead guy obviously, but for the fact that she hadn’t been unreasonably punished. From just reading the article title I assumed he’d had a heart attack or aneurysm and gone out doing something he enjoyed. Intense kinky sex can certainly raise stress and blood pressure levels, and having a play partner die would be traumatizing enough without adding legal entanglements. Now, having read the story, I’m not so sure. Jail seems like a pretty reasonable place for her.

The client contacted her to do breathplay, which is a reasonable thing in itself. The badness starts with him wanting to be made unconscious. It gets worse with the fact she agreed to do it when clearly neither of them had a clue what they were doing. It culminates with her helping him use tape and a noose to cut off his breathing and then leaving him alone in a hotel room for 30 minutes. Leaving someone alone is a big red flag in most bondage situations, let alone when breathing restrictions are involved. Stupidity like that really deserves some prison time, even if he was equally idiotic in instigating the situation.

Personally, I love breathplay. I’ve had some of my most intense sessions while experiencing it. But it was always with people who knew what they were doing, who kept a very close watch on my physical responses and where we could escape it in a second or two.

breathplayThis is the lovely Mistress Eleise – someone who definitely does know how to do breathplay properly. A gloved hand can be very effective all on its own. This is taken from her Femme Fatale Films.

Patreon

I noticed when writing my previous post that Yumine has set-up a Patreon account. For those that haven’t encountered this service before, it’s an easy way for fans (patrons) of artists to contribute a few bucks to them on a regular basis. It’s not designed to crowdfund a specific piece of work, but instead functions more as a virtual tip jar for ongoing work. Yumine is suggesting chipping in just a $1 or $5 per month.

I’ve not used Patreon before, but this seemed a worthwhile case to give it a go. Sign-up was very quick and easy, and it let me use either PayPal or a credit card. If like me, you appreciate Yumine’s work, then maybe give it a shot yourself?

calmOf course this gives me another excuse to feature her work in a post. I particularly like this piece as the D/s dynamic and activity reminds me a lot of my play. I love breathplay and nipple torture, while having a love/hate relationship with hoods. That often leads to a lot of nervous energy that has to be worked through.

Eric Kroll

A few weeks back I featured a photograph from the erotic and fetish photographer Eric Kroll. By odd coincidence, just a short while later, I came across this ErosBlog post on a GoFundMe page for Eric. He’s trying to keep his enormous collection of material together and keep a roof over his head. I’ve a real soft spot for old school erotic/fetish photographers who worked in the pre-internet days, and I suspect a number of my readers feel the same way. If you do then maybe consider contributing to his GoFundMe. As an added bonus, any donation over $30, gets you a signed print from Eric.

The image below was taken by Eric and features the famous domme Isabella Sinclair with submissive Lystra, taken from this sequence.

Isabella Sinclair chokes Lystra for my camera

A dangerous game (and woof!)

This image contains many staples of femdom erotica. There’s bondage, breathplay, a naked man and a lady in stockings. The text is a little more poetic than the usual captions, but it’s hard to argue with the spirit of it given the noose around his neck. But what’s with the dog? Which artist thought that the perfect addition to an edgy bondage and breathplay scenario was a cute and fuzzy little dog? I kind of feel the image is part of a larger sequence that would explain what’s going on, but I’m afraid I’ve failed to track down any other context for this.

DangerousGame

Breathe, breathe in the air

I haven’t posted about my personal play in recent months. Sadly the reason for that is a simple one – there hasn’t been any. Since Lydia retired (almost 12 months ago now), I’ve struggled to reach out and make new connections. The reasons for that probably deserve their own post, and I’m not going to dig into that further right now.

The reason I mention this at all is the image below. If I had to pick one thing I’ve missed it’s breath play. Piercing play would probably be a close second. These are two things I never had much interest in prior to trying them, but quickly grew to be some of my favorite activities. I love the contrast of expressions in the shot below. The domme really looks to be enjoying the moment.

Breathe

Where do they get those wonderful toys?

The Kink studios may not quite be Batman (ref here), but they do seem to have a greater array of fancy bondage furniture than anyone else out there. Maybe there are some Japanese studios that rival them, but I’d be surprised. Great gear of course doesn’t necessarily make a great scene, but I think it’s always fun to see a fancy new toy and imagine playing with it. I’ve been in some very well equipment dungeons, but none of them had a full body dunk tank.

This is from Men in Pain and features Miss Brooke, Lucy Lee and Diablo. I was amazed to see it’s from back in 2004.

DunkTank1

DunkTank2

Enthusiastic consent

Gawker has published one of the better articles I’ve seen recently in the mainstream press on sex and kink. Entitled ‘Vanilla Sex: A Perfectly Fine Way to Fuck‘ its message was to avoid trying to categorize sex and instead concentrate on discussion. What matters is what you and your partner(s) want, not some arbitrary definition of normality. It finishes with fine advice applicable to almost any sexual situation…

And that, I think, is what’s missing from vanilla sex. Rather than trying to “spice up” your love life with imported sexual practices that don’t fit your tastes, why not borrow kink culture’s emphasis on dialogue and enthusiastic consent? The hottest move your sex life can steal from kink isn’t handcuffs, it’s discussion
From a Gawker article by Monica Heisey

It’s tricky to pick an image to represent the concept of enthusiastic consent, so here’s a couple who at least look happy and enthusiastic about what they’re doing. Plus, if you’re going to do breathplay like this, consent is pretty important.

Breathplay

This is from the Hom Smother site. I found it on the Felm Cyber tumblr.

In the tank

Here’s my final water themed post for the foreseeable future. Seattle has now returned to its traditional rain and, more significantly, I’ve run out of interesting water images to feature.

I like this combination of heavy chains and water. There’s a nice duality to the idea of chains as both bondage and a weight pulling him under. The big glass tank is also pretty cool. I really think kinky porn studios should invest more in unusual equipment and visual impressive scenes. Regular movies range from intimate character driven dramas through to crazy over-the-top special effect extravaganzas. In contrast most porn is somewhere between an Adam Sandler comedy and a Will Ferrell comedy. i.e. Middle of the road crap to middle of the road occasionally good. I’m not going to hold my breath for the porn version of a Jim Jarmusch movie, but surely creating a visually striking Luc Besson equivalent is not beyond the wit of a big kink studio.

In the tankThis is obviously a Divine Bitches shoot. I believe it feature Wolf Hudson and Mistress Isis. It’s not often you see a swimmer’s nose clip in a porn shoot.

Bobbing for apples

It continues to be about eleventeen bajillion degrees in Seattle (apologies if my highly scientific terms are too confusing). It has also been a couple of weeks since I did anything kinky. Or at least anything kinky involving another person. Having my portable fan topple onto the bed when I was jerking off almost qualified as CBT, but coming close to inadvertent circumcision by domestic appliance isn’t really a fetish of mine.

This excess of heat and dearth of kink is making me antsy and grouchy. I realize there are now many kink deprived readers from hot parts of the world cursing at their monitors after having read that. As problems go it’s not the worst one to have, but it’s my blog, and I’ll whine if I want to.

As for posts, I’m therefore maintaining the hunt for cool refreshing femdom. This one from Divine Bitches is an intriguing but odd image. I like the fountain, but why the head first dunk? He looks like he’s playing the old Halloween game of bobbing for apples. Perhaps she has thrown his chastity key in there?

Femdom DunkI found this on the Femdom Times site.

A refreshing dip

It’s insanely warm in Seattle right now. At least by the local standards. My apartment temperature control claims it’s 83F, and that’s at 2:30 in the morning. So while this image might typically be seen to be an intense type of breathplay, right now to me it looks like a very refreshing dip. I could really use someone shoving my head into an icy tub of water.

Refreshing dip

As the not particularly subtle watermark suggests, this is from Mistress Kawa. She’s a Spanish based Mistress. I found it via the Felm Cyber tumblr.