Tag: F

This planet is having a pretty bloody time of it

The news these days is generally not good. One might even go as far as saying it’s seriously fucked up. Even this blog, designed as a kinky oasis, has featured a fair number of depressing posts about laws and politics. I’m therefore very happy to report a minor but cheering feelgood story. New Zealand’s Catherine Healy, who helped decriminalize prostitution, has been recognized  in the Queen’s honors list.  Specifically, she has been made a a Dame Companion of the New Zealand Order of Merit for services to the rights of sex workers.

When I first spotted the headline, I assumed it’d be a situation where she’d done several good things, and she just happened to be someone who’d also worked for decriminalization. But that doesn’t seem to be the case. She’s being recognized primarily for her work towards decriminalization. In a world where regressive and punitive legislation seems the new norm, have a sex worker recognized by the ultimate establishment figure of the Queen is a happy twist. Congratulations to Catherine and whoever nominated her.

A lot of pro-dommes own thrones and cherry pick some of the trappings of royalty. However, it’s tough to beat a thousand years of inbreeding and faith in a divine right. The shot below shows Mistress Ezada Sinn on her throne. It’s a pretty impressive one, but not quite up to Sovereign’s Throne in the House of Lords. Now that’d be a great location to play out a worship scene.

Five bonus points for anyone who knows where the post title came from.

Letting Go

I typically don’t like to link to articles that are surfacing via my blogroll. It seems lazy on my part, since they’re already available to anyone who is interested. However, a new post by Ms. Renee Trevi, entitled ‘A Session With No Map‘ is too good not to feature. It describes the kind of intensity I strive for but only occasionally touch.

He is quietly breathing and I read in his eyes that he gave it up entirely. I feel him fully dissolved, like there is nothing left of him, completely disintegrated. There is a sense of deep surrender in his eyes, he is neither scared of pain nor desiring of pleasure. And that’s when we slow down.

There’s sometimes a moment for me, deep in a session, where everything inverts. The pain has been driving me inward, focusing me on my sensations, my emotions. Then I reach a point, not of giving up, but of letting go. The energy turns outwards and it becomes about Her. It’s a sense of acceptance. The pain is still there, but it’s just information, something that I can release to her. I might be experiencing it, but she owns it. We’re in a bubble and everything else is noise.

As I said, I don’t often get there, but when I do, it’s way better than anything as straightforward as an orgasm. I think Ms Renee Trevi’s post captures the intensity of that kind of moment beautifully, and I love how she tackled the open ended nature of the session she describes.

Ms Renee Trevi is a NYC based pro-domme. If you’re interested in experiencing her skills for yourself, her session page is here.

Pooh’s Hole

I stumbled across a post today that made me laugh and feel bad all at the same time. Obviously, in those circumstances, the only logical thing to do is share it with thousands of people – so here you go.

The bad part comes from linking anal sex to beloved childhood classic. As a child I never watched the Disney version of Winnie-the-Pooh, but I loved and read repeatedly the original books that featured illustrations by E. H. Shephard. I’m not sure I’ll ever be able to remember this particular chapter in quite the same way again.

On the funny side, I think it does capture some of the varying emotions of anal sex. I’ve had a few dicks in my time, and a lot of more strap-ons, and it can definitely be a roller-coaster of sensations. There are moments of “OMG! This is awesome!” The occasional “Ouch! Jeez. Not like that.” And of course the dreaded “Uh-oh..what just happened down there? I hope that’s lube…”

I’ll leave you with what seems like an appropriate image in the context of the original link. Although I guess this is more appropriate for a Piglet than a Pooh.

There’s no watermark, but I believe this is Mistress Silver, a UK based pro-domme. She has a professional site here and a twitter feed here.

Splashproof

There’s a lot to dislike about this image. It’s got the classic 70’s domme stare, the limp whip holding and the collar that’d be better suited to a submissive. Not to mention the weird crossed swords behind her. Who ever though that fake medieval weapons were a good look for a room?

On the plus side, her boots, gloves and natural beauty do make it work. However, what really sold me on it was the fetishistic apron-like dress. There’s something both disturbing and sexy about that. What’s going to spurt, splash or squirt that she needs protection from? And not just a small amount of protection. That’s a waist to heel cover. She’s ready for things to get seriously messy.

International Sex Worker Day

June 2nd is International Sex Worker Day. In the light of the FOSTA/SESTA bill passed in the US, it takes on even more significance this year. I’m a bit late with this post to encourage people to attend the various marches that have been happening in major cities, but it’s never too late to show your support.

Some of you may be thinking that you’ve never hired a sex worker, so this isn’t your issue. You’d be wrong. Almost all the sexy images and movies on the internet feature sex workers of some sort. All those images that tumblr is packed with and the movies on the various tube sites is created and taken (usually without consent) from sex workers. This blog wouldn’t exist without sex workers. They feature in the majority of the images I post, they’re the sources for a lot of the links I feature and my interactions with them trigger the thoughts I share. They give society so much and in return, they get marginalized, persecuted and prosecuted.

The simplest thing you can do to support sex workers is to purchase their services. If you like porn, then buy it. There’s a ton of independently produced femdom material for sale at places like this or this. If you want something a little more personal, then maybe order a custom clip? A lot of dommes will make them (for example here, here, here and many more). If you’ve ever considered hiring a pro-domme or escort then go for it. Be polite, clean and pay what’s asked and I predict you’ll have a great time. If you can’t meet in person, then consider using something like niteflirt or OnlyFans. Many of the dommes I talk about here use those services (e.g. Domina Yuki, Mistress Tess, Mistress Evilyne, etc.)

Alternatively, if you want to contribute more directly to the broader sex worker community, then you could donate to organizations like SWOP, Lysistrata, Soar Institute and St James. Or, if you want a more general organization to donate to, try the Electronic Frontier Foundation. They seem to have been one of the few privacy and free speech organizations to consistently stand up against SESTA/FOSTA.

The image below is from Mistress Iris. She also put up a couple of very thoughtful and well written instagram posts here and here. Worth checking out and reading. Not to mention its a chance to enjoy how fabulous she looks.

Mercy Mistress Update

I originally featured a post on the Mercy Mistress series last year, when Mistress Yin was still in the process of developing it. I’m very happy to report that the pilot episode has been screened recently (to some amazing  groups of people) and there’s now a teaser available online for it. From what I’ve seen it manages to both capture an essence of the truth about BDSM, while also being as sexy as hell. That’s a pretty good combination.

There are a couple of good articles on the series available here and here, along with the teaser here. I’m personally looking forward to finally being able to watch a drama developed by people who deeply and intuitively understand kink, rather than kink being simply thrown in when a writer needs a sexy ratings booster.

Ballet, Fashion and Fairy Tales

A lot of fairy tales have a healthy undercurrent of sex and kink to them. There’s imprisonment, bondage, torture, bestiality, sacrifice and all sorts of inter-generational power games. What’s not to love about that?

The image below comes from a re-telling of Snow White, with costumes by Jean Paul Gautier. The evil queen is dressed much as I always imagined her – ‘with thigh-high black boots, latex and leather strap work.’ This new version of the fairy tale comes from Angelin Preljocaj and is currently playing at the Sydney Opera house. Sadly, while the costumes are great, I don’t think it fulfills my other fantasy about the story, where the evil queen triumphs and corrupts the prince into all sorts of wonderful depravity.

Pain and Pleasure in the Windy City

My vacation got off to a fantastic start playing with Mistress Mara Mayhem. Whimpering, grunting, growling and snarling were all featured at some point. Possibly I also moaned, but only in a satisfied ‘hit me again’ type way.

I find there’s a really interesting tipping point in corporal play,  and reaching it is very dependent on the skill of the domme. If the escalation is too rapid or the intensity changes too erratic then the stress of the situation overwhelms the other emotions. It becomes very hard to zone out and relax into more intense sensations when you’re constantly on edge about what’s about to happen. On the other hand is the escalation is smooth and well judged it’s much easier to let the endorphins take over. It’s the difference between pain alone and pain as part of the dynamic between me and the domme. Too much too early is actually counter-productive in terms of building to a satisfying level of shared intensity. Needless to say Mistress Mara judged it perfectly in this session.

Of course we didn’t just indulge in corporal. There was also a fair amount of CBT involved as shown in this dick pic snap. As is usual, the removal of the various clips and clamps hurt a lot more than the initial application. Fortunately Mistress Mara ensured I was well hydrated for the session – in all sorts of different ways.

This was shot by Mistress Mara either just before or just after our session and featured on her twitter feed.

Staring down their noses at you

The haughty downward stare is a classic/cliche of the femdom genre. Similarly, the equestrian look, complete with jodhpurs, whips and spurs is another classic look. I’ve never seem them combined quite like this however. I guess that horses do come with certain inbuilt natural advantages when it comes to staring down their nose at you. Better hope he knows what a safeword is. Ballbusting takes on quite different connotations when there’s a horse in the scene.

This is the lovely Poppy De Monfort as shot by Hillchurch. While the horse might not do much for me personally, Poppy De Monfort does look quite striking in her equestrian or military gear.

Don’t be scared

Mistress Jadis has published some wise words for any submissives that are put off from playing with a particular pro-domme because of the intense images or descriptions she posts on social media. The basic gist of her post boils down to  – don’t worry about it. The kinky world is a big one, whatever your experience level there’ll always be somebody out their doing something more extreme, and a domme will adjust and enjoy playing at whatever intensity is appropriate for you.

Browsing kinky social media can be entertaining, but I don’t think it’s particularly representative of the daily reality. If it was then 90% of pro-domme clients would be annoying assholes who cancel at the last minute, the other 10% being hard core bullwhip loving masochists who get locked in chastity 364 days a year. Fin-dommes would all make thousands of dollars every day, munch planning would always be a disaster and every relationship would either be amazing or a trainwreck. There’d be barely be time for actual kinky activity to happen.

My general observation is that the more experienced and skilled a domme is, the greater her ability to judge someones limits and provide a very gradual and controlled escalation of intensity. So the ability to build to a particularly intense scene is a good indicator for all levels of activity. And any professional who only wants to do extreme scenes is probably not going to be making a lot of money.

Ms Jadis is a Sydney based dominatrix with a social media presence here.