Ff – Page 11 – Femdom Resource

50 shades of bleauh

BDSM has been popping up in the mainstream media recently thanks to the erotic novel ‘50 Shades of Grey‘. This book has been at the top of the digital best seller list, featured in mainstream magazines and newspapers, and just enjoyed a bidding war over the movie rights. It even got Dr. Drew in trouble for making dumb comments on the Today show.

When I first heard about it I was pleased that a BDSM novel was getting some widespread coverage. I liked the idea that people with a hidden kinky streak might feel they can explore it without embarrassing themselves. Then I took a look inside it via the free pages on Amazon. It’s pretty underwhelming. In fact I was about as far from whelmed as it’s possible to be. I can enjoy all sorts of gender and D/s combinations if they’re done well, but this has horrible prose, characters, structure, plot, you name it. I think this reviewer nailed it when she said “…this is a pretty dreadful book. Put simply, author E L James … is not a very good writer”.

I’ll quote a small section to give you a taste of what I mean. Here’s a scene where the male dominant is presenting his rules and limits to the lead female character. They’ve done nothing together at this point, and the female proto-submissive is not only completely inexperienced in BDSM, but is also a virgin who doesn’t even masturbate. There’s no reason given for this. She’s not crazy religious or anything, she’s just your typically 21 year old female college student whose sexual experience consists of being kissed twice.

I stare down at his rules. Waxing! Waxing what?
Everything? Ugh.

“So, limits. These are mine.” He hands me another piece of paper.

Hard Limits
No acts involving fire play.
No acts involving urination or defecation and the products thereof
No acts involving needles, knives, piercing, or blood.
No acts involving gynecological medical instruments
No acts involving children or animals
No acts that will leave any permanent marks on the skin
No acts involving breath control

Ugh. He has to write these down! Of course – they all look very sensible, and frankly, necessary… any sane person wouldn’t want to be involved in this sort of thing surely? Though I now feel a little queasy.
“Is there anything you’d like to add?” he asks kindly.
Crap. I’ve no idea. I am completely stumped. He gazes at me and furrows his brow.
From ’50 Shades of Grey’

From a writing point of view the ‘Ugh’ and the ‘Crap’ are jarring to read. The book seems to be full of these kind of interjections, including an endless stream of ‘Holy ****’ (just in a few pages I spotted a heck, a shit, a crap, a fuck and a cow). From a character development point of view I instantly hate the guy for putting ‘no children or animals’ into his list. Anyone who feels the need to do that is highly suspect. And from a plot perspective it makes zero sense to have a conversation about limits with someone who has no clue what is going on or what the possibilities are. It’s like the author knew about the idea of listing and negotiating limits, but had absolutely zero idea how to build it into the plot in a realistic and believable way.

I realize that my own attempts at fiction don’t exactly mark me out as the second coming of Shakespeare (although I did grow up near his home town), but there are a lot of genuinely good BDSM authors out there. Lily over at theblackleatherbelt just wrote a post on an anthology featuring some of them. Alternatively, from the femdom perspective, Her Majesty’s Plaything just featured a series of posts on Titian Beresford. Sascha Illyvich has even put together a handy list of 50 books she thinks are better options.

In my opinion the best literary thing to have come out of the book is this brilliant short parody written by the genuinely talented author Laura Antoniou (responsible for the Marketplace series). It’s far more entertaining than the original, while capturing the style perfectly.

It’s entirely possible that my original hopes for this book will still be realized. If it makes more people open to BDSM and exploring their own sexual desires then it probably doesn’t matter that it reads like the worst kind of internet fan fiction. And it’s nice to see an author making a bunch of money via one of the new publishing routes. I just wish this breakout book had been one I could recommend to people, rather than one I’d hate to be associated with.

Picking an image for this post was a little tricky, as Mf material isn’t the goal of the blog. I decided to go with a shot that featured both a female submissive and dominant reading a book that’s a touch better written than 50 shades of grey.

I found this shot on the Beauty of Submission tumblr.

Added John Willie to Femdom Artwork

John Willie is normally considered more of a general BDSM and fetish artist than a femdom one. However, he’s really a pioneering figure, setting the standard for a lot of the great BDSM artists that came after him. Given that fact, and that a lot of his work is F/f, I think he’s a very appropriate artist to add my femdom artwork pages.

The joy of sucks

I got to play with a latex vacuum bed a few nights ago. For those of you who have never seen one of these interesting toys, it’s essentially a big sealed latex bag hooked up to a vacuum cleaner. The submissive lies in the bag and as the air is sucked out it seals around him or her, holding them tightly in place. If you’ve never seen one before then I’d suggest browsing this kink engineering page, which gives a pretty good overview.

This was actually my first time in a latex bed, but not my first time in a vacuum bed. Lady Lydia also owns a neoprene model, which is the same material they make wetsuits out of. We tried that late last year and it was a very different experience. The neoprene version is heavy and opaque, very claustrophobic, and the thick material grips tightly around the body. It’s an extremely intense sensation, high on adrenalin and low on relaxation.

In contrast I found the latex model a far more floaty and trippy experience. The latex was thinner and lighter, feeling more like a tight second skin than a sack of imprisonment. It also let some light through, making the world an abstract pale blur, rather than an inky pit. It very quickly put me into subspace, where time seems wonky and my conscious thought processes go on vacation somewhere outside my head. Of course being sealed away in a latex bag wasn’t going to stop Lydia having some fun, and she layered on sensations, using electrical shocks to the genitals and clips on various delicate bits of flesh. I quickly discovered that anything that hurts a little when first applied to my body inside the bag, will soon hurt a hell of a lot once the latex is squeezing tightly down against my skin. Electrical contacts are particularly ‘fun’ in this respect.

I had a hunt around for some good latex vacbed images to illustrate this post, but sadly couldn’t find anything. Everyone just ends up looking like a fetishistic version of Han Solo encased in carbonite. So instead I just decided to riff on the latex theme, and use these two latex heavy images from Jim Weathers bondage cafe (found on the Lipstick & Latex tumblr). The first shot has a little bit of a flirty teasing air to it, which creates a nice contrast to the second. That has much more of a sense of “What the hell!” and “You thought I was joking?” about it.

The bad old days

Bondage blog pointed me at a long but fascinating interview with John Blakemore. He was one of the very early producers of bondage movies back in the 70’s, shooting stuff for HOM and Cal-Star. The original material was before my time, but various stills and fuzzy video clips have been floating around on usenet for years.

All his movies are M/f and a world away from any kind of female dominant aesthetic. However, for anyone interested in the history of porn and BDSM, it’s an informative glimpse behind the scenes and back in time. As he makes clear, he was operating in isolation, in very murky legal territory and with old fashioned technology.

At the time, the laws in the United States prohibited any form of penetration, or sex with bondage, or actual torture and so I made these films expressly for the European market, to be taken out of the country. They were not even edited here. I had to hand deliver the raw footage. It was never out of my possession. I put it in Barbara’s hands; she in turn put it in the hands of someone from Europe. And even then, it was probably risky, although the film had not yet even been developed. It was raw footage that had not yet been developed. And it went out of the country and it did not come back. I was rather shocked to find out a couple years ago that some of this stuff is available.

While I do find it fascinating, it’s not an interview that makes me warm to the man. His approach and attitude comes across as pretty disturbing. He’s not big on concepts like SSC (Safe, Sane and Consensual) and some of his views are fairly ludicrous.

The simple fact of the matter is that in the Western world for the last 2000 years, if you take a young man that’s full of testosterone…and you put him in a situation where he has the place, the equipment and the ability to do anything to a gorgeous young woman that he wants to, with absolutely no repercussions of any kind, he will torture her and rape her.

Clearly technical issues areas like picture quality and the production values aren’t the only things that have improved since the bad old days of BDSM porn.

Given his work is all male dominant, I’m not going to feature any shots from it here. Fortunately he mentions the artist Bishop in the interview, who also used to do work for HOM. That therefore gives me an excuse to feature some of his wonderful artwork.

BDSM equipment page now live

The eagle eyed reader may have spotted a new option in the top menu bar – Equipment. This is a new page listing all the interesting sites selling equipment, furniture or clothes that I’ve come across. A few of the links are ones I’ve discovered via my usual random web browsing, a small number are from where I’ve shopped in the past, but the vast majority come from the comments and wish lists of pro-dommes. I figure that they’re probably the best people to listen to when it comes to BDSM hardware and outfits. After all, they buy a lot of it and give it a tougher workout than the average lifestyle player ever will.

If anyone has suggestions for other sites to add to the list then please leave a comment. I’d particularly like to know of smaller sites that offer very specialist craftsmanship. They’re typically the harder ones to track down whilst simultaneously creating the most interesting items.

For illustration I’ve picked two images. The first is from Walsh Metalworks and features Mistress Alex, shot by Natasha Gornik, wearing a metal corset fabricated by Sullivan Walsh. The second is a padded bondage chair from MetalBound. I’m afraid I don’t know the names of the models involved in the second shot.

Update: Both Jim and Lily kindly pointed out via comments that the submissive in the chair in the second shot is Madison Young.

A delightfully wrapped package

After yesterday’s rather tetchy post and extreme image, here’s something a little lighter. The rope bondage looks pretty but also seems effective. I like to imagine the dominant is about to lean in and bite some tender and enticing patch of exposed flesh.

This is from the beauty of submission tumblr. If you’re a fan of F/f images then it’s a tumblr well worth taking a look through.

Put her in the comfy chair!

I’m continuing the F/f theme from yesterday’s post. However, while I called yesterday’s image ‘sweet’, I’m not sure many people would apply the same description here. It’s more a case of turning her into the comfy chair, rather than putting her in it.

For most people I expect it’s the severity of the bondage that stands out, but for me it’s the expressions. One is icy calm, unflustered. The other is emotional and flushed, even a little tearful. That contrast really makes the image work for me.

The artist goes under the handle of papermania. I’ve seen his work floating around in a lot of different places but I’ve never managed to track down any biographical details or a homepage. The majority of his work is M/f but there’s also some F/f and F/m. If you’d like to browse more there’s a g-e.hentai gallery here and a couple of imagefap galleries here and here. Be aware that some of his images are fairly strong fantasy BDSM.

Post D

This is my 500th post. I find that kind of amazing. Sixteen months of blogging doesn’t seem that long, while creating 500 posts seems like a major achievement.

I thought I’d use the opportunity to reflect a little on the blog and make a request for some feedback. I’m mostly happy with what I’ve collected here so far. The artwork pages, the image link page and the fiction page seem useful and, according to my server statistics, are all very popular. The BDSM articles page needs work and a more frequent update policy, but I think it has potential if I just put some time into it. The weak link is really the page on commercial sites, which has been left to rot. Maintaining and updating links to interesting commercial sites is a lot trickier, as so much of their content is hidden behind their pay wall. Without taking memberships of dozens of sites, it’s hard to know what’s good and what isn’t.

So the question is, what else would you like to see here? What would be useful? Are their particular resources I should be tracking and linking to? Or should I be doing a better job of what I have already? What about the front page and my regular posts? Do I have too much of certain types of material? Am I missing certain themes that you’d like to see? Particular things you’d like me to write about? Any comments or ideas are welcome.

I’ve been kicking around some ideas of things to add or change. I’m not sure about any of them however.

Add a links page for BDSM equipment. As well as the major players (like Stockroom and Extreme Restraints) there are lots of small custom manufactures (like these guys or these guys) that might be interesting to track.
Turn the commercial sites page into something more like the image link page. I’d maintain a bunch of links to all sorts of commercial content producers, including major players, independent producers and pro-dommes.
Create a limited pro-domme directory. I don’t see much point trying to replicate something like the Max Fisch domina guide, but possibly a smaller list of high quality links might be interesting. Of course the problem is defining what I mean by ‘high quality’. I don’t play with enough different pro-dommes to make it a personal selection, and I’m not sure how else I can filter without creating a maintenance nightmare.

As I said any feedback is welcome, either on these ideas or anything else you think I should add. Just leave me a comment or drop me an email.

Picking an image for this post seemed difficult. I’m not sure what’s appropriate for a 500th post celebration. So I’ll just go with one from my queue of images. I don’t post a lot of F/f, but I thought this one was kind of sweet. I also noticed that Suzanne just posted about finding a possible femme sub, so this is appropriate for at least somebodies blog post, even if it’s not mine.

Ambiguity

I find this an appealing image despite the ambiguity of it. Although possibly I like it because of the ambiguity.

The setting is unusual. With the big leather seats it looks like a gentleman’s club (of the old sort rather than the strip sort). The mostly naked brunette seems to be presenting herself, adopting a position of vulnerability, while the blonde inspects and caresses her. It’s the kind of image the viewer can project their own fantasies onto. I get a very sensuous D/s vibe from it, but that’s just my personal projection.

I found this on the Sex N Comics tumblr site. I’d love to know it’s original source, as it’s kind of an intriguing shot. It seems too explicit for a mainstream fashion shot, and yet too composed and restrained for a porn shot. Kink.com has the upper floor which is supposed to be a luxurious ‘Edwardian great house’ but their furnishings always look cheap and tacky compared to this.

Guilt. Loathing. Anger. Shame. Sickness.

I enjoy getting annoyed at an article or book occasionally. Gesticulating in the direction of the screen and muttering “What the fuck is this guy thinking?” can be cathartic. Fortunately for me, thanks to the Internet, there’s an inexhaustible supply of such articles close at hand.

The latest one to trigger my WTF reaction was one in GQ on hard core pornography and the authors reaction to it. The post title gives a little hint as to what that reaction might be. Or maybe this little snippet, when he’s talking about Max Hardcore.

I needed to know we were different. I needed to know I wasn’t him. I needed to know that whatever the hell was wrong with me was not as bad as whatever the hell was wrong with him.

A couple of thousand miles, I decided, wasn’t too far to go to find someone I hated more than myself.

….[ then immediately after talking to Max ]….

It had been over two hours. I didn’t hate him nearly enough. And it made me hate myself even more.

As far as cathartic emotions goes, this article was pretty successful. I managed to get annoyed, bemused, puzzled and incredulous all in the space of four pages.

I read a wide variety of kink and sex blogs, with all sorts of wild behavior in them. There are people getting whipped, trampled, cuckolded, spanked, diapered, caged, stabbed, burnt and pissed on. Yet somehow they all seem more emotionally healthy than this ‘normal’ guy. Guilt and self-loathing must be horrible emotions to have to live with.

For an accompanying image I tried to find something that I felt guilty about liking. It wasn’t easy. There’s all sorts of freaky stuff I like, but I don’t feel guilty about any of it. Finally I settled on this image. It’s completely ridiculous. There’s a cliched classroom setting, a pastiche of a school mistress outfit in latex and a woman posing as a student in latex underwear. But for some reason I think it’s kind of cute.

Image is from the Captive Culture site.