Tag: Fm

Heavy Bondage with Mistress Tess (Part 1)

I’ve finally had time to sit down and write up a few details from my amazing session time with Mistress Tess. As the post title suggests we did a lot of heavy bondage, with nipple torture, CBT and tease+denial added for extra piquancy. There were a lot of different set-ups involved, so I can only capture a few highlights here.

We started in a heavy metal bondage chair (pic 1). This was perhaps one of the lighter bondage set-ups, but there was still lots of heavy straps, plastic wrap and bondage shoes with high heels. Moving wasn’t an option (pic 2). With immobility assured, Mistress Tess added some pain, with a line of clips across the chest (pic 3) and a prickly Scott Paul pin wheel (see pic 4).  The bruising from the clips stayed for some days afterwards. What I love about this chair is it makes you both comfortable and vulnerable. I could relax back into the bondage while the spread leg design allowed Mistress Tess to lean in and get really into my face (pic 5). It’s objectifying and intimate all at the same time.

From there we moved to a bench set-up with a lot of straps and padlocks involved (pic 6). My arms here are in leather sleeves and the feet held with an interesting en-pointe bondage strap ‘shoe’. I love all the little locks here (pic 7). Not strictly necessary to hold me in place, but very sexy.  The clip marks on my chest from the chair setup are still visible (pic 8). To add an extra frisson to the proceedings Mistress Tess then pulled out some electrical toys and a locking Kali’s teeth (pic 9). This was probably the most painful thing we did, with the marks from the crocodile clips still visible a week or so later (pic 10). The Kali teeth device is particularly problematic one for a masochist as I’ve written before. I was deep into subspace at this point, with adrenaline just washing through me (pic 11). I think I was shaking like a leaf when everything was finally removed.

I’ll save the remain shots for a follow-up post tomorrow. To finish this one, I’ll feature a great artist as portrayed by another great artist.

This is of course Mistress Tess as drawn by the inimitable Sardax.

Playing with Troy Orleans

As I mentioned in past posts, I was in NYC recently and lucky enough to play with Troy Orleans. An afternoon of much bondage fun ensued. She was kind enough to snap some images of the session and I thought I’d share a few of those here.

We started in a standing set-up with a cock pillory (see photo 1). Standing bondage is always interesting as you can’t relax into it. I think it keeps the submissive more present in the moment. Troy added a leather corset, arm cuffs, mittens and an ass hook to complete the ensemble (see photo 2 and photo 3). I don’t think I’ve played with corsets before and I have to say I’m now a fan. Not only do they look sexy but they also have a subtle sense of restriction and control, both to the body and the breath.

From there we moved to another standing set-up, this time using a harness gag that attached to a metal upright (see photo 4 and photo 5). Having your head attached to a fixed very immobile point is a quite an unusual sensation. Moving your head around, even if it’s only subtle shifts, is a very natural part of communication. Taking that away, particular in combination with a gag, is a real rush. In this setup the hands were pulled back and locked to the corset (see photo 6). I love all the shiny metal elements in this image.

The next set-up was on the floor, in a really unusual arrangement (see photo 7 and photo 8). Here the arms and legs are wrapped in stiff leather bracers and chains and straps form a web around the body. As I tried to move an arm or a leg it would pull at the other limbs, with everything connecting to everything else. It made me feel a bit like a puppet on a set of strings. It’s a very different sense of control (or I guess loss of control) compared to a more regular set-up of tight, anchored down bondage. It might be a fun set-up to combine with electrical play, where involuntary muscle twitches in one limb would ripple out to other limbs.

We finished with some tightly wrapped leather (see photo 9 and photo 10). This was like a single sleeve for the legs, with an arm and wrist cuff arrangement over the chest. This is the kind of bondage that I can relax into and zone out. Although it’s hard to get too relaxed when you’ve a creative domme on the lose and dreaming up interesting ways to grab your attention (see photo below)!

It was – as is always the case with Troy – a fabulous and very enjoyable session. So happy that our paths could intersect again!

If you’re in the NYC area and you’d like to session with Troy, then her professional site is here. For those who are further afield, you can find her Bluesky here.

Big Bottom Baker

It’s not often you come across a combination of femdom, mythology, big bottoms and baking. However, if that eclectic mixture happens to be your kink, then today is your lucky day. Deaddie Mercury has posted a comic on Bluesky with all those elements, describing it as “BDSMythology, a collection of Greek myths retold with a flavor.” I’m guessing the original story being retold here is Arachne and Athena.

This is the cover image for the story. You can see the rest of it over at Deaddie Mercury’s Bluesky.

Domme Song Dummy

Taking a break from the vacation posts to link to this Harper’s article entitled Domme Songs. It’s an essay by Michael Robbins reflecting on his masochism, experiences with a domme and how it links to the state of the world.

It’s a piece that I’ve seen posted to social media several times recently, often with positive comments from people I respect. I find that odd, because I hate it. I’m not the only blogger to feel that way. Miss Pearl has written a passionate and detailed criticism of it in a post here. She’s done a far better job there than I will do here, so go read that if you want more than my cursory thoughts.

My main beef with the piece is his attempt to link masochism with the destruction of the planet and our unfolding ecological disaster. Which is nonsensical. We’re not destroying the planet because we get a thrill from doing so. We’re doing so because we want stuff, we want it now and we don’t want to think about the consequences. A point he seems to acknowledge later, but then he does nothing with this apparently contradictory thought.

People’s kinks are complex and highly personal. Not political. Someone who has both masochistic and anxious tendencies may well use the former to address the latter. Nobodies kinks exist in a vacuum. But the theater of BDSM play has bugger all to do with the disappearance of snails in Hawaii. I’m all for thinking deeply about kink and what it means to you, but this article fails to do that. There’s no honesty, just pretension and wordplay.

No idea what the source of this picture is but it seemed appropriate. One sometimes needs a hint on when to keep quiet.

Vacation Continued

I had a fabulous session with Troy Orleans this week. Much bondage was involved. I’ve a bunch of photographs to share, but haven’t yet had time to sort through them. I’ll try and do that in the coming days and put together a post on the session.

I have a session with someone else lined up for tomorrow, which required a very painful and unusual sacrifice tonight. I went to a fancy tasting menu restaurant, but ordered the nonalcoholic beverage pairing. I’ve never done that before. Sadly, I’m now at an age where I can’t drink a bunch of wine at night and play hard the next day. Getting old sucks. At least tomorrow should be fun, in a cleared headed way.

I’ll leave you with a shot of another kinky gentleman on his holidays.

Don’t have a source for this. I found it via tumblr.

On the Road

Apologies for the lack of recent posts. I am on vacation for the first time in a good while, so the last few days were all about planning, packing and traveling. Happily, I’m now safely ensconced in a comfy hotel room, looking forward to a few sessions of kinky fun and a lot of good food. My kind of getaway.

While I contemplate that exciting prospect, I’ll leave you with some visual loveliness.

Sadly, I’m not sure who the artist is for this work.

Happiness

Greater Good Magazine has an interview with the sociologists Alicia M. Walker and Arielle Kuperberg on their new book – Bound by BDSM: Unexpected Lessons for Building a Happier Life.

The message of the interview and the book is the happiness BDSM can bring.

VL: What did you discover in your research that surprised you?

AW: I was just really shocked overall about how happy everybody was, which became the crux of the book. There’s never been another group of people that I’ve interviewed, for every single person that I talked to, who was just wildly happy. And this is a huge sample—96 completed interviews, but I talked to far, far more people who didn’t end up completing interviews. That is just extremely unusual.

Obviously, I’m happy that BDSM makes people happy. Far be it from me to knock such a positive message. But I do wonder if more careful qualification is needed here. They’re not necessarily talking about people who are kinky and attracted to BDSM. Nor are they even talking about people who simply practice BDSM. As far as I can tell, they’re talking about a narrower subset – the people who are part of a BDSM community. I think that means people who go to munches, attend play parties, go to community events, etc.

It makes me wonder what the data would look like if you separated kink from sociability. Are couples who practice kink purely in their private lives happier than non kinky couples? How about people who exercise their kinky side with pro-dommes? What about sociable community focused non-kinky people compared to people in the BDSM community? Is it BDSM that makes people happy or the community elements that form around it?

I guess I should read the book and find out if they tease apart that kind of data. In the meantime I’ll leave you with an image of a domme who certainly appears to be in her happy place. It’s less clear how the submissive feels about it, but I’m sure he’s smiling.

This is Miss Erika Rayne, a pro-domme based out of Bristol, UK. I sourced the image via her Bluesky feed. If you’re in the Bristol area and interested in finding some happiness of your own, her session and contact information is available on her website.

CFNM Fetish Style

In looking at this image it struck me how rarely I play with dommes in serious fetishwear. The common stereotype of a pro-domme is someone dressed head to toe like Vespa here from Reflective Desire. All tight latex, straps, heels and corsets. Yet in reality that look only gets widely used in content creation or in very specific fetish sessions. It looks fabulous but it’s just too much of a pain to put together and work with for a regular session of a couple of hours. If only these kind of outfits worked like the Futurama spray on bikini.

This is Vespa and Heavy shooting for Reflective Desire. You can see more via their site and their Bluesky feed.

Before and After

I remain conflicted on the topic of AI and femdom content. On one hand, I do like the fact people are producing interesting new material. For example, the image below by VelvetLash (who I’ve featured here before). I love this image and it’s not the kind of thing you’d see in regular femdom content. Medical and bondage material certainly exists, but this feels like something new and worthwhile.

On the other hand the sheer amount of AI dreck filling up sites is depressing. It’s so easy to pump out hundreds of variations on a theme. There’s a danger that any creative examples like this one will be buried beneath a tsunami of identikit Nvidia dommes.

Thinking about it tonight put me in mind of Low Background Steel. That’s an odd connection, but hear me out. If you’re making sensitive laboratory grade radiation devices, you need to use steel made prior to the late 1940’s. That’s because later steel is contaminated by airborne particles from nuclear testing. This uncontaminated steel can be collected from old shipwrecks or other pre-war steel construction. I wonder if in the future we’ll think about imagery having a similar before and after time. Images shown to be published pre 2024 (or thereabouts) will be considered differently than anything later. Post the AI explosion, we’ll always have visual contamination to keep in mind.