A filthy habbit

This image reminded me of one of the funnier Collar Me posts I ever read. I’m afraid I can’t remember the exact words, so I’ll have to paraphrase. It was written by a dominant woman looking for a new male submissive, and read something like….

I’ve lost track of the number of men who in our initial correspondence have said they’ll do anything for me. I can whip them, beat them, bind them and cage them. They’ll tongue my ass, drink my piss, lick the dirt from my shoes and eat dog food from a dish on the floor. It’s always “Whatever you want Mistress.” And then I’ll mention that I smoke and it’s “Ewwww, that’s disgusting. I can’t deal with that.”

Obviously it’s a case of “Whatever you want Mistress…..provided it fits my preconceived fantasy of what a Mistress should do.”

Personally, while I dislike smoking in daily life, it can be an interesting dynamic in a D/s scene. There are a lot of painful games that can be played with a hot cigarette or cigar. And blowing smoke in a submissive’s face can work both at the level of humiliation and worship. I remember doing a very intense scene where, in-between applying burns to my skin, the mistress would slowly blow smoke into my mouth for me to inhale. Floating as I was in subspace, this felt like a gift, allowing me to draw her breath deep into my body.

Mistress blowing smoke in slave's faceI found this on the Awesome Femdom tumblr site. It’s obviously originally from the Russian Mistress site.

Super Sub

This image put a smile on my face when I stumbled across in earlier today. Not sure who the mysterious lady is (I was never a big comic book fan), but she seems to have put Superman in his place.

Although as I come to think about it, Superman would probably be a pretty boring slave to own. He’d be able to complete all his tasks and chores very quickly, but that would mean he’d be hanging around waiting for more instructions all the time. And he’d be pretty tough to punish unless you had some kryptonite toys. I guess you could get him to punish himself, but where’s the fun in that? In a genre packed with kinky subtext and power games, he always was one of the most conventional and vanilla characters.

Updated: This is probably carrying my fetish for attribution a little too far, but thanks to sub2mgi I can now add that the mysterious lady is someone called Star Sapphire. I was also hoping to add a couple of terse sentences describing exactly who she is. However, after looking at her wikipedia page, it’s clear she’s one of the many comic characters whose back story requires a supercomputer and a team of nerds to keep track of. As best I can tell, she’s something to do with the Green Lantern.

Superman as a slave

Oxygen is for losers

I had an amazing few hours with Lady Lydia earlier this evening. I spent most of it floating around in subspace, just a big puddle of relaxed submission. She used a variety of tools to get me there, including a leather straightjacket, needles, a ball clamp, a crop and a pair of chopsticks. However, the most devilish tool of all was a simple piece of plastic wrap. Draped over my face it slowly got warmer and stickier, dragged closer with each intake of breath. Careful regulation of breathing helped prevent it closing off the air supply entirely, but it’s tough to breath slowly when somebody is trying to pull your nipple off with a pair of chopsticks. Or slapping a crop across a few carefully positioned needles. The natural tendency is to moan and suck in a big lungful of air. At which point the plastic does its best impression of an alien facehugger, and suddenly oxygen has become a scarce commodity.

We were far too involved in the unfolding scene to snap photographs. Which may come as a relief to those of you out there with a low tolerance for skinny naked British guys in your daily blog material. However, as an alternative I found this infinitely more visually appealing shot of Lydia from her visit to OWK. In this case the plastic wrap is being used for bondage rather than breathplay purposes, but the limited availability of oxygen is a common theme.

Lady Lydia at OWKI found the image in this free gallery on the OWK cinema site. You can also buy the DVD of the entire session from Lydia herself.

A handful

Here’s a mistress with a very satisfied expression on her face. I like to imagine that as she tightens her grip, her smile is only going to get wider.

The pegs on his nipples are kind of cute. Although the last time someone tried these kind of pegs on me, I was surprised at how mild they were. These look dramatic, but it’s the little sharp clips that hurt way more.

Handful I found this on the Femdom Style Counsel tumblr site. I don’t see an original attribution anywhere, but I’m going to guess it’s from one of the kink.com sites.

Inching to the edge

Mistress Rex isn’t the most prolific of writers on my blogroll, but when she does post it’s always interesting, thought provoking and highly literate. Her most recent post helped crystallize a number of thoughts I’d been mulling over recently. I suggest reading the whole thing, but I’ll just quote the section I particularly want to talk about.

I’d be bored out of my mind if I stayed within the parameters of what clients (or lovers) told me they think they want. It’s domination. It’s the thrill of control and power. It requires a degree of force and discomfort, a shifting of will. How do you know how much you can take if you’re not challenged? How do you know how much you can give if you’re unwilling to offer it?

Brock Lesner is an idiot, but he happened to deliver a beautiful concept (wherever he got it from) on national TV when he said that, “fights are won by inches.” Technique and skill can take you a long way, but it’s intensity that fills those inches – it’s knowing to keep going when you have your opponent hurt. It’s holding someone’s head under water despite their thrashing, because you know that panic is a moment too soon.

Mistress Rex from her post titled ‘Give Her an Inch and She’ll Walk All Over You

I’ve observed that being stressed and forced close to their thresholds of tolerance is a common desire amongst submissives. It’s certainly a desire I have in any session I do. No matter what the activity, I like to feel I’m being pushed and stretched in new ways. That I’m going to go further than I have in the past. I hate to stop an activity because it’s too intense for me (and I almost never do), but at the same time it’s never a completely satisfying session if we don’t briefly flirt with that possibility. It’s a very tricky line to walk.

The need to push for this intensity, to inch forward towards that threshold, is one that has bothered me a little. Am I just doing it for stupid macho-sub reasons? To prove that I can do it? And am I going to run out of inches one day? Find out that there is nowhere left to go and I’ve burnt out. Most other activities in life don’t require this kind of dynamic. I love fine dining and nice wine, but I don’t have a constant need to push my boundaries every time I eat in a restaurant. Why is my masochism and submission different?

I think Mistress Rex has helped me answer these questions. It’s about the shifting of will, the relinquishing of power. It’s only in those last few inches that dominance and control is absolutely demonstrated. What happens up to that point is just sensation. It might be interesting or pleasurable (in the masochistic sense) sensation, but it doesn’t cost the submissive anything until it approaches the edge. It’s the extraction of that payment where both the dominant and the submissive find the real satisfaction.

Breathplay with water immersionMistress Rex’s comment about holding someone’s head under water made me initially think of this image, but I posted it because it represents a type of play that quickly pushes me close to some of my personal edges. I struggle with anything that closely covers my face, whether it’s a leather hood or a tub of water, so using this apparatus would be to extract a very high price from me.

The dominant is Isis Love in a Divine Bitches shoot.

Nervous Anticipation

This image caught my eye for the way it so beautifully switches the traditional roles around. His body language and expression suggest nervous excitement, a naked virgin awaiting his new experience. In contrast she’s controlling, predatory, seductive. Gently pressing him down as she kisses and licks his neck, sliding the tip of her tool along his back and into his crease. I hope she’s gentle with him on his first time.

Strap-onI found this on the Am Bi Guosity tumblr site. There’s not a lot of femdom material there, but it might be interesting if you’re looking for ts girl, bisexual and ambiguous glamor shots.

Smiles

My last post promoted a request for some happy dommes, so I had a hunt through my grab bag of collected images to see what I could find.

Personally I’m a big fan of being viciously attacked by a gleeful sadist. I suspect most non-kinky people assume that seeing a dominatrix involves lots of crawling around on the floor while she calls you a worthless dog who isn’t fit to lick her shoes. And that can be fun now and again. But the vast majority of my sessions feature laughter, jokes and a happy mistress. I find it much easier to make a connection and feel engaged with someone who appears to be enjoying our interaction. After all, if I’m going to give up my power to someone in a D/s sense, it’s nice to feel they appreciate the gift.

Smiling MistressSmiling MistressI found this first image on ‘The heart’s dark desire‘ tumblr site. I’m afraid I don’t know where it’s originally from. The second image is an old shot from the Young Goddess site.

Authenticity

Over on erosblog Bacchus has a post where he attributes his relatively small number of femdom related posts to a lack of authentic material. This struck me as kind of odd, and I left a comment on the post to that effect. Without a doubt there is a lot of poor femdom porn, mostly consisting of models dressed in leather sneering into the camera. But there’s a huge amount of badly composed inauthentic material in all types of porn. If anything I tend to find a greater degree of authenticity in the femdom genre. The women featured are typically professional dominants who shoot porn but have also make it part of their lifestyle and their daily business. And the men are often lifestyle submissives who are volunteering for the pleasure of the session. These are people playing in very similar way to how they play when the camera isn’t present. If you can’t find interesting femdom images it’s probably because you’re not looking for it, or at least you’re not looking in the right places.

His comment sent me wandering through my image collection to pick out a suitably ‘authentic’ image to post. I was initially looking for a more lifestyle shot, but instead this shot from CBTandBallBusting.com caught my eye. I think it captures a perfect moment in time. The stretched elastic band, her happy smile and his nervous anticipation. Here are two people very much lost in a kinky moment.

Snap!The domme I recognize as Ms Mona Rogers. She’s featured on this blog a couple of times in the past (see here and here). I found the image on rohosub’s kinks tumblr site, but it’s obviously originally from CBTandBallBusting.com.

The key ingredient for a perfect evening

Images of women teasing men in chastity are fairly common in femdom porn. There are a lot of keys twirled around and dangled in front of humiliated male faces. Suspending the key from a necklace is also a common theme. That not only turns the key of control into a decorative piece of jewelry, but also suspends it in a location that highlights the sexuality and beauty of the woman. So, apart from the attractive smile, this first image is nothing particularly exciting.

However, as the second image shows, Mistress Sophie Dee likes to do a little more than simply tease with a key. It seems our hero is perfectly placed (in an ingenious set of stocks) to watch her enjoy a particularly intimate encounter with another man. The rest of the evening then unfolds pretty much as you might expect.

I have to admit this is one of the occasional situations where I think “That’s really hot.” And then a few seconds later I think “How screwed up is it that I think this is really hot?”

Not, I hasten to add, that I have a problem with that kind of screwed up. I’m a kinky omnivore, and I’m happy to enjoy whatever seems interesting and exciting to my strange brain. But it does fascinate and puzzle me how my neural pathways ended up wired this particular way.

Cuckold being teased with a keyCuckold watching mistress with lover

This sequence of images comes from the Divine Bitches site and features Mistress Sophie Dee. There’s a short free video clip from the session at this page, along with the opportunity to purchase the entire picture set and full length video.

A considerate mistress

I found this image on the Superior Women tumblr site accompanied by the following caption.

Remember to hold some in your mouth this time then the cigarette won’t burn you.

This struck me as deliciously evil, and I salute the imagination that came up with that caption. There’s the double degradation of being used as both a urinal and an ashtray, the potential pain of the burn and the predicament of holding the right amount of liquid (without spilling) to minimize it. Not to mention the nicely twisted psychology of the mistress showing concern whilst infliction the suffering. I always enjoy that particular blend of emotional sadism.

Of course if the slave get’s everything right, what’s the end result? A mouth awash in urine and cigarette butts. It’s a fantastically twisted scenario to make that the best case result.

Drinking and burning