The beauty of dominant women
This is a lovely shot from Bondage Liberation and Elise Graves. What particularly makes it work for me is the contrast between the heavily fetishistic bondage scene and the human touch of Elise’s smile and casual pose. It’s great to be intense while still retaining a sense of playfulness.
Image is from this tweet. You can get a lot more similar content at the Bondage Liberation site.
This advertising image is odd, but weirdly hot. Not exactly sure what’s supposed to be going on – he’s sketching her shoes and she’s mad about it? Whatever the supposed scenario, it somehow works for me.
It’s from a 2010 Nordstrom advertising campaign by Ruben Toledo.
The Huffpost has an article about a woman who discovered BDSM in her 50’s and ended up with a kinky partner twenty four years her junior. It’s a cute tale and I liked the part about their cleverly constructed cover story for how they met.
What I found surprising about it was the idea of being awakened to BDSM late in life by going to a class on it. I absolutely don’t mean that critically. I’m always keen for more people to discover kink and I totally get her attitude of “OMG! I need to try all the things!” when exploring the physical side of it for the first time. It’d be great if more people could be converted to the joys of BDSM via classes. I just find it odd – as someone who had kinky thoughts from a very early age – to imagine being not kinky for decades and then suddenly getting into it. For me it seems like a very fundamental love/hate kind of thing, but obviously that’s not true for everyone.
I’m afraid I don’t know the artist for this drawing.
Update: Thanks to a helpful comment I can now attribute this to the artist Kirsty Whiten.
For submissives who primarily play with pro-dommes, where is the best place in the world to live? Setting aside existing relationships – assume we’re talking about a newly minted fresh faced submissive with no history or experience – what location offers the greatest possibilities?
Having just returned from the UK, I think my answer would probably be London. Obviously, like other great cities such as New York or Tokyo, it’s home to a large number of talented pro-dommes and plays host to a lot of visiting dommes. If you want to turn a kinky session into a day trip, then dommes in places like Paris, Manchester, Birmingham and most of the South of England are options. Make it into a long weekend, and suddenly cities like Berlin, Stuttgart, Amsterdam, Edinburgh and Glasgow are all possibilities. On top of this, the UK sex work laws are less stupid than the US (while still being very stupid), and social attitudes to kink tend to be relatively liberal. It’s not perfect, but on balance I think it might just be the best place to be a kinky person in the professional scene.
Obviously quality always beats quantity, and you could have a fabulous D/s relationship with someone while living in a tiny hamlet that’s miles from anywhere. But chemistry is important whether a relationship is professional or lifestyle, and the more people you have to meet, the better your odds of finding that elusive fizzy reaction.
This is Lola Ruin, a Manchester based pro-domme. She’s about a two hour train journey from London. Not exactly a quick trip, but still faster than jetting between major cities in the US. The image is from her twitter feed.
Returning to London for a few days has given me the opportunity to sneak some more kink into the last part of my vacation. Specifically I was lucky enough to set-up a fabulous session with Domina Emilia.
The session was an unusual one for me, as we did a cuckold themed roleplay. I almost never do roleplaying in sessions, but it seemed quite natural and easy to slip into it with Domina Emilia. I think a big part of that was down to the very organized pre-session communication that she did over email, helping set the scene, explore the hot buttons and give appropriate jumping off points. I’ve always found the tease and denial aspects of cuckolding to be very exciting, but never thought it was a good fit for me in a professional dynamic. Domina Emilia showed I was wrong about that, and that the fantasy could be brilliantly spun in the constraints of a time limited session.
The session also featured another first for me – use of audio/video aids. They were very cleverly incorporated to aid the fantasy and set the mood. It made me curious about they could be used more as tools in sessions. Often we think about audio and video as a substitute for physical encounters, but why not play with the combination of them? Kinky play is a type of interactive theater, so why not make got a step further into a mixed media art form?
This image of Domina Emilia is from her twitter feed. If you’re interested in sessions in the London area then I’d absolutely recommend contacting her. I think she’d be a fabulous person to get to know and play more with.
Apologies for the lack of posts recently. This might have been the longest I’ve ever gone without a post. I was staying with friends in a fancy Scottish manor house. It had relaxing couches and people who’d supply snacks and a bottle of scotch at any hour of the day. That is great for happy, drunken social time, but bad for my liver and writing blog posts.
Being back in London hasn’t been much better so far, but hopefully normal service should be resumed soon. Until then I’ll leave you with this image from a tweet by maid marta. The artist is identified as Caregan. As someone who has spent a fair amount of time recently dealing with travel security, this has a particular appeal. Sadly, none of my interactions have been quite this exciting.
Autostraddle has an article on a topic that is very rarely covered in kink – The Unique Grief of Ending a BDSM Relationship. There are plenty of articles on starting BDSM relationships, and a far great number on actual kinky play within them, but very few cover the complexity and emotions in an ending. It’s written by a female dominant, but is less about the specifics of femdom and more about the dynamics that might affect the end of any kinky relationship. Not exactly sexy fun stuff, but interesting and well written.
This image is by Dirk Hooper and was created for Mistress Adreena. According to the original tweet it represents a happy memory from a session. I thought it was touching and sweet, but the emotion it captures also make it work in the context of this post. You can see more from Dirk Hooper at his site here.
Yahoo brought Tumblr for $1.1B in 2013. A few days ago it was sold for (allegedly) $3M. In between those times they managed to destroy a huge number of communities and alienate a major chunk of their users by banning adult content. Now I’m sure that enormous loss wasn’t purely due to the adult content ban – Yahoo were already writing the acquisition value down long before that – but you have to admit that it’s an impressive sequence of decision making. Less talented people might have settled for just losing money, or just pissing off their users, but it takes major skills to do both. For anyone worried about the impact on the executives involved in all this, fear not, they’re all still immensely wealthy multi-millionaires with well paid jobs. I’m sure that’ll be comforting for anyone whose site was trashed by the Tumblr rules changes.
I’ve no idea what image would best accompany this mini-rant, so I’ll pick something very hot and sexy from a Twitter user who is still advertising his Tumblr link. This is from a tweet by The Smutty Rogue. Apparently Nina is doing to Issac what Yahoo did to Tumblr.
This shot from Lady Pim is very cute and sexy. It has a lovely contrast between the sensual and the harsh.
As a personal aside, I do find it weird how things I don’t like in sessions can still continue to appeal to me visually. Blindfolds like this one are a good example. Enemas are another. Both of those are on my ‘meh’ list for kinky activities. Yet I still like the idea of them a lot.
I get how the idea of something can be exciting, but the reality of it disappointing when tried in play. That’s a fairly normal thing to happen. But how does the idea remain exciting beyond that? Somehow the reality never intrudes into the theoretical sexual fantasy.
Lady Pim is a Toronto based domme and her site for professional sessions can be found here.
Normally a domme staring into the camera rather than engaging with her submissive spoils an image. In this case the slightly disinterested look away really makes it work. The timing and impact of the pain is a minor and secondary issue compared to making sure the camera gets a good shot of her.
I found this in an old tumblr archive, but I’m fairly certain it’s from the CBT and Ballbusting site.