Fm – Page 49 – Femdom Resource

BED

Gloria Brame has put together a new directory site for listing BDSM educators and groups – BED (Brame’s Educators Directory). It provides not only contact details but also things like professional qualifications, past presentations, community memberships, etc. This strikes me as a fine idea, not only for people within the community, but also for people outside it looking for useful contact points.

The site also has some fascinating historical illustrations and photographs. I particularly liked the advertisement below from the section of circa 70’s and 80’s pro-dommes. The text on the left captures – in just a few lines – how much the world has changed. These days submissives starts complaining if a domme doesn’t answer their email in a day or two. In this case Domina Verushka required you to send her a letter, together with stamped and self addressed envelope for any reply. A tape of her voice is available for $12 – which is around $28 in today’s money. Allow 8 weeks for delivery. Makes spending a few bucks for the instant delivery of a video from a modern clip site seem like something of bargain.

Based on this website I believe that Mistress Verushka is actually still offering professional domination sessions. Which I think is awesome. These days she’s in NYC (Queens) and contactable via email. No eight week wait required.

Updated: My apologies to Mistress Verushka Mandrake. As she makes clear in this comment, she’s not the same as the San Francisco based Mistress Verushka from this ad. Should you be in the NYC area and wish to session with her, then I did at least get the link to her contact information correct.

Everyone’s Against Me

My weekend adventures in San Francisco have left me feeling a little tense. Nothing too excessive. Just the kind of mild tension where you bite a chunk out of your laptop and then start mindlessly humping the leg of the desk it’s sitting on.

I wrote a couple of days ago about my initial SF session with Mistress Iris. That left me, to phrase it delicately, somewhat on edge. My second session for the trip was with Domina Yuki. We’ve played together a lot in the past, and those sessions tended to skew towards traditional masochist play. This one did feature some CBT, electricity and a beautiful leather straitjacket, but was much heavier on tease and denial, with a particular emphasis on the denial. It’s one thing to be close to someone as desirable as Domina Yuki. It’s quite another to have her tease you about how frustrating that must be and yet deny any relief.

I don’t really cry in sessions. My standard response to pain is to yell or scream. Yet this session actually had me sobbing in frustration. Yuki even commented that I was pulling expressions she’d never seen from me before. I left the play space on a high of denial, with my whole body vibrating like a tuning fork.

Of course, the universe then chose to mess with me just a little more. Crossing Union square much later that night, a rather attractive young lady propositioned me with the idea that we might enjoy a mutually satisfying business arrangement back in my hotel room. That’s not normally my kind of scene, but just for a second or two some frustrated lizard brain cells were leaping up and down shouting “Do it! Do It!” Back at the hotel, having wrestled my id into submission and regretfully declined the ladies offer, the couple in the room next door then decided it was the perfect night for a marathon sex and spanking session. I was stuck there, horny beyond all measure, on a strict Scout’s honor of no touching, and all I can hear is endless slaps, grunts and cries of ecstasy. I probably should have put headphones on to drown them out but, like a rubbernecker at a road accident, I couldn’t drag myself away. I might not have had any orgasms recently, but the couple in room 541 certainly made up the averages for me.

This was a shot from our scene, with me leaning over a spanking bench and Domina Yuki on top. There’s a similar shot from the same angle that better shows off Yuki’s beautiful boots here. There was also a very hot short movie, but sadly I don’t have the bandwidth to host it here. If you can’t manage an in person session, but would like to see more of Domina Yuki and her scenes, then I’d suggest checking out her OnlyFans site. She posts a lot of great content to it.

A Small Dose of Sanity

I spend a lot of time on this blog writing about censorship and stupid regressive laws against sex and sexual expression. It therefore makes me happy to share a rare instance of legal common sense. Amazingly, it’s from the UK, where the obscenity laws have been revised to allow depictions of BDSM, watersports, fisting, face sitting, etc.

In recent years the UK has been leading the way in the crusade against pornography, so it’s heartening to see some small amount of sanity return. Credit to Myles Jackman and Pandora Blake for all their work and activism in this area.

In the circumstances, it seems only fitting to feature an image from Pandora’s own Dreams Of Spanking site. This is from a scene call The Training of Tai Crimson.

The Importance of Hydration

This tweet from Victoria Rage made me smile…

Every Domme about to attempt a golden scene has a secret stash of multiple beverages hidden away to better the odds of making things happen. Look hard enough and you can almost always tell what’s in store.

That’s very true. Whenever I spot a domme regularly swigging liquids during a scene, I have a pretty good idea of what’s to come. However, sometimes it turns out the domme was just feeling dehydrated, and then it’s a little disconcerting.

We’ll get to the end of the session and she’ll be – “Well that was fun. Take care. See you next time!” And I’ll smile, hug and wave goodbye, but internally I’ll be thinking – “Huh? What’s going on with all that liquid? Don’t tell me it’s simply going to be flushed down the toilet! What a waste.”

I’m not sure of the original source for this artwork, but I do like the caption. ‘Ah!’ indeed. But is that his satisfied exclamation or hers?

Extreme Breathplay

Rolling Stone magazine has an interesting article on waterboarding as a kink. It features Elise Graves, the bondage aficionado I played with and posted about last week.

Waterboarding is certainly a more extreme kink, although I think its intensity can vary dramatically depending on how it’s done. I actually experienced it a couple of times a few years back, but not in an inverted position and not with a huge amount of water. I was basically horizontal and could lift my head slightly, which meant the water tended to drain away from my nose and mouth. I suspect that makes a big difference to the degree of terror induced. The coldness of the water triggered the mammalian diver reflex, which combined with bondage and a D/s dynamic created quite an unusual and intense headspace.

It’s a kink I could never have indulged in during the years when America was actually using the technique to torture prisoners. That’s not entirely logical – what I did in a Seattle playspace had no bearing on what the government did thousands of miles away – but it felt wrong and immoral to get sexual kicks from something that was being used in such a horrible way. When I did eventually try a lightweight version of it, years after Obama banned its usage on prisoners, we still avoided any kind of interrogation dynamic or roleplay. That seemed too close to a terrible reality.

Of course water and cloth is just one way to take someones breath away. As this Rodzo artwork shows, there are other options.

A Not So Magical Elixir

I think it’s fair to say that a lot of men have an inflated and illogical opinion of the importance of their penis. Nothing else can explain the amount of time and energy that goes into jerking, edging, pumping, photographing, locking up, boasting about and sticking objects into them. If anyone ever invents a way to harness all that activity, we could solve the world energy crisis overnight.

After years spent in the sketchier parts of the internet, I thought I’d seen every possible male dick delusion. Of course, the world is always a weirder and more wonderful place than you can ever imagine – as this story about an Irishman with back pain reveals. He thought his penis had magical healing properties and spat forth a mighty elixir to cure his ills. More specifically, he thought that injecting his semen into his arm would cure his lower back pain.

I’d love to untangle the thought process behind this. Did he just think his dick was like a magical lamp, and rubbing it would produce a solution to all his problems? Or was there some solid scientific thinking behind it based on stem cells? After all stem cells therapy is a treatment, and stem cells come from embryos, and semen is involved in making embryos – so was he just cutting out the middle thing-that-might-end-up-a man? I also like the fact he was injecting his arm rather than the actual site of the pain. Doctors typically use the arm for inoculations and blood tests, so clearly he was just following conventional medical practice there. Wouldn’t want to do anything too crazy.

Perhaps my favorite part of the whole story was a doctor who “described the case as “unique” and said it demonstrated the risks of innovative treatments that are relied upon prior to clinical research in the form of phased trials.” Of all the things this case demonstrates, the need for proper clinical trials before injecting yourself with semen is probably not the take away I would have gone with.

Alice (from Alice In BondageLand) is clearly taking no chances here. With all powerful medicines it’s advisable to fit a tamper-proof lid and store them in a safe place. I think this household should be safe enough from an inadvertent semen overdose.

Bondage Therapy in Seattle

Bondage virtuoso Elise Graves has been in Seattle for the last few days. Primarily she was here to shoot for House of Gord, but she did reserve time for a couple of private sessions, and I was lucky enough to score one of them. A lovely mix of whipping, electrical play and bondage was the result. We didn’t get pictures, but fortunately for me, she did shoot them in her other session, as shown here. I’m not sure who the other Seattle submissive is, but my thanks to him for these shots. He appears to be doing a better job of handling the rope suspension than I did.

Rope isn’t normally my favored bondage medium. I realized today that a big part of that is the time it often takes. When I’ve limited time to play, and I’m paying by the hour, I somewhat resent burning a lot of the session getting into and out of bondage. The process can be enjoyable, but not as enjoyable as what comes afterward. Fortunately, with an expert like Elise, that becomes far less of an issue. I’ve played with a lot of word class dommes, but I think she’s the fastest rigger I’ve ever experienced. She very quickly pulled together well balanced positions, with just the right degree of stress.

Elise’s smile in this image is very indicative of the way she plays. There was a lot of happy positive energy in our scene today. This image is from her Bondage Liberate site. I found it via her twitter feed.

Tripping

On the face of it, this article about a poker player experiencing sensory deprivation to win a bet has nothing to do with femdom. However, I’m linking to it because sensory deprivation is definitely a kink and the hallucinations he experienced actually reminded me of some of my own experiences with that particular kink.

I’ve always been limited to a couple of hours of reduced senses, rather the days he went through. On the other hand, I mix in heavy bondage, pain and breath control, which certainly ups the intensity of the experience. A couple of times in the state I had a sense of space opening up around me, my consciousness drifting in a large dark void, with spinning yellow stars moving around me and away from me. In hindsight I’m surprised I didn’t freak out, particularly given that sensory deprivation is a pretty tough scene for me to handle at the best of times. I think I intuitively knew, much like the poker player in the article, that embracing the vision and relaxing into it was the key to handling it. If memory serves me correctly, it only lasted a short period before I was quickly snapped back to reality by the domme electrocuting my testicles. That’s always guaranteed to capture a man’s attention.

This image is from Lady Hinako. From her blog and twitter feed she’s clearly an expert at heavy bondage and sensory deprivation scenes. I particularly like the contrast in this image between the cute doll like figure and the obvious immobilization and sensory restriction the man inside is experiencing.

Memories of Warmer Days

It’s pretty wet, cold and gloomy across a lot of the US at this time of year. I’m pretty certain there are no visual cures for Seasonal Affective Disorder, but if there were, this would surely come close. It’s a lovely Spring picnic scene with an elegant lady and her helpful pet. Hopefully the inevitable ants will focus on picnic basket and not any dangling lower parts.

I’m not sure who the artist is. Reverse image search suggests the name ‘hisano’, but I couldn’t track down any sensible links to other work.

Anticipation

Some eye candy to start the week. For me, there’s a nice sense of anticipation contained in this image. It’s possible that this is during or at the end of a scene, but I think his pure unmarked flesh suggests it’s a starting point. A moment of focus and adoration before the toys in the background get deployed.

Given the setting, I’d guess this is a pro-domme scene. Unfortunately, I don’t have an attribution. If you can help out with that then please leave a comment.