Tag: Humor

Vacation

I’m taking a vacation over the next week. Hitting up some good restaurants and getting hit by a wonderful domme.

Normally, at this point, I’d say something about my posting being potentially more erratic than usual. However, given that posting is already pretty erratic these days, I doubt it’ll affect the blog. Getting away from home and work might even give me a bit more time to write. I’ll at least have a session or two to report on. Assuming I can avoid any of the seasonal bugs that are floating around that is.

While I go off to pack my case and figure out what gadgets go with what USB cords, I’ll leave you with this from Servitor. Hopefully, I’ll not oversleep and find myself in similar trouble.

Formal Coitus

This comic isn’t femdom but it did make me smile. It struck me that formal coitus would be a good alternative name for all sorts of kinky sex. That doesn’t typically involve monocles and top hats – unless your preferences run that way – but it does often involve protocols, outfits, negotiation and equipment. Plus, I like the idea of asking someone if they’d like to partake in a spot of formal coitus. Provided I can track down a fuck butler of course.

This is from Free Cheese Comix and by the artist  CJ Cusack. I stumbled across if via Reddit.

More Cut Aways

If you liked the cut away Femdom house I featured last month then I’ve good news! The artist – KouYou – has done a whole series of them. You can find them on Twitter – #1, #2, #3, #4 and #5. I think they’re fabulous. Inventive, funny and yet still kind of hot.

In this one (the 5th one in the series) I particularly like the femdom fighting game that’s being played in the top right room. Plus, bonus cats hanging out with them.

This one time at Orchestra Practice

Writing the previous post on a minor wardrobe malfunction reminded me of a far more traumatic event many years back.

I was a teenager and attending school orchestra practice for my first and – with hindsight – only time. My given instrument was the cello, which I played really, really badly. However, the music teacher must have been particularly desperate for warm bodies and had invited me to join. I was surprised and intimidated to discover that the majority of the orchestra members were girls, mostly from the year or two above mine. This was not a crowd I was used to hanging with.

As I lurked around the edge of the music room I began to wonder if this could be an exciting new world for me. I was shy and terribly nervous about approaching girls. Was orchestra was the way in? Maybe if I actually started practicing, rather than trying to jam a week’s worth of work into the hour before each lesson, I could make a place for myself here. Could the hated cello turn out to be my path to romantic bliss?

As I contemplated these new possibilities a tall older girl detached herself from her group of friends and walked over to me.

“Tell me,” she said, loud enough for all to hear. “Do you often walk around with your trousers undone?”

Glancing down I realized that my zip had chosen the perfect moment to fail. My trousers were agape and my briefs on display to the school’s brass and string sections. Romantic bliss suddenly looked very unlikely. I fled to the washroom to effect some repairs and somehow made it through the practice. A few days later I had stroke of luck – I broke my arm. That wasn’t exactly pleasant, but it got me out of playing the cello, the orchestra and my scene of shame. Every cloud has a silver lining.

That all  happened 30+ years ago and I still die inside when I think about it now. It sadly never transmuted itself into a kink. At least not for humiliation. If anyone wants to pull on a school uniform and beat me up, well that might be a different story.

Image is from Team Rinryu, the folks behind the Yapoo Market series.

Never A Kink Around When You Need One

I’m surprised I’ve never developed a humiliation kink. God knows, I’ve given myself enough opportunities.

My latest non-consensual attempt happened in my building’s elevator. I was heading out to get coffee, wrapped up warm against the chill of Seattle in April. A rather attractive younger woman got on, smiled at me and said hello. She kept glancing across at me, asking how my day was going and made some cheerful small talk about the weather. I wasn’t delusional enough to think she was flirting, but it’s always nice to have a positive interaction with neighbors. I walked up to my coffee shop in a cheerful mood. It wasn’t until I’d arrived and taken off my  black woolen hat that I realized that I’d put it on inside out. The white care label was sticking straight up on the top, like a giant surrender flag of lost dignity. No wonder she kept looking back at me. It’s not often you see a 50 year old man who still hasn’t figured out how to dress himself properly.

Here’s once answer to the problem of errant clothing – an official uniform and a domme who inspects every aspect of it extremely closely. That’d certainly help focus the mind of a morning. The drawing is – of course – by the brilliant Sardax.

Home of Heroes

If you live in Massachusetts and have a thing for female superheroes then I’ve got just the house for you. As featured in this Zillow Gone Wild thread, it features over 3,000 square foot of space, 4 beds, 4 baths and a quite astonishing number of life size superhero figures. There’s a couple of Catwoman, a Batwoman, a Wonder Woman, a Super Woman, a striking (if not exactly heroic) Maleficent and many more.

Oddly the rest of the house seems strangely conventional, without any pop culture or comic themes. Either the owner had a very specific kink or it’s a successful attempt to get some viral clicks for the original  listing. Personally I hope it’s the former, as it’s the kind of single minded kinky strangeness that I really appreciate.

Here’s a sample shot from the listing, with Wonder Woman and Catwoman standing guard over the hallway sideboard.