Humor – Page 18 – Femdom Resource

Losing her cherry

I’m slightly ashamed of what I’m about to do. I swore I’d never do it. Yet here, I am, about to link to a BuzzFeed article. The site whose sole purpose seems to be to show up in annoying unfunny facebook posts from people I can barely remember friending, is about to get click traffic from me, damn it.

The article in question – 34 GIFs that sum up your first sexual experience – isn’t even femdom, but it did make me laugh a lot (particularly #5 & #18). BuzzFeed stole it all from a reddit thread of course.

As a teenager I always thought sex would be this amazing and intensely pleasurable experience. In time I found out that while that can be true, getting there involves a fair amount of awkwardness, mistakes, messiness, embarrassing moments and humorous situations (those mostly in hindsight). That really doesn’t get mentioned as much as it should.

I leave you with a shot of a lady about to lose her cherry. I hope he’s gentle (for his sake).

This image is from the photographer H Morgen.

Normal service will be resumed shortly

I believe the last week or so has been my slowest posting rate since I started this blog. A double header of vacation and sickness will do that for you. Fortunately I’m back in Seattle now, and so if I can just shake off this damn bug, I can get back to posting more normally.

Despite my germ cursed state, I did manage to indulge in some kinky play in San Francisco. I’ll be blogging about that in coming posts. I’ve also some photographs and a short video to share, assuming I can figure out how to edit and convert it appropriately. In the meantime, while I go hunt down some NyQuil, I’ll leave you with something that made me smile. I think it’s by the artist Bathgate21 who also did this drawing. Pepé Le Pew is notorious for not taking ‘No’ as an answer. Perhaps some time as bottom to Bugs will cure him of that.

Two plums for teacher

Tradition dictates that teachers should be given an apple. I’m not sure if this student forget or if she just decided to grab something extra. He looks kind of old to be in the classroom, but I think it’s clear he still has a lot to learn.

I found this on the Superior Women tumblr. I’m afraid I’ve failed to track down an original attribution. All the reverse images searches come back with links to MILF porn, which I find kind of amusing, given that there’s probably not a big difference in their respective ages.

Wrist deep

Here’s another post for the fisting file. This is an image I feel I should have organized a captioning competition for. That pose and that expression just cry out for it. My personal entry might have been – “Hmmm. That’s odd. So if I didn’t leave my car keys here, just where did I leave them?” Or possibly – “That noisy new couple upstairs are screwing again. I can hardly hear myself fist down here.” If neither of those grab you, feel free to leave far better alternative in the comments.

The other thing that amuses me about this image is the rubber gloves she’s wearing. They’re identical to the type my mother has purchased for years to do the washing up in. Everytime she visits me a pair magically turn up next to my sink. I never imagined them possessing a kinky purpose, and I think seeing a domme pull them on would be very weird.

I’ve no idea where this image is from. Reverse image searches tell me nothing. So if anyone can help attribute it then please leave a comment.

Update: In response to those pink gloves Tim (via a comment) provided a link to this video. It’s not femdom, but it is sexual in a weird way, and it made me laugh. I wondering if fisting is on his agenda?

Fisting injuries

Apparently fisting can be dangerous. If you’re not careful the dominant might end up laughing so hard that she bumps her head. That’s at least according to this post by Rain DeGrey.

I’ve never tried fisting and, after reading her post, I can’t say I’m in a big hurry to. The intensity of it sounds a little intriguing but more disturbing. I’ve gone icy cold during heavy play, and experienced pins and needles in non-constricted extremities as my body pulls back blood into its core. But I’ve never experienced the kind of brief blindness that Rain describes. I suspect that would freak me the hell out.

The charming sequence of images below are by the artist Gracy Gimp. They are actually from a sequence of 9 images titled Adèle & Lambert. Shown below is the first four and the very final one (click to enlarge any of them). The missing intermediate drawings are numbered 5, 6, 7 and 8.

A pig led relationship (plr)

I found these images via this Eros Blog post, which led me to this article and finally to the gallery page of the artist Emily Rangel. These kind of parodies always work best when they have a natural fit with the characters conventional personalities, and I think the artist chose wisely here. It’s easy to picture Miss Piggy as a top, and they’d make for a well matched D/s couple. Or should that be P/f couple?

The article claims these sculptures will ‘haunt your dreams’. That doesn’t worry me at all. I have weirder dreams than this all the time. My problem is that since I first saw these, several hours ago now, I’ve had that damn Mahna Mahna muppets song stuck in my head (original version here). All together now: Do doo be-do-do, Mahna Mahna, Do do-do do, Mahna Mahna, Do doo de-do-do de-do-do de-do-do de-do-do-doodle do do do-doo do!

What a feeling

A couple of weeks ago I was ragging on guys wearing socks in femdom shots. Today it’s the women’s turn. Or rather a particular woman’s turn, as this is (hopefully) a singular example rather than a trend.

I like this image. I like her feet on his arms, that’s a powerful position. But what’s the deal with her legwear? The 80’s style leg warmers are odd enough (although I’ve been told by fashionable friends they’re coming back), but what’s with the chrome studded leather things? Has she got leather ankle warmers? They don’t look like standard bondage cuffs, so I can only assume it’s flashdance style interpreted as fetishwear. I can’t see it catching on.

Tracking down an attribution for this image was a little strange. It’s all over tumblr, and I originally found it on the Slave Of Elena tumblr. However, doing a Google reverse image search just returned dozens of blogs, but no original source. That is until I noticed that Google claimed to have edited their results based on the DMCA, and pointed me at this copyright complaint. So based on that, I’m guessing the image is from the X-Art site. I’m not sure if it’s ironic, amusing or depressing that it was the copyright take down notice that allowed me to work that out. Hopefully I will not end up as one of the sites added to that DMCA notice.

Oh, and for anyone wondering about the post title, I give you a little taste of the 80’s. It was the kind of movie that I hated as a child, but it seems like a quaint period piece now.

Paddling the pigskin

I’m back again in Seattle after suffering through a much delayed flight. Apparently in my absence some sort of sporting event occurred. I’m with Dan Savage on this particular issue…

The team that happens to be located in the city I happened to relocate to 20 yrs ago for non-football-related reasons is ahead!
From Dan’s Twitter Feed

I’ve actually been a 49ers fan since I was a kid, so I lost most of my interest in the proceedings after the NFC championship game a couple of weeks ago. However, it does give me a chance to feature some football themed femdom. Perhaps the Denver cheerleaders should have given this a shot? It certainly would have made for a more entertaining show, and it couldn’t have made things any worse.

I’m afraid I don’t know the artist. I found it on the Femdom Artists site.

Transurethral probing

This post is shamelessly cribbed from Mistress Matisse’s twitter feed. I consider it ecological blogging. Recycling for the good of the planet and my readers.

In her tweet she linked to an amusing and thoughtful video by Sarah Silverman on women’s reproductive rights. Sarah mocks the transvaginal ultrasound procedure that some states are trying to legislate, and suggests men should get a metal probe and camera shoved down their penis prior to masturbating. As Matisse points out, that’s not guaranteed to turn a guy off. In fact, in many cases they’ll probably enjoy it.

The unfortunate gentleman in the image below appears to have suffered a terrible facial injury. I’m not quite sure how sticking a tube into his urethra is going to help with that, but I assume the nurse knows what she’s doing. After all, they wouldn’t let any random unqualified young lady wear an official medical uniform like that one.

This is from the CBT and Ballbusting site.

A good hard cuddle

Words can’t express how much I like this sequence of images (click to enlarge them). It’s cute, funny and very sexy. I love the ‘Pat Pat’ moment, his deadpan response and the “Do it more. Do it harder” finale.

It’s also a good example of playing with gender asymmetry in a sexual situation. What if it had been a guy sitting there with his dick sticking out, a big grin on his face offering to give his girlfriend a cuddle? Then it would have been creepy and disturbing. This subverts the stereotype that women want to cuddle and guys want to screw, and is all the hotter because of it.

I believe the artist goes by the handle Cute*Blue. He or she has a tumblr and a website but I can find very little biographical information.