Tag: m

Her Cutie Pie

I’m continuing my theme of interesting things I’ve found on twitter. This is from Lady Hinako’s feed. You can even see a short video clip of the scene. The post title comes from that tweet.

I always feel that when I post images like this, I need to slather it in disclaimers. I have this mental image of someone dipping their toe in femdom, browsing this site and thinking that this represents the kind of activity they’ll need to get involved in. Or a domme seeing this and getting annoyed that the only representations of femdom are leather clad porn stars or shots like this of extreme play. I do get that, but at the same time, I love that there are people out there doing crazy stuff. It’s not so much that I want to do this myself – although I kind of do – but that I always enjoy seeing people pushing boundaries and exploring their desires. We should applaud the passionate and the unusual. They make the world a more interesting place.

Drool

Mistress Sidonia has put together a very comprehensive list of gag types, spread across a pair of posts here and here. It’s a handy reference for anyone looking for new toys or techniques to try, as well as those who like to go through lists ticking off what they’ve tried to date.

One thing that always amuses me about gags is how many dommes love the drool they produce. There may be some dommes out there who don’t care about gag drool, but if there are, I’ve never met them. I’ve seen plenty of dommes complaining about submissives slobbering over their feet or dribbling onto their outfits, but somehow gag drool is never an issue. It’s either hot, funny, cute or all of the above.

This image is by Joachim Baldauf for Paper Planes magazine.

Cross Promotion

I received a strange but amusing sales pitch the other day. A Sarah from the ‘Crazy Pet Guy’ blog wanted to write a guest post here. Apparently she thought there was a fair amount of overlap between her pet themed site and mine. Suggested topics included:

  • When Should You Give Up and Call a Dog Trainer?
  • How to Prepare Yourself for Dog Adoption
  • The Importance of Consistency in Dog Training: Why It Works

I get a fair number of these kind of guest post requests. A few are from other kink sites, which do actually have overlap with this one. Most are random spam emails that are clearly the result of dumb algorithms. This is clearly the latter case, but it’s also the first one that is both entirely unrelated and yet weirdly appropriate. I’m fairly certain Sarah doesn’t want to write about training a human puppy, or the importance of consistency in slave training, yet I was strongly tempted to reply with a few suggested kinky topics for her to work with. After all – when is it appropriate to give up on your human puppy and call a professional domme in? Should you rub their noses in it? Is it ever appropriate to spank them with a newspaper? How do you stop inappropriate leg humping? And is crueler to use a chastity cage or simply neuter them?

I’m afraid I don’t have a source for this image.

Shibari with a Difference

The large majority of shoots featuring fancy Shibari suspension bondage also feature lithe young Asian women. I’m certainly not going to start complaining about those kind of shoots, but it is nice to see one with a different kind of model. The ropework is obviously impressive, but so is his ability to pull off this position. I think I’ll need several more years of yoga before I can take a shot at something similar.

The model is Michel, the rigging is by Misungui, and you can see more images from the same session in her tumblr post here.

The head and other stuff

I love the construction and elegance of this drawing. There’s a striking contrast between the detail used for the head and the sparse but expressive lines used for the body and cock.

One of the oddities of BDSM is that there are endless tortuous and inventive things that can be done to all the different part of the body, yet it often ends up being about what’s happening in the head. I don’t mean in the slightly cliched sense of the brain being the biggest erogenous zone, but that intense sensations cause a turning inwards and a focus on a sense of self. When pushed hard I often feel I retreat to my head and inner-consciousness, with my body becoming abstract and somewhat distant. This drawing captures a little bit of that feeling for me.

The artist is Robert Richards. His work almost exclusively features men, but feel free to imagine a hot dominant woman in an exciting outfit of your choice just slightly out of frame in this picture.

Keep it simple

Predicament bondage is often shown in very complex set ups – like those in my last two posts. The kind of thing that looks like you need to be a cross between a structural engineer and a mad scientist to pull off. But it need not be like that. I remember doing a scene with my hands bound behind me while I was trying to hold a coin against a wall with my nose. That was an interesting predicament to hold, particularly when the caning started.

The shot below shows another simple technique, using something sharp under the heels. In this case its a pair of spiked wallpaper strippers placed there by Miss Deelight. The rest of the set-up (as shown in this post) is more complex, but this element of the predicament would be easy set-up in the comfort of your own home.

Miss Deelight is a pro-domme based in South Whales and the South West of the UK.

CBT for the curious

I’m  regularly surprised by the extent to which discussion on specialized BDSM play has spread to mainstream sites. For example, here’s a recent Refinery29 article on Cock and Ball Torture. OK, so Refinery29 isn’t exactly the New York Times, but I doubt a few years ago you’d have seen anything on CBT outside of specialized kink sites. I don’t think I knew what CBT was until I started physically exploring BDSM and actually arranging to play. Now anyone can read about it next to articles on health, entertainment and politics.

As articles go it’s not a bad one, given the obvious constraints on space and detail. However, it does suffer from a problem I see in a lot of these mainstream articles – treating the sensual and the sadistic separately. They often seem to treat kink as something you do by taking a break from regular sensual sex to try this sadistic and painful thing. In my experience very few masochists like cold, brutal and unmodulated pain. And those that do, probably aren’t taking tips from Refinery29 articles. For most of us it’s the blend of pleasure with pain, and the ratcheting up of sensation as the balance tip back and forth between them.

I think the best advice for a CBT curious couple would be to start with the pleasure. Get him hot and bothered with the tongue or the hand, and then mix in some squeezing, pinching or slapping. Someone horny and eager is going to be less self conscious about what they’re doing and more likely to relax into the moment. Wait till he’s panting, then put some clothespins on the shaft or sack and slowly masturbate him. That mixture of lovely friction and painful tugging gives a lot of scope for shifting the pain/pleasure balance. It also sets up the right dynamic of control – giving pleasure and then taking it away. There’s also an obvious visual feedback mechanism as arousal ebbs and flows.

Don’t try this in your derelict barn

A suitable image to follow-up yesterday’s post. This is another elaborate rope suspension with a high difficulty/risk factor. It looks very cool for a photograph, but I can’t imagine it being sustainable for any kind of extended play.

BarnSuspensionI’m afraid I’ve no idea of the original source for this. Happy to credit appropriately if someone can help with an attribution.