Tag: Mainstream

Good Cop, Bad Cop

For those who have been following the Kristen Hyman saga I have bad news – she lost her fight to become a cop.

For those of you who have no idea who I’m talking about, let me provide some context. Kristen Hyman briefly worked as a pro-domme and produced some femdom movies under the title Domina Nyx. I even featured an image of hers back in 2012. After quitting that career, she went on to train as a police officer. She was just days away from graduating when somebody blabbed about her past life and she was suspended. There was the standard sensationalist coverage in the press, with their usual hypocrisy of stigmatizing sex workers while using their stories to make money. Now, after spending significant time and money to qualify as a policewoman, she is out of a job.

I hadn’t covered the story up to this point because I was hoping she get re-instated and I didn’t want to add to the publicity on her past life. Now, with her name plastered across hundreds of tabloid articles and immortalized online, that seems kind of moot.

The reason I mention it at all, is to highlight the challenges sex workers face and the sacrifices they make. Society disparages their profession, criticizes their decisions and forces them to operate without the proper protection the law should provide. Then, even when they move onto jobs deemed more ‘worthy’ by society, the sex work they did can still be used as a cudgel against them. And why? Because they gave sexual pleasure to others while earning money for themselves and their families? How fucked up is that? They should be handing out medals, not blocking them from worthwhile careers.

The artwork is of course by the incomparable Eric Stanton.

The Customer is Always Ignored

I’ve posted before on what a mecca Beverly Hills is for high heel fans. I think it’s also a great destination for fans of being ignored or humiliated.

I was browsing in one of the high end department stores here today. All the male sales assistants had been their useful effusive helpful selves. Any section I wandered into would generate a greeting and an offer of assistance. Then I crossed into an area run by a rather striking lady. She was a tall attractive brunette, sporting tight leather pants with knee high boots. That’s the kind of look that’ll catch my eye in any situation. I swear to God, she took one look and then visibly sneered at me. Some pro-dommes would have killed to capture her expression at that particular moment in their gallery pages. There was a slight disdainful wave away with her hand, and then she went back to chatting to her friend. Who, I might add, was sporting some outrageously high heels of her own.

For some submissives this might have been a major thrill. For me, I took my business elsewhere. If she’d come across and started bossing me around, she probably could have sold me any number of ridiculously over-priced Italian jackets.

This is Karen Elson in a shoot for Vogue magazine by Steven Klein. I found it here.

How to Deal with Men

This NYTimes article is pretty much perfect link fodder for this blog. It features an ex-dominatrix teaching a class for women on how to tackle power imbalance when dealing with men in conversation and negotiation. I particularly like the fact that the course apparently draws on BDSM, Taoist martial arts and Cesar Millan’s book on dog training. I love the idea of a woman in a business meeting sternly telling a loud man to sit down and be quiet, and then tossing him a biscuit from her handbag.

One quote that I did find slightly surprising was this…

“If I’m in control of you, my attention is outward, so precisely fixed on the other person that I almost forget I exist,” Ms. Urbaniak told the audience. If you’re submissive, “your attention is focused inward, on yourself and your feelings.”

I found that curious, because that’s pretty much the opposite of how I function. When I’m deep in a submissive mind set my focus is intensely on the domme. Everything else floats away, my body is no longer mine and she’s the center of my universe. Conversely, when I’m being forceful in a work situation, my focus originates from a sense of self and confidence in my knowledge and expertise.

If you’re interested in the classes, they’re run by Kasia Urbaniak from something she calls The Academy. I’ve obviously no idea of their efficacy, but I do appreciate the goals and sentiment behind them.

I found this image via some random tumblr, but I believe that’s London based Mistress Evilyne with one of the ‘Boss’ mugs.

Parallel Universe

Photographer Eli Rezkallah has created an amusing twist on sexist vintage advertising in a series called Parallel Universe. I’m sure a lot of my readers will have encountered his inspiration material in articles like this one. It’s classic clickbait, guaranteed to both amuse, appall and make you marvel how far the world has moved on. He’s taken specific original ads and reshot them with a gender reverse.

I like the idea, but can’t help feeling that there’s a missed opportunity for the companies here. A lot of them are still around. For example, you can still buy Chase & Sanborn coffee, creators of the original ad below. They should reshoot their ad themselves with the gender reverse (or use just Eli’s version) and issue it as a new ad. They could claim it was a both a joke and an implicit acknowledgement of their past mistakes. It’d get loads of publicity  and generate social media controversy – both of which appear to be the primary goals of modern advertising.

The Safeword is ‘Thief!’

This article title really captures the whole story – ‘Woman disguised as dominatrix ties man to his bed and robs him‘. Apparently a German man managed to get both financial domination and bondage packed into a single session. The bondage was consensual, but the 1800 Euro theft less so.

I can’t say I’ve ever been worried about theft, given I always play with well established professionals. However, I do sometimes wonder what would happen if something went wrong after I’ve been wrapped in rope. Often that thought strikes me as the domme is trying to balance in high heels while clambering around the bondage table several feet off the ground. I doubt I’d be much of a Houdini is there was a fall and I had to try and escape to get help for her.  Fortunately, another benefit of playing with experienced dommes is that they’re experts in maneuvering in impractical footwear.

I’m going to go out on a limb here, and predict that the thief in the original article is not an expert rigger. I picture the scene unfolding a little like this vintage bondage shot. She came equipped with rope and it was probably more clothesline than the specialized hemp based stuff.

I’m afraid I don’t know the creator of this image. For anyone who complains about the bondage in porn today, keep in mind that back in 70’s it was hard to find and looked like this when it did show up (so I’m told).

Should have used more lube

I had all sorts of serious posts to write today. Yet here I am, featuring this image from CNN. I just couldn’t resist it. Great headline? Or the greatest headline?

I can only assume that Senator Collins was wielding something like the weapon below and was sparing on the lube. Poor Donald. It does of course beg the question – what would his safeword be? Typically you’d pick something you’d never say accidentally. So I guess “Sorry” would work pretty well.

Wanted: Friendly Barista with Warm Hands

I’m beginning to think that Gwyneth Paltrow has a fetish for getting people to put odd things into their intimate places. There was the vaginal steaming, then the jade eggs and now it’s coffee enemas. Given the amount she charges for this stuff, there might also be an element of fin-domme going on as well.

While some of us would find daily life tough to face without our regular caffeine fix, it’s probably best to avoid taking it anally. The same goes for that other popular social beverage – alcohol. Not sure what the science says about the scene below though. I’m going to guess doctors would cite a lack of prior data and urge caution.

This is the lovely Mistress Eleise De Lacy in a shot for Femme Fatale Films.

Cate Blanchett in Leather

This photoshoot from Sean & Seng for 032c magazine isn’t exactly femdom. In fact there’s a couple of images in there of Cate in Shibari style bondage. But I did like this particular shot of her sporting a leather jacket and just a glimpse of her boot tops showing. It’s considerably better than the outfit she was stuck with for the recent Thor movie. It’s quite an achievement to cast Cate Blanchett as the Goddess of Death, dress her in a tight leather catsuit, and have her look as silly as this. Admittedly, it works better in action, but it still seems a missed opportunity. The Dark Knight Rises might have been a ridiculous movie, but at least they knew how to get a tight leather costume right.

 

St. Vincent

The image below is promotional material from St. Vincent and her current tour for Masseducation. It popped up on my vanilla facebook feed (probably because she’s playing Seattle next month), but the kinky elements made me briefly wonder if I’d crossed the streams with my kinky social media life. She’d definitely sporting the kind of stare that features on many pro-domme gallery pages.

If you like this image then her video for Los Ageless has some similar themes. I only started listing to her music recently, but I’ve enjoyed what I’ve found so far.

A National Treasure

I’m always fascinated by stories that capture a unique aspect of a particular culture. For example, in the US articles arising from the gun control debate are both common and unique to its culture. Nowhere else is that kind of discussion happening. This story from Japan last year was another example of a story that could seemingly only be written in that country. Nowhere else allows hardcore pornography while simultaneously prosecuting someone distributing an abstract mathematical model of the female genitalia.

The latest example I have is from France – who just declared the Marquis de Sade’s manuscript of 120 Days of Sodom a National Treasure. I can’t think of many countries whose politicians would he happy to declare a snuff pornography book – featuring teenage girls being tortured to death and children raped – as a national treasure. I don’t state it in that way to necessarily say there were wrong to do it, just to emphasize the cultural dissonance. Even by modern standards, Sade’s work remains shocking and unpleasant. While I can imagine a lot of politicians owning and jerking off to a copy, I can’t imaging many outside of France speaking up to defend its cultural value.

Sade of course gave us the word sadism, which gives me an excuse to feature a nice sadistic image. I’m not exactly sure what’s just happened in the scene below to make him dance like that – I’m guessing that riding crop she’s holding was involved somehow – but it certainly looks like it hurts.

I believe this is originally from the Sado Ladies site.