Photograph – Page 199 – Femdom Resource

The delicate touch

I like this shot for the very delicate way she’s handling the situation. Part of the hotness of chastity play comes from the importance of the cock. It’s not just a piece of meat. It’s the focal point for a male’s sexuality. As Ferns recently wrote when describing chastity play…

he became sensitised in a way he had never been before, his entire way of walking around in the world changed, his view of himself changed, his relationship with his sexuality was emphasised, and I was the owner of all of it.

Often chastity shots emphasize the key or the device, but neglect the erotic and sexual nature of the play. In contrast, this shot really captures those elements for me. The delicacy and sensitivity of the appendage is highlighted, with her focus obviously on the man himself, and not the nuts and bolts of the device.

I found this on the Volens Datorem tumblr. It’s originally from The Kinky English Lady, Miss Hybrid.

Tease and denial with chocolate chips

This is a bit of a silly photograph sequence, but it made me smile. It features Ember of the Suicide Girls conducting a tease and denial session with Sesame Street’s cookie monster.

Of course the Sesame Street characters are always ripe for parody. There’s the Avenue Q take-off and porn song, which in the weird cyclical nature of the Internet has been reworked back to the original Muppet characters. I also always enjoyed Dave Chappelle’s riff on it.

Prickly

I’m back in Seattle and feeling a bit prickly. This isn’t slang for a bizarre new sexual practice, or a skin disease I picked up from a dirty airplane toilet, but the result of the last session I did in LA before returning home. It was with Mistress Cynthia Stone, a very beautiful and talented domme. She has an extremely direct, forceful and natural style of play. Some dommes, particularly in a first session with an unknown submissive, can come across as a touch scripted and task orientated. They’ll want to work through the list of agreed activities over the prescribed time. This doesn’t necessarily mean the activities won’t be fun, or the session will be bad, but it can emphasize the artificial aspect of the play. A sense that something is being done to you, rather than with you.

This is never an issue when I play with Lydia in Seattle. She has a very instinctive style, working from a plan but improvising as necessary, adapting to the submissive’s reactions. Mistress Stone seemed to play in a very similar fashion, working around a set of ideas, but in a loose natural way. My prickles are a result of her improvisation, and her momentary annoyance at what she described as ‘the pelt’ around my cock and balls. It was interfering with her desire to shove needles into them, and before I knew it, a razor had been produced. Five minutes later and ‘the boys’ were doing their best Kojak impression. Her piercing play was much enhanced and I’m now left with an interesting rasping noise every time I cross my legs.

The shaving in the image below is happening a few feet higher than mine was, but I think it’s an appropriate image all the same. Sitting back and offering your throat to a straight razor definitely has trust and submission aspects. Not to mention that Mistress Stone threatened to bring her straight razor along for the next time she wants to give me a trim.

I came across this image originally on the Real Dominant Women tumblr.

See no evil, speak no evil

Today is sadly the last day of my vacation before returning to Seattle. Fortunately I’ve had a very pleasant trip, enjoyed some kinky fun, and met some interesting new people. I played with two different dommes, and got some nice piercing photographs from a session yesterday that I’ll share in a later post. In the meantime, while I pack, I’ll leave you with a picture I liked from the Thou Shall Love Thy Mistress tumblr.

From a masochist’s point of view this shot is pretty weak sauce. Those clothe pegs don’t look like they’d hurt much at all. Despite that, I like it for the fact she’s clearly getting enjoying his restrained and sensory deprived position. I always love the idea of a sadist getting off on what she’s doing. Pain that comes from anger and other negative emotions never does anything for me.

Darkly dreaming

Here’s a disturbing and ambiguous image. Which makes it my favorite sort of image.

It reminds me of the show Dexter, although in this case with a female lead. There’s a plastic wrapped room, a bound figure, a trickle of blood and a slightly distant and emotionally neutral figure capturing a trophy of the moment. I found it on the Selina Minx’s Musings tumblr, but I can’t find an original source for it. I’d love to know the initial context for the shot. There’s a real beauty in the symmetry of the figures, spatially and otherwise.

Good. Bad. I’m the guy with the blog.

I had an interesting day today. I had hot sweaty sex (of the non-kinky kind) with a gorgeous blonde. That was good. I had my rental car towed and had to retrieve it from the impound lot. That was bad *. I had a 13 course meal in a French/Californian restaurant. That was good. The meal may have contained potassium benzoate, that would be bad.

I have no idea what image would be appropriate for all that. But I’ll go for a shot of a hot sweaty blonde from the undah-wear tumblr. It’s not strictly a femdom shot, but I’m guessing I’m not going to be the only submissive male turned on at the image of a sweaty female body. The term ‘sniffer’ is often used in a derisory fashion, but I think scent is a much under appreciated part of sex. It pushes buttons deep in the brain that the other senses just can’t get near.

Oh, and 10 bonus femdom points for the first person to get the post title reference. It’s an easy one, but I can’t resist the quote.

* It turns out to be particularly tricky to retrieve your car when you picked it up in the early hours of the morning from a rental agency and have no idea what the license number is. Or the color. Or the model. Or even the number of doors. It had a drivers door, so I’d stopped caring once I’d initially established that fact. Combine all that with an automated traffic system with the phone menu from hell, and you can imagine the level of frustration created. I might be a masochist but even I have my limits.

Travelling

I’m taking a few days vacation, so posting may be a little more erratic than usual. I’m planning to enjoy some really good food, excellent cocktails and hopefully a decent amount of kinky play. Between all that, I might manage to bash out the odd post or two.

In the meantime I’ll leave you with this shot I found on the Strawberry Mistress tumblr. It features a rather well muscled gentleman and an elegantly poised lady. As the British expression would go, she has a fine set of pins on her. It also taught me that July 24th is International Femdom Day, something I was previously unaware of. I’m looking forward to it already.

CMNF

At first I thought this was a gentle teasing shot. She’s naked and beautiful, but he can’t see a thing, and only feels what she allows him to. Then I saw that big knife on the windowsill. Now I’m not really sure what to make of it. I still like it a lot, but there’s an interesting ambiguity to it.

I found this on Homer’s blog. Which, at the time I’m typing, has this truly fabulous title image.

There is no ‘I’ in domme

I find subtext and subconscious communication fascinating. Picking apart what people say to expose what they really mean has an intellectual and an emotional satisfaction to it. I was therefore particularly interested in this article on the linguistic analysis of function words, the tiny building blocks (I, the, there, this, etc.) that tie sentences together. We don’t pay them much attention, but it turns out they have interesting predictive properties. For example, when two people are attracted to each other they alter their style of speech to harmonize their usage of these words. What was particular interesting in the context of this blog was the following discovery.

…some of his most interesting work has to do with power dynamics. He says that by analyzing language you can easily tell who among two people has power in a relationship, and their relative social status.
“It’s amazingly simple,” Pennebaker says, “Listen to the relative use of the word “I.”
What you find is completely different from what most people would think. The person with the higher status uses the word “I” less.

This is one of those findings that at first seems counter-intuitive, but actually makes a lot of sense in hindsight. In my own experience at work I see that dynamic all the time. Somebody in my organization reporting a problem to me is likely to say “I investigated X. I think it’s broken.” The both claims credit for work done (I made the effort) while simultaneously softening the message (I think this, but you may think differently). My response is likely to be “We need to fix this”, which actually means “You need to fix it.” What I’m unlikely to say is “I think it needs fixing.” That implies a personal opinion, and that potentially some other opinion out there matters and a decision can’t yet be taken. The impersonal or the plural form is actually a far stronger phrasing. Religions have of course known this for years. Jesus didn’t say “I think the meek are blessed. In my opinion they should inherit the earth. Although they may have trouble hanging onto it.” *

I’d be interested to hear from my readers if these observations match the experience of those in ongoing D/s relationships. In the meantime I’ll leave you with an image (courtesy of Geek Domme) featuring a happy domme and a submissive who doesn’t look to be in a position to make use of any pronouns or function words. Unless ‘Owww!’ or ‘Eeek!’ counts as a function word.

* That last part of the phrasing might be a touch inaccurate. I’m not too up on my biblical quotes.

Can’t get no respect

I’m not quite sure how I found my way to this article on the you beauty site. God knows I need all the beauty tips I can get, but it’s not exactly my regular web browsing fodder. I suspect it was something to do with the 50 shades of grey (or of bleauh) spillover into the mainstream media. However I got there, I ended up being both amused and annoyed by the articles take on BDSM.

The amusing bit was this…

In a study Hawley presented this March, the results indicated another interesting conclusion about submissive fantasies. Handing over the reins to your partner isn’t just a sexual desire exclusive to women. Men like when women take control in the bedroom.

There’s a penetrating insight if ever I saw one. Elements of the BDSM community might get annoyed by professional dominatrices being the common face of femdom, but you have to admit they are at least a very public face. It’s hard to imagine anyone not being aware of their existence. And if you know they exist, who do you think is paying them all the money?

The annoying bit was this…

The research found no evidence that wanting to be dominated is synonymous with masochism, for either gender. In other words, submission and self-respect can easily go hand-in-hand.

So apparently masochism is associated with a lack of self-respect. Did I miss the memo on this? I’ve always thought it was related to the way pain can be processed, but then again what’s my opinion worth? I’m just a useless masochist.

I’ll leave you with a shot of a man letting his partner take control in the bedroom. I’m not sure if he’s nobly submitting or masochistically denigrating himself. Either way, I like the image.

I found this on the Mina’s Kinks tumblr.