The beauty of dominant women
Normally a domme staring into the camera rather than engaging with her submissive spoils an image. In this case the slightly disinterested look away really makes it work. The timing and impact of the pain is a minor and secondary issue compared to making sure the camera gets a good shot of her.
I found this in an old tumblr archive, but I’m fairly certain it’s from the CBT and Ballbusting site.
I’m continuing the corporal theme for just one more post. I love this image for the contrast it presents with most online erotica. Mistress Inka is sitting in a comfortable chair, in a regular room, in a dress that not only covers every inch of her body but obscures even her shape. Yet it’s still wonderfully sexy.
I also think it’s also another example of how loose the link between kink, culture and personal experience can be. This has a real Victorian governess feel to it. I’m guessing nobody reading this had a governess, and certainly nobody had a Victorian one. Yet the image and dynamic still works. Certain archetypes persist, drawing on underlying desires that we may not even be aware of. The image uses an idea from the past, but that’s really just camouflage to sneak in its kinky themes of punishment, control and desire.
Image is from this tweet. For the watermark, I assume it’s associated with Sissy Manor (main site here). Mistress Inka’s professional site is available here.
Speaking of kinky cause and effect – as I just was – corporal punishment and impact play is another interesting example of an arguably misattributed cause. It used to be said that the English love of spanking and flagellation was derived from the use of corporal punishment in school. As a theory, it seems to make sense. Boys just coming into adolescence and packed with sexual energy were being beaten, and then transmuting that trauma into a kink. Hence, we ended up with the English Vice.
The flaw in this claim is that corporal punishment has been banned from British schools for a long time now, yet it still seems to be as popular as ever in kink. It’s also popular across a wide range of countries, even those that didn’t think beating children was a good idea. Personally, I was never beaten as a child, but corporal punishment scenes featured heavily in my fantasies in my 20’s and 30’s.
Obviously to prove the case one way or another one would need to do a proper survey and analyze kinky preferences over time and culture. It’s possible that corporal scenes are a lot more popular with a certain type of older British male than in the rest of the kinky community. But my suspicion would be that while corporal punishment in school might have colored peoples kinks, anyone who ended up indulging in it later in life would have been kinky anyway. Those submissives who were spanked or caned as children draw a correlation, where those who weren’t simply shrug and don’t worry about why they like it.
I’m afraid I’ve no idea who shot this picture of this happy lady caner.
It’s often said that taboo subjects are a great source of kinks. Making something forbidden or secret gives it power, which in turn makes it alluring to our sexual subconsciousness. It’s a view that I’m skeptical of. There’s probably some truth in it, but it seems overstated.
The fact that kinks often involve taboo subjects doesn’t necessarily mean that the taboo is the cause of them. Correlation is not causation. For example, using mommy/daddy terms in quasi-incest roleplay is clearly a socially taboo area, but maybe people are simply kinking on the power differential between adult authority figures and youngsters. Or on the contrast between expected relationship and the distorted kinky version of it.
To show that the allure of the forbidden is the underlying cause of a kink, you’d need to show how changing the social perception of a subject also changed how people kink on it. I really struggle to come up with an example of that. A few weeks ago I wrote about the lure of the ankle in Victorian Britain. It’s clear that over the last 100 or so years, women’s fashion has changed enormously. What was taboo to reveal is now commonplace. Yet I haven’t seen any sign that kinks around clothes and bodies has diminished at all. Women in very visible boots or high heels no longer scandalize society, but the footwear fetish isn’t going away.
Toilet play is another area where the taboo is often cited as causative. If that were the case, you’d expect kinky interest in it to vary in inverse proportion to the social stigma. Yet Japan has a mainstream museum of poo, complete with poo themed video games and souvenir poo on a stick. At the same time their pornography has no shortage of scatological content. It certainly seems a lot more common than in US porn, a country far more uptight about the who/how/when of its toilets. Rather than repression creating kinks, it almost seems the other way around.
This image is from Team Rinryu, creators of the Yapoo series. Their content is fairly extreme and often scatological in nature. This scene is obviously just a simple face sitting one – and absolutely nothing more than that.
I’ve already written about my upcoming UK trip and my ability to pick dates that don’t quite align with people I’d like to see. The flip side to that is also managing to pick dates so I miss kinky visitors to Seattle. Apparently the Pacific Northwest is at its most appealing when I’m not in it.
Two in particular caught my eye. Mistress Iris will be here Aug. 19th to the 21st. Lady Grace will be here from Aug. 14th to 17th. Mistress Iris I’ve played with multiple times in the past (e.g. here and here). Lady Grace is someone I’ve wanted to connect with for a while now. If you’re a submissive in Seattle then I’d urge you to set up time with them. Partly because I think you’ll have a lot of fun. Mostly because I want their Seattle trips to be a success so they come back again when I’m actually in town. So schedule a session and it’ll be a win-win-win situation.
This is from Lady Grace’s twitter feed. When she’s not visiting Seattle, she’s based in SF. Her professional site is here. Mistress Iris is based out of LA and her professional site is here.
I’ve always had a bit of a thing for Katherine Hepburn ever since seeing her in the African Queen as a young boy. Much as I enjoyed watching Bogart as the cranky captain, it was the spunky and bossy Hepburn character that really caught my eye. Much like the late great Lauren Bacall in her movies opposite Bogart.
This image is Katharine Hepburn as Amazon warrior princess Antiope in a stage production of The Warrior’s Husband (1932). The set might look a little shoddy, and their shin guards fake, but her pose and body language is all kinds of hotness. The lucky man whose hair she’s grabbing is Colin Keith-Johnston.
This post-session image comes courtesy of Domina Vivien Claire. I find it strangely arousing. It’s all so bright and clean and shiny. I picture the contrast between warm, soft, yielding flesh and how it’d be pinched and distorted by the hard cold metal. It’s an image that suggests the snap of rubber gloves and a voice murmuring “Try and relax. This next part might hurt…”
Vivien Claire is a pro-domme based in London Ontario. Her main site is here.
I had some great comments on my last post about approaching a professional playspace. Thanks to Simon, Hank and Chris for those. The encounter Simon described made me laugh…
I once visited a Mistress in her premises in London and as they were on the 3rd floor I got in the lift. With me in the lift was an older lady probably in her eighties. When I pressed for the 3rd floor she smiled at me and said “here to get your bottom smacked are we?” to which I could only reply with a wry grin.
I’m pretty certain all I’d be able to manage in those circumstances would be a wry grin as well. Little old ladies with a sense of humor and unencumbered by the need to stick to social conventions are scarier than any leather clad domme.
I still maintain my claim from my previous post that 99.9% of passersby neither know nor care about people entering a playspace. However, that does leave 0.1%, who are probably local to the area and might realize what’s going on. However, it’s unlikely you’ll bump into them and even if you do, the most you’ll probably get is a knowing smile.
Although I’ve never had a problem getting into a space, taxi drivers can be annoyingly curious. Particularly when they’re picking up a solo guy from a downtown hotel and taking him to some random suburban or industrial location. My standard cover story is that I’ve a friend whose an artist and I’m visiting her at her new studio space. After all, talented dommes are artists in their own domain, and their spaces are often located in the kind of buildings artists use. Maybe when I’m old and have ceased to care, I’ll just tell them I’m visiting someone to get my bottom smacked.
This is one of the more unique looking industrial style playspaces I’ve seen, as featured in this tweet from Mistress Adreena. Lot’s of exposed brickwork, some ironwork on the right and a big a bondage frame on the left. Not to mention of course the beautiful Mistress Adreena in the center! I believe this is located in Amsterdam.
My random thought of the day: Never stress about walking up to a BDSM playspace. As long as you’re dressed like conventionally – which you absolutely should be – then nobody knows or cares what you’re doing. Passersby will just assume you’re a regular person doing regular person things.
I’ve done a lot of sessions at a lot of different spaces in many different cities. I’ve never once had a random stranger shout “Hey everyone – look at that pervert! He’s off to do weird freaky stuff in that building.” From the outside playspaces look anonymous. 99.9% of people will walk past and have no idea they’re there. Over the years I’ve personally had exactly zero awkward moments getting into and out of playspaces.
It’s also important to keep in mind that the domme is highly incentivized to keep the entrance routine under the radar. After all, she is the one regularly in the space and dealing with a constant stream of clients. No domme is going to appear at the doorway in full fetish gear and loudly command her clients to get to their knees in full view of the street. Instead the traditional entrance routine is the sideways slide, slipping through a door held only slight ajar, concealing both the domme and the hallway decorations from any random passersby.
The discrepancy between the outside of playspaces and the inside is always something that brings a smile to my face. I love that the outside can be a regular townhouse on a regular street, and inside a scene like this one can be unfolding….
This is Domina Yuki and Lucy Sweetkill playing earlier this year in a lovely San Francisco space I know well.
There really should be a genre name for the type of porn when it looks the domme has forgotten there’s a submissive in the room. It’s a small and somewhat odd niche in Femdom. I’ve never seen it in maledom material. It’d probably classify as a sub-genre of objectification and forniphilia, but at least in those the domme is typically aware of and making use of the submissive. In shots like this you get the impression she’d be surprised to look down and discover what she’s been resting her foot on. You can see another similar shot from the same scene here.
Based on the watermark I believe the original site for this has ceased to exist.
