Tag: Pro-domme

Everyone’s Against Me

My weekend adventures in San Francisco have left me feeling a little tense. Nothing too excessive. Just the kind of mild tension where you bite a chunk out of your laptop and then start mindlessly humping the leg of the desk it’s sitting on.

I wrote a couple of days ago about my initial SF session with Mistress Iris. That left me, to phrase it delicately, somewhat on edge. My second session for the trip was with Domina Yuki. We’ve played together a lot in the past, and those sessions tended to skew towards traditional masochist play. This one did feature some CBT, electricity and a beautiful leather straitjacket, but was much heavier on tease and denial, with a particular emphasis on the denial. It’s one thing to be close to someone as desirable as Domina Yuki. It’s quite another to have her tease you about how frustrating that must be and yet deny any relief.

I don’t really cry in sessions. My standard response to pain is to yell or scream. Yet this session actually had me sobbing in frustration. Yuki even commented that I was pulling expressions she’d never seen from me before. I left the play space on a high of denial, with my whole body vibrating like a tuning fork.

Of course, the universe then chose to mess with me just a little more. Crossing Union square much later that night, a rather attractive young lady propositioned me with the idea that we might enjoy a mutually satisfying business arrangement back in my hotel room. That’s not normally my kind of scene, but just for a second or two some frustrated lizard brain cells were leaping up and down shouting “Do it! Do It!” Back at the hotel, having wrestled my id into submission and regretfully declined the ladies offer, the couple in the room next door then decided it was the perfect night for a marathon sex and spanking session. I was stuck there, horny beyond all measure, on a strict Scout’s honor of no touching, and all I can hear is endless slaps, grunts and cries of ecstasy.  I probably should have put headphones on to drown them out but, like a rubbernecker at a road accident, I couldn’t drag myself away. I might not have had any orgasms recently, but the couple in room 541 certainly made up the averages for me.

This was a shot from our scene, with me leaning over a spanking bench and Domina Yuki on top. There’s a similar shot from the same angle that better shows off Yuki’s beautiful boots here. There was also a very hot short movie, but sadly I don’t have the bandwidth to host it here. If  you can’t manage an in person session, but would like to see more of Domina Yuki and her scenes, then I’d suggest checking out her OnlyFans site. She posts a lot of great content to it.

A Brief Migration South

There’s a few inches of snow in Seattle. For many parts of America this would mean it was a mild winter day, but for Seattle it’s snowpocalypse. I’m really not kidding about that. People are stripping the local stores of produce, and emptying the hardware stores of snow clearing equipment. In terms of chaos, from my social media feed, it seems to rank somewhere above the Seahawks winning the Superbowl and just a touch below a zombie uprising.

Fortunately, I’m in San Francisco for a few days of fun, well away from the mess. Today I found the best possible way to keep warm and celebrate my well timed trip – playing with Mistress Iris. We had a wonderful session, with a lot of growling, snarling, whimpering, scratching and biting. There was no explicit animal role play, but if a nosy neighbor had sneaked up to  listen, I’m sure they would have thought otherwise. It’s odd, because I’m a fairly quiet person in normal life. Yet wrap some rope around me, and grab me by the balls, and suddenly I turn into an animal sound effects catalog.

This is Mistress Iris with some rather more attractive pets. Pedigree puppies versus me the mangy mutt. This is from a post on her instagram feed.

Canary in a Coal Mine

The Slixa site launched an essay contest in December on the subject of the SESTA-FOSTA laws. They were offering $10,000 in prize money for both the authors and their charities of choice. The winners were recently announced, and I was very happy to see that Lucy Khan had taken the top spot with her essay: Against FOSTA/SESTA: One Canary’s Cry From Inside the Coal Mine.

I’ve been lucky enough to session with Lucy multiple times in the past. She has always impressed me as a highly intelligent and insightful person, so it’s great to see her pick up this award and money for SWOP-LA. In fact LA pro-domme’s managed to score two out of the three top spots, with Grace Marie picking up the second place prize. Meghan Peterson, a researcher and sex worker rights advocate, stopped an LA/pro-domme sweep by picking up the third spot. I think all three essays are really well written and well worth reading, so check them all out here.

Given it’s Chinese New Year, this seems an appropriate image of Mistress Lucy to feature. She’s in the center, flanked by Daddy An Li (left) and Mistress Damiana Chi (right). It was taken from a Chinese New Year Play Party hosted at The Chi Temple. The submissive is appropriately attired, given it’s the Chinese year of the brown pig.

Papers, Please

This image is a fabulous item of femdom memorabilia. It’s a passport for the Other World Kingdom, more commonly known as OWK. For those that have never heard of it, OWK was a femdom micronation, designed to be an order of magnitude bigger and more immersive than your typical pro-domme playspace. This previous post contains some useful links that provide more context.

I knew that Queen Patricia ran it like a self-contained kingdom, with its own laws, flags and currency, but I didn’t realize they went as far as issuing official looking passports. This particular example belongs to Dominatrix Irene Boss,  and was featured in this tweet from her. I particularly like the fact that slaves weren’t issues passports but were instead simply listed by a count, alongside the number of animals she was travelling with (see this inside page).

Dominatrix Irene Boss is a Pittsburgh based pro-domme. You can see her official site here.

Adding Insult to Injury

Some days you just want to punch something. This would unfortunately be one of them.

The initial trigger for this anger was seeing that Alchemy Rooms, the playspace of UK based Mistress Tess, had been broken into and vandalized. You can see some of the results in this tweet and this one. It pretty clearly wasn’t a burglary or random destruction. This was some fuck head on a targeted mission to ruin the space.

As often happens these days when something like this happens, a GoFundMe was set-up to help Mistress Tess out. I was actually planning to feature a link to it in a post today. Yet, incredibly it got shut down because of some vague and unspecified terms of service violation. These was nothing pornographic in the appeal, the funds were clearly going to fix the vandalism, and the police had been informed. Professional domination is entirely legal in the UK, but apparently the merest suggestion of BDSM is enough to get a very worthwhile appeal pulled.

The good news is that, according to this follow-up tweet, Mistress Tess will at least get the money that had been raised before the shutdown. But if you ever needed a story that encapsulates the many challenges that sex workers face, this one pretty much captures it all. In the meantime, if you want to support Mistress Tess, then buy some of her clips.  You get femdom porn and she gets money to help rebuild her space. Which in turn she can use to make more money and give people amazing kinky experiences. It’s a win-win-win.

You can see more shots like this at Mistress Tess’ main site. Her clips can be purchased at clips4sale and iwantclips.

A Space for Grown-Ups

I’ve written in the past about my preference for play spaces that are light, airy and modern. Doing a session in them always feels more serious and purposeful. Adults exploring something complex, rather than kids playing at being mistress/slave in a faux dungeon or torture chamber.

One of the nicest I’ve seen in recent years has been put together by Mistress Jade Thunderstorm of New Orleans and featured in her recent tweet. I love how clean and elegant it is – there’s even trailing greenery! That devious looking chair was custom made for the space.

Mistress Jade was based in Seattle before New Orleans, and I was lucky enough to session with her a couple of years back, before she moved. She’s definitely someone worth seeking out if you’re in the New Orleans area. I just wish she’d stayed and built that beautiful space here.

Bondage Therapy in Seattle

Bondage virtuoso Elise Graves has been in Seattle for the last few days. Primarily she was here to shoot for House of Gord, but she did reserve time for a couple of private sessions, and I was lucky enough to score one of them. A lovely mix of whipping, electrical play and bondage was the result. We didn’t get pictures, but fortunately for me, she did shoot them in her other session, as shown here.  I’m not sure who the other Seattle submissive is, but my thanks to him for these shots. He appears to be doing a better job of handling the rope suspension than I did.

Rope isn’t normally my favored bondage medium. I realized today that a big part of that is the time it often takes. When I’ve limited time to play, and I’m paying by the hour, I somewhat resent burning a lot of the session getting into and out of bondage. The process can be enjoyable, but not as enjoyable as what comes afterward. Fortunately, with an expert like Elise, that becomes far less of an issue. I’ve played with a lot of word class dommes, but I think she’s the fastest rigger I’ve ever experienced. She very quickly pulled together well balanced positions, with just the right degree of stress.

Elise’s smile in this image is very indicative of the way she plays. There was a lot of happy positive energy in our scene today. This image is from her Bondage Liberate site. I found it via her twitter feed.

Manners Maketh Man

A tweet by Mistress Tess recently caught my eye.

I was helping him into a dress. He put his hand near my shoulder and said “May I?” instead of just automatically putting his hand on my shoulder to balance. This is called having RESPECT AND MANNERS! It’s not okay to freely touch your Goddess. Remember that guys.

I liked this for a number of reasons. Firstly, politeness is all sorts of hot. I’m not big on high kink protocol,  but love the more gentle dance of manners and courtesy in daily life. Secondly, it reminded me of my yoga teacher, who is a stickler for checking before touching any part of me. Initially it made me smile. I’m not used to women checking before grabbing me. Over time I’ve come to appreciate it and her attention to that kind of detail.

Finally, I liked it because denial leads to desire. To be close to someone as amazing as Mistress Tess, to have her do terrible but wonderful things to you, and yet to not touch her is a gift in itself. To be so near, and yet so far. As a masochist I deal with pain by drawing on my feelings and submission to the domme. The deeper those feelings, the greater the reverence I hold for her, the harder and further I can push into intense play. Respect and restraint really helps build that kind of dynamic.

This image is from the website of Mistress Tess. The post title comes from this rather well done fight scene.

Tripping

On the face of it, this article about a poker player experiencing sensory deprivation to win a bet has nothing to do with femdom. However, I’m linking to it because sensory deprivation is definitely a kink and the hallucinations he experienced actually reminded me of some of my own experiences with that particular kink.

I’ve always been limited to a couple of hours of reduced senses, rather the days he went through. On the other hand, I mix in heavy bondage, pain and breath control, which certainly ups the intensity of the experience. A couple of times in the state I had a sense of space opening up around me, my consciousness drifting in a large dark void, with spinning yellow stars moving around me and away from me. In hindsight I’m surprised I didn’t freak out, particularly given that sensory deprivation is a pretty tough scene for me to handle at the best of times. I think I intuitively knew, much like the poker player in the article, that embracing the vision and relaxing into it was the key to handling it. If memory serves me correctly, it only lasted a short period before I was quickly snapped back to reality by the domme electrocuting my testicles. That’s always guaranteed to capture a man’s attention.

This image is from Lady Hinako. From her blog and twitter feed she’s clearly an expert at heavy bondage and sensory deprivation scenes. I particularly like the contrast in this image between the cute doll like figure and the obvious immobilization and sensory restriction the man inside is experiencing.

Vulnerability

Mistress Lola Ruin has published a lovely blog post on her experiences of sharing her own vulnerability with slaves and letting the facade of being a perfect dominant Goddess slip. I like the post a lot because I’ve always thought the idea of needing to present a perfect invulnerable facade to be a great domme was badly flawed. Deep down we know that we’re all human, so to pretend otherwise lacks authenticity. A domme shouldn’t have to fit herself into a submissive’s fantasy in order to be respected and exalted. Those things should come even with knowledge of the dommes humanity and vulnerabilities. That’s what makes them meaningful.

Mistress Lola Ruin is  a pro-domme based in Manchester, UK. You find her twitter feed here and information on arranging a session with her here.