Smiles and Champagne

Continuing the happy BDSM theme – here’s a shot from the recent International FemDom Summit in Bucharest. Technically I guess it only shows the dommes smiling. It’s not clear what the footstools think of the whole situation. However, I’m going to assume their happy about it. I think I would be.

I have to admit I wasn’t aware of the Femdom Summit, but judging by their twitter feed it seems like an interesting event with a lot of great attendees. You can read a blog post on it by Mistress Ayn here. There’s also a twitter list of the attendees here.

Smiles and Strappado

This lovely shot – courtesy of Elise Graves and Bondage Liberation – reminded me of the old tumblr ‘Happy BDSM.’ Its content was exactly as its name suggests and was featured here in past posts.

The original site is now sadly defunct, gone the way of most tumblrs, but I’m a little surprised that nobody has thought to resurrect the concept. For kinky folks I think its contents effect was much the same as seeing posts of cute animals doing adorable things. It’s an ‘ahhh’ moment – a little hit of endorphins and happiness before we go about our day.

You can find the original image, along with others from this scene, via this tweet. Elise is a professional rigger, bondage model and domme based in SF. You can find her Bondage Liberation site here and her twitter feed here.  The male performer is the West Coast based Ruckus.

Lamps – Part 5

Regular and attentive readers will be aware of one of my stranger and longer running series – submissives as lamps. The first entry was back in 2011 and the fourth and last (that I can find) was in 2018. I have a feeling there was another entry a year or two back that was unfortunately lost in the big blog blowup.

Anyway, that’s a longwinded introduction to a 5th (or possibly 6th) entry to the series. Apologies for the delay to everyone out there who have been eagerly awaiting its return. This one comes courtesy of Lady Lux of The Netherlands. Her submissive is so happy about the scene he’s positively glowing.

You can find Lady Lux’s professional site here and her Twitter feed here.

Life’s Rich Tapestry

Warning: A sad blog post ahead. Not this specific on. I mean this one from Mistress Simone. It’s on her experiences with her submissives that have passed away. A thought provoking and moving post.

I was going to follow it up by commenting on how complex the pro-domme and client relationship is. But that’s not entirely true. I’d hate to put off nervous potential clients by over over-emphasizing that aspect of the dynamic.

They can be very simple. A mutually beneficial but limited interaction where someone scratches a kinky itch and someone else earnings a living. They can be delightful but ephemeral. The stars align, it’s magical, and then you never manage to meet again. They can be boring and unfulfilling. I’ve had a sessions – admittedly just a few out of many hundreds – that I thought were just meh. The chemistry isn’t there and you have to move on. And occasionally, as Mistress Simone describes, they can be deep, long lasting and complex. Like most relationships, you never know what you’ll find until you try.

This is Mistress Simone as featured on her professional site. She’s a Chicago and Saint Loius based pro-domme. You can find more of her thoughts via her twitterblog and prodcast.

Cabinet of Curiosities

I love this shot of shelves of shiny toys posted by Ms Estelle Leon. It has a touch of sci-fi, a suggestion of a medical museum and most than a dash of a David Cronenberg film set.

It’s also fun to pick out which ones I’ve played with and which remain still to be sampled. Versions of most of the pinchy, bindy or inserty things have been on or in me at some point. The Kali’s teeth device in the bottom right gives me particularly happy memories of playing with Domina Yuki. My most significant omission is probably the various chastity devices. Still yet to try playing with one of those.

Ms Estelle Leon is a Melbourne based professional dominatrix. You can find her primary site here and her twitter here.

What do we owe each other?

I pose the question in the post’s title based on this thread by Dia Dynasty. She writes about a long term slave who abruptly ended their relationship via email. A fact which hurt and deeply disappointed her. It’s a sad situation, but one which I think raises the general question: What do we owe each other in that kind of relationship?

I’m specifically referring to a professional relationship which – thanks to its length and close nature – has developed beyond just a simple transaction. Obviously, in a non-professional context a kinky relationship is no different to breaking-up in any relationship. At least in terms of the need for compassion, understanding and respect. But how does the presence of a transactional element change things?

I don’t have a glib or easy answer. I just thought it was an interesting question to ponder. Maybe, for the little they’ll be worth, I’ll share some musings in a follow-up post.

This is Dia Dynasty, a wholistic femdom practitioner, based out of NYC. You can find her professional site here and her twitter feed here. She’s also the Matriarch of the Femdom Farm.

Fashion or Fetish? Part III

Here’s the third and final part of my fetish or fashion game. This time it’s a two-for-one deal, with an image from each category. But which one is from the world of fashion and which from the world of fetish? I suspect regular readers may find it a little easy given who is featured, but it’s an image I couldn’t resist.

If you guessed the first was fashion and the second was fetish then congratulations. Have a gold star. Or maybe, more appropriately, a shiny leather one. The first image is Carmen Electra, shot by  Josef Jasso for Nylon magazine. You can see more images from the shoot here. The second one is, as I’m sure many readers might have recognized, the incomparable Mistress Iris. This was from her twitter feed.

Hot Advice

I’m always a fan of mainstream magazines running positive articles on BDSM and ideas for kinky play. Getting more people to explore their sexual interests is great. However, the media have a tendency to lead with the high risk stuff, which is pretty much the last thing new kinksters should be trying in their bedroom.

Take for example this Vice article on temperature play. It’s titled a beginners guide, but in the first half dives into topics like making fire torches with alcohol and dropping flammable propane bubbles on people’s skin. Admittedly they add a bunch of caveats about not trying it without training, but why start there in a beginners guide? There’s a ton of fun temperature stuff you can do with hot wax and ice cubes that isn’t likely to land you in the ER. Pretty much by definition, if you’re learning about temperature play for the first time from a Vice article, there’s nothing you should be doing in the nude with flammable gases or liquids. Leave it to the professionals.

This is the striking Lady Lola, someone who is very much a professional. She is a London based pro-domme who lists fire play as one of her specialties. You can find her professional site here and her twitter feed here.

The Agony of Choice

Choosing images for this site can be an erratic process. Sometimes I can scroll through endless pages of tumblr’s, tweets and my personal image trove and not find anything that catches my eye. On the other hand, there are some content creators where why challenge is not simply reposting everything they do. I could happily re-post all of Sardax’s work or every image that Mistress Iris shares.

Elise Graves is another of those kinky content creators whose work I could happily feature on any or every day of the week. This shot for her Bondage Liberation site is a great example of why. It’s got a beautiful blend of heavy bondage and emotional tenderness. Just the kind of mix that pushes my buttons.

This was sourced from a tweet that has some more great shots from the same scene. It features Elise with Heavy, photographed by Kino Payne. You can get this film and more like on the Bondage Liberation site.