Whip – Page 6 – Femdom Resource

Just the bare essentials

I continue to mull over the ‘Desert Island Kinky Toy’ concept that I mentioned in yesterday’s post. If you haven’t read that yet, I suggest starting there before going any further. It’ll be less confusing that way.

As well as music, the island castaway also gets to choose one book to take, but the Bible and the complete works of Shakespeare are also always provided. I assume they did this to prevent lots of people picking them and thus making the book selection a less interesting part of the show. I’m not sure if these two would be the standard provision if the show started today, but they probably made a lot of sense to the gentlemen running the BBC in the 1940’s.

It got me to thinking: In the BDSM version of the show (as produced and directed by yours truly), what would be automatically given to the kinky castaways? In other words, what two items would be on almost everyone’s list, and therefore should be provided by default to avoid repitition?

I think an obvious one is rope. Great for bondage, gags, makeshift leashes, suspension from palm trees, staking people out on the beach, etc. Useful in a multitude of ways, I think it’d be something everyone would pick. Plus, years as a castaway might actually give you time to complete at least one of those fancy rope corset arrangements that look so cool.

After that obvious selection it gets a little more difficult. A whip? A bit single-purpose and not everyone’s taste. A cane? Probably easy enough to mimic from local flora and fauna. A strap-on? Chastity device? Needles? All great, but all specialist choices that not everyone would take. Quite honestly I pondered this question all day at work. I almost answered ‘nipple clamps’ to a question in a meeting on data center construction, which would at least have livened the discussion up.

It wasn’t until I was making dinner tonight that I figured out what I think is the answer – a big bed with loads of tie points. Something like this or this. It’s so versatile that everyone could use it. Good for bondage, corporal, breathplay, fucking, massage, medical and even sleeping if all that tires you out. Try doing all that on a canvas hammock slung between a couple of palm trees. Despite playing with a lot of great custom made dungeon furniture over the last few years, a lot of my best scenes have happened on a bed.

Annoyingly I couldn’t quickly locate any suitable shots featuring ropes and beds, so here’s a nice one that’s heavy on the rope and adds a little whipping into the mix.

I found this on the Fun Fantasies tumblr. It’s obviously originally from Men in Pain.

The complexity of corporal

I have a complex relationship with corporal style punishment. Before I got physically involved in BDSM it was one of the primary things I fantasized about, probably secondly only to bondage in my internal kinky hit parade. It was the focus of my very first play session, and I’d still describe it as a favorite activity. Yet, when I come to look back at the type of play I’ve done over the past couple of years, it has not been a frequently occurring theme. Things like CBT, breathplay, piercing and bondage have all been more popular picks. I’m not entirely sure why that is.

I do know that I’m typically more nervous before a corporal scene than other type of scene. There’s something a little more wild and uncontrolled about corporal play. Where I can relax and space out on something like CBT, a whipping or a caning feels more like a challenge. They’re a duet where I have a real role to play. There’s also a very different energy around it. Where some scenes can feel intimate, with a closed shared sense of energy, a corporal scene is far more cathartic. There’s a distance between myself and the dominant, with a creation and outward expression of energy.

I suspect that last factor is at least part of why I’ve done them less frequently in the last couple of years. I’ve felt more in need of close scenes, involving personal connection with the dominant, rather than powerful moments of catharsis. Although that might be changing. After last weeks beating I’m now feeling really antsy for another. Unfortunately both Lydia and I will be traveling over the next few weeks, so for the moment it looks like I’ll have to content myself with hot pictures such as this one.

This is from the Latin Beauties in High Heels site. I originally found it on the SM Images (aka fun fantasies) tumblr.

The top ways we injure our genitals

Picking titles for posts is always tricky. When I have time, I like to come up with something a little more than a simple description of the post itself. Ideally it’d be a joke or cultural reference that raises a smile. However, in this particular case, I didn’t think I could beat the title of this article in the Atlantic.

Apparently around 16,000 people in the U.S. injure their genitals every year, 69% of them men. The top risk is cycling, followed by trimming/shaving and then zippers. I know there are a lot of people out there that enjoy CBT, but sex/BDSM related injuries don’t feature in the top risk categories. So it looks like most people are playing safety. Just steer clear of those bicycles.

I’ll leave you with a couple of shots of Mistress Madeline risking making Rico one of the sixteen thousand. Not content with swinging the whip, she also tries a stun baton on him.

All shots are from this shoot at Divine Bitches.

City view. Two bedrooms. Whipping on request.

I’m sort-of looking for a new place to live. I say ‘sort-of’ because there’s a high inertia factor involved. I’d love a fabulous penthouse condo with a great view, but lacking the several million dollars required for that, I tend to default to not moving at all. Of course if zillow actually listed the places I was likely to get a whipping from my neighbors, then maybe I’d be a little more incentivized. My current neighbor certainly glares a lot, but that really doesn’t do much for me masochistically speaking. Offer me a coffee, scrambled eggs and a whipping from the lady across the street and I’ll be onboad any fixer upper that’s going.

This image is from the very talented Camille MM. Her site has a number of free images available, as well as a much larger collection available via the membership section.

First date

I hate first dates. Not dating itself. Just the starting part. I dislike the carefully choreographed dance of over-thought emails needed to set-up a suitable meeting. I worry about how and if I should slide the topic of kink into the conversation. The cynical mathematician living in my brain computes the worldwide ratio of first dates to successful relationships and whispers that I’m probably wasting my time. Most of all, I hate the uncertainty of the end. Do we hug, kiss or fuck? Seeing as I’m British I sometimes settle for shaking hands, which might help explain why I’m still single.

I need to meet up with a few more ladies like the one in the drawing by Rodzo below. The man might not be all that comfortable. The whip might be painful. Oxygen could start to be an issue. But at least he doesn’t have to worry about that awkward moment on her doorstep at the end of the evening.

Swinging the single-tail

I had my back and ass well and truly striped today by Mistress Cynthia Stone. She used one of the heaviest single tails I’ve yet experienced and the resulting marks are pretty special. We snapped photographs so hopefully in a future post I’ll be able to share some images.

Until that exciting moment (settle down at the back there), I’ll restrict myself to this shot (via Selina Minx’s tumblr) of a whipping from the movie The Million Eyes of Su-Muru. With an imdb rating of 2.6/10, it’s clearly not a forgotten classic. However, it does look like the kind of film I’d have watched as a teenager with rapt attention and a strange feeling in my underpants.

Happiness is the moment before impact

I have a bone to pick with you guys and girls. I just discovered that on my Femdom Images page the link to the Geek Domme tumblr was incorrectly pointing at the Following Blindly Again tumblr. Now technically speaking I realize that this was entirely my mistake. And the following blindly tumblr is a jolly fine one in it’s own right. But come on people. Thousands of you are looking at that page everyday (I know because my server logs tell me so) and nobody spotted that mistake? We’re collaborating here, don’t leave it all to this idiot.

I’ll make my apologies by featuring an image I found and enjoyed on the Geek Domme tumblr. There’s a lot to like here. The simplicity of her outfit. The marks already on his body. The expression on his face. The minimalism of the shot, and the tension of the impending impact. It’s a great image, courtesy of Smutty Productions.

A good day

Today was a good day. I got well whipped and well fed. My back is now nicely striped. Although perhaps not quite as well striped as this gentleman. He looks like he has received a very thorough going over.

I found this via the Femdom Empire tumblr. I believe it’s originally from the Club Dom site.

When a session goes bad (part 1)

My experience of playing with pro-dommes has been an overwhelmingly positive one. I’ve had many great sessions, and I’ve documented a few of them on this blog. In all the time I’ve been playing I’ve only had one really bad session. While that session was clearly an aberration, it struck me that it’s probably worth writing about. After all it’s easy to find lots of posts eulogizing great dommes and amazing sessions. It’s much harder to find discussion on the effect of play that turns sour. Looking back at the session the physical interaction itself doesn’t seem particularly significant, but what was interesting was the way it left me feeling for days afterwards.

I should start by saying that this session wasn’t with anyone I’ve named here in the past. Dommes like Lydia and Yuki have been unfailingly enjoyable to play with and I’d never hesitate to recommend them. The domme in question here will remain unnamed, as she’s still active and I don’t particularly want to get into a back and forth with her or any of her fans.

We’d played together a couple of times previously and I’d enjoyed those sessions, but I had been a little surprised at her reactions when things hadn’t gone as planned. In my experience a good domme is always able to adapt and modify the flow of a scene based on the feedback she gets. She’s always in control, but that doesn’t mean everything has to happen exactly as she originally envisioned. This particular domme seemed to become frustrated and react with a touch of anger when things didn’t work out. That struck me as a bad sign. Being in control of the scene means being in control of yourself as well as the submissive.

The unpleasantness started about an hour or so into our third session. She had me spread on an X-frame and had spent 20 or so minutes working me over with various floggers and paddles. At a natural break, while she switched implements, she asked how I was doing. My fingers were going numb thanks to the overhead position and tight leather wrist cuffs, and I mentioned this fact. This was apparently a mistake. I’m not sure what feedback she was looking for, but this clearly wasn’t it, as she got rather vexed. I actually hadn’t asked to stop, but she did stop and unhooked my hands in an angry fashion.

What followed was a quite surreal conversation/argument. I was naked and still shackled to the X-frame by my feet, but with my hands free so I could work the feeling into them. She was sulking in a chair across the room complaining how I was wasting her time. Apparently I shouldn’t be doing such long sessions (we were scheduled for 3 hours) if I couldn’t take it. This struck me as ludicrous. The length of overall session was irrelevant to this particular issue, and if anyone was missing out on active play time it was me. She also tried to make some bizarre point that if this was lifestyle play I wouldn’t be getting the option to stop. That didn’t seem a particularly convincing line of reasoning.

I’m normally not someone to let a stupid statement slide without comment. When my friends describe me the expression “Doesn’t tolerate fools gladly” is often in there somewhere. The problem was that just seconds before we’d been in a D/s mode, which made for a very confusing dynamic. I wanted to talk through the situation, but still had a submissive mindset. The intellectual bit of my brain was saying “Fuck this. She’s out of line.” where the emotional part was saying “She’s in charge. Don’t argue.” Suddenly all the tools of dominance that I enjoyed seemed to conspire against me. Being naked, bound and vulnerable is normally wonderful, but when the energy turned bad it made it hard to be assertive and take back my submission.

In hindsight I should have simply stopped the session at this point. I never want to play in an angry negative context. However, at the time it never occurred to me to try and stop. I was too busy trying to deal with my conflicting instincts of arguing versus submitting. The end result was a confused discussion that only made her more stroppy.

…To be continued in part 2…

Picking a picture for this post wasn’t easy. People typically don’t post pictures of bad sessions. Instead I’ve gone with a shot of some play from Men are Slaves that features both corporal and a cuffed X-position. I’m sure the participants below are having a lot more fun than I ended up having.

Holy single tail batman!

I know there are a lot of catwoman fans out there, so here’s a couple of enjoyable images of her. They’re stylistically different but both feature a very happy looking catwoman . The first is by BatgirlOfGotham (free deviant login required), and has a nice big single tail with a stoic (as ever) batman. Hopefully she’ll soon whip a smile onto his face. The second image is by Stephanie Buscema and is based on the Julie Newmar catwoman character. It’s not exactly a kinky shot, but it a very cheerful one, which gives it a great deal of appeal to me. If you like it, she has a number of similar images featuring female superheros on her site. And while I’m on the batman topic, just to finish, here’s a link to great batgirl shot by the artist Houston Sharp.